saying that it had been ages since he’d come home would be an overstatement in reality, but to amycus it felt as if many years had come and gone since he’d last stepped foot in his childhood home. it had changed and by the looks of it, it hadn’t been for the better. he’d heard about the raids on death eaters homes - the order coming in and tearing the places up with justice on the brain, praying to find any evil doer sitting in their home, ready and waiting to pick a fight. that hadn’t be the case for the carrow household, or at least he had hoped. amycus knew his father never came back to this house, not since both he and his sister had run from it and never looked back. alecto, however, he knew was different. this home held something to her that he felt even now, his skin tingling and heart thumping loud in his chest as every memory lived and felt in the house crept the outer corners of his dark mind. there was tragedy here, for them both, and that would never be gone. the order could reduce the place to ashes and both the carrow children’s hearts would still ache with grief at the horror they endured between the walls of the towering estate. he knew they both felt it differently, alecto’s manifesting as intensity and pure hatred towards life while amycus’ had become a quite disdain that sat beneath surface and built up over time. they made a wickedly dysfunctional pair and that is how it has always been till as of late.
they’d separated not long ago, their roles as death eaters taking them down different paths that the other couldn’t follow. it had been a painful goodbye, the inseparable pair finally being ripped apart for the first true time in their adult lives. they knew they would see each other again, or so amycus had hoped in their time away - but so much time had passed and not a single word from his sister had returned back to him. of course he heard the gossip, death eaters could be nosy gits at times, that she had become the most fierce and loyal follower that voldemort could ask for. it was just like alecto to be the strongest in the pack, the one confidant that the dark lord trusted and needed by his side in their time of war. part of him was proud of her for her achievements, this is what they had always wanted, but a darker part was furious that their leader was getting the attention from his sister that had always been his. alecto had always been his. now she couldn’t bother to write or even come find him, her love now funneled into the cause instead of the other carrow twin.
even letting the thought cross his mind angered him, that familiar resentment rooted deep in his chest flaring back up as he let it overtake him once more. surely he thought he’d been more important than voldemort, but now he was learning otherwise and it was more painful than he could have ever imagined. that is why he’d come here. he needed to flush his sister out of his system, but he wanted to feel all the good that came from their relationship before he let it all go. all the laughter and smiles they had once shared in this home. this is where their love had bloomed. a bond between two family members that was unlike any other amycus had ever had. she was the other half to his broken soul and being back in the very place where they had both connected for the first time brought a certain peace to him that he wasn’t sure he was ready to let go of.
the place was in ruins, the floorboards and furniture dark and ruined by time and nature. everything had gained a gloomy feel, almost like there had never been people really living here. if you didn’t know better, you’d think the house had been abandoned since its creation. only little things remained, but even they were in not so great condition. the old books amycus would read to alecto when she had night terrors, the family photos where there wasn’t a single smile in sight, an old piano that had collected so much dust you could no longer tell it was once beautiful oak. it had all gained age and dirt, time tearing away the memories from the objects as the home stayed frayed and collapsing.
his footsteps were loud on the creaky floorboards, his breath coming in short puffs as the smallest bit of anxiety raised in him as amycus slowly circled the home. he didn’t miss it, he only missed what it had given him. though there were always going to be memories he would repress as hard as humanly possible, there were always the ones he built with alecto, the ones he loved and standing in what was once their living room, he felt them all.
it was only when he heard the tiniest shuffled that amycus tensed up, snapping back to reality as his entire body shifted into defense mode. now an instinct, his hand gripped the solid handle of his wand that was tucked into his coat, the man poised and ready to unforgivable whoever had dared to intrude on his private moment. he’d kill them if need be. that was who he was now. long gone were the days of the silly hexes he’d cast on his fellow classmates in the halls of hogwarts - the war had hardened him and he felt no remorse in murder.
“you better think before you doing anything,” he said slowly, not turning around to face whoever it was that he could feel approaching him from behind, “i’m not above killing you for coming into this house.”