————— ❛ with flared nostrils, alecto struggled to keep a neutral expression. the butt of her chin was raised as her jaw tightened at his words, the lump in her throat swelling with each word that rolled off his venom slicked tongue. “i thought you wanted this? i thought we wanted this.” a hint of exasperation reared its head in the depth of her words, a genuine look of confusion etched across her sharp features before settling into a look of — sympathy? it was rare (if you could consider something that’d occurred but once before in all her years of living a rarity) that alecto genuinely took the time to step back and reflect on how she made others feel, but in this moment, she did just that.
for much of her life alecto carrow considered herself a lost cause, a drifter. nothing of greater substance was ever in the cards for her, nor her brother. neither of them, or any carrow for that matter, was destined for greatness. the two differed greatly from the majority of their peers in the wizarding world, all of whom had the stepping stones to greatness carefully laid out in their own predetermined intricate paths. alecto could only speak for herself, though surely amycus could agree, but neither of them ever had much of plan for what was to come. they were not delicately groomed so they could one day take over a renowned family business, nor were they carefully molded into the prim, proper, and exceptional young adults who would be plucked by the ministry to uphold the laws of the wizarding world. despite their obvious lack of predetermined greatness, alecto refused to be just another blip on the map. no matter the consequences, there would be glory and greatness behind the carrow name.
of course she’d never expected said glory and greatness to come through the allegiance she pledged to the dark lord and his cause, but alecto’s view of the world had grown dark and misconstrued through the years. she was a product of her environment— at no fault of her own did she wind up in the carrow family. one could ask, well, why didn’t she rise above the shambles that she was raised upon and overcome the toxicity of her childhood? the answer was quite simply, really. this wasn’t a novel, nor a movie, this was reality. not often do we find the strength to become more than what we were born into, more than what fate had predetermined us to be. so, you see, alecto carrow didn’t necessarily choose this path, it was simply her fate. amycus though, he could have been more had it not been for alecto. he’d always had an unbreakable resolve and sense of self, but his chance at pure and actual greatness and glory was tainted by the cloud of dark bitterness that was alecto carrow.
alecto was his devil in disguise —a loving hand outstretched to carefully escort him further and further down an inescapable path of pure darkness. had it not been for her, amycus may have never uttered that unforgivable curse, or any for that matter. had it not been for her, he may have never ended up in azkaban. sure, they were out now, but at what cost? they were fugitives, menaces to society—villains. unfortunately she could still perfectly recall the day she ultimately led him past the point of no return, not a single second thought floating around her mind. the same twinge of jealousy that plagued her that day was currently rising in her chest as the memory of amycus carefully splayed out beneath a tree with that damn ravenclaw git and a carefree smile clouded her vision. she couldn’t begin to explain why the sight brought such feelings upon her, but she never was one to carefully pore over the details of a situation. no matter the love she had for her brother, she was disgustingly self-centered. alecto wanted greatness for her brother, but her wish for him to lead a happy life was overshadowed by her selfishness.
“i’m sorry.” the words fell awkwardly from her lips, the feel of them heavy and foreign on her tongue. by now she had erased every bit of physical distance she’d just put between them, her head tilted back as to capture his gaze with her own. “i just wanted something more for us—for myself.” the beating of her heart kicked up three gears as it violently thumped against her chest, the vulnerability she was willingly expressing causing her body to react unfavorably. “i just,” her knee wobbled as her heel tapped dully on the wooden floorboards, “i want people to look at me and see somebody powerful, somebody strong. i want you to look at me and see what i’ve always seen in you, amycus.”
this exact moment in time - there with his sister, their entire past laid out around them as a ghostly reminder of what they’d endured together - would have been the perfect moment had the emotions from his sisters confession not been running so thick through the air that it felt like it was choking amycus. words had truly failed him for the first time in his life. there was no witty comment to be thrown, no tantalizing smirk with matching commentary to make this all better like he so often resorted to when the moment got the better of him. he couldn’t hide behind his wickedness as easily with alecto as he could with literally anyone else. it felt like she stripped him of his easy, breezy facade - leaving nothing but a twisted and vulenarble mess in her wake.
“don’t.” the word was soft, just barely falling from between his lips as he fought to keep his restraint in tact, willing himself not to fall into her words. she’d apologized to him, something that he never thought he’d hear, nor could recall hearing from his twin in the years they’d walked this earth. it wasn’t a word that alecto carrow said, yet here she was using it so seriously with him, no falsity behind it. it stirred something within him that he couldn’t identify, a foreign emotion tearing its way to the surface, beating back every rational thought and feeling he should have been having in that moment.
“i don’t like hearing you apologize to me,” he kept his eyes locked on hers, allowing himself to truly look at her for the first time since she’d gotten here. her beauty had always astounded him, but never more than right now. his hand, though only afflicted with a small shake, found its way to the soft skin of her cheek, palm caressing it gently as if any pressure would break the porcelain beneath it, “you are far too strong to be apologizing to any man, alecto. you need not worry about people not seeing you as powerful, because that is far from the truth. you’ve always been the greater of the two of us and that is okay with me. i’m happy to follow in the footsteps of such a capable woman, especially one that can wretch fear into any heart simply with that awful gaze of hers.”
he wouldn’t describe his sudden turn around as guilt, per say, but that was a fraction of the weight behind his words. his sister was one of the greatest wizards he’d ever laid eyes on and he’d always done his best to express that to her, just maybe not as much in the last few months. he’d let his jealousy get the better of him. he’d acted liked a child who abandoned the one person he couldn’t live without because he didn’t like seeing her raise to power with the help of another man. it was petty and distasteful and he knew that, but he couldn’t help himself. there had always been something deeper there when it came to her, though it be darker than hell, he still felt it and there was no way he could hide that. not from himself and not from her - not anymore.
“never apologize to me again,” he breathed, his tone dark and wanting as he did the one thing he’d always fought against, the repercussions within himself proving too great had she not actually felt that connection he thought they shared. he lips just barely brushed hers, his heart racing so loudly he was surprised it wouldn’t jump straight from his chest as he dared to make the move that would prove incredible, or his greatest regret, “but also remember that you’re mine, alecto. only mine.”
vaporwave
theartofmadeline
origamiaround
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2087
jacobvanloon
dailybridgerton
