#eggcourse

[velvetvexations]

something ive been thinking about: the kind of person who thinks that "eggs need to be cracked ASAP" about trans people- or, well. let's be real, they're usually talking about trans women specifically.

it's... genuinely a rather disrespectful attitude from every perspective i can think of.

there are so many ways that they may be wrong about "this person has to be a trans woman!"-

they could just legitimately be a cis man who's like that, and misgendering them is... like, even if you believe it doesn't cause harm, that doesn't stop it from being disrespectful to take someone's identity and presume to know them better than they do, and say "actually no you're this instead".

they could be a trans man, for whom misgendering and treating like a woman is essentially trying to detransition them. which, like- we can all agree that "trying to detransition a trans person because you think they'd be better living as their agab" is bad, right? .........right?

they could identify with something not constrained within the standard gender binary, for whom treating them like a woman may be any number of things- exorsexism in action, an attempt to enforce a hostile culture's gender construction (after all, not everybody views things as a simple "man/woman" binary, right?), etc.

and even if they are a trans woman, then... the way that these people seem to treat it is that without being "cracked", or "forcefemmed", or however they want to describe it, as fast as possible? that trans woman is going to be lost and suffer for who knows how long. what happened to letting people take their identity at their own pace? sure, maybe, for some people, being slapped in the face by "what if you're a trans woman though" may be just what is needed, but there are going to be a lot of people who will sink further into denial over it, who find being pushed about this kind of thing unpleasant and uncomfortable.

... and then there's also going to be people who are susceptible to pressure over things like this- people who may be struggling with identity already, because of trauma or depression or any number of things.

"pushing someone to identify and live how you think they should" feels like an approach that is always going to have issues with disrespectful attitudes towards those you think you know better than, because... well, it's fundamentally a presumption that you know them better than they know themselves, and that you know how to fix them. it's hard for that attitude to not be disrespectful!

but of course, "giving the space for someone to identify and live how they want" might result in less trans women. and the point is to "save" all the helpless trans women, not to help create a culture of acceptance towards trans people as a whole.

who cares if you hurt a few people along the way? either they're trans women, and actually you've done them a favor so any hurt feelings or harm is completely offset because now there's more trans women... or they're not trans women, and it's not like "the tmes" matter, unlike trans women. it's a win/win!

Yeah, but then they're like "oh so you think trans women are victimizing cis men" and it's like no bitch I just want you to be a little respectful of people's boundaries or at the very least stop saying "maybe you're actually a woman!" to transmascs because you got so excited you didn't check their bio.

I don't think there's any real practical effect towards "making more" trans women out of eggbreaking in any sense, and I don't think people who act this way believe that either. They just want the freedom to be annoying and treat it like a fandom or sports team.

[groundgritsarchive]

its funny because! duck never expected to save earth. that wasnt his calling, that wasnt the role he wanted to play, he wanted to be happy. he didnt want to know about syvane, he didnt want to fight its war, he didnt want to save their world, either. he didnt know about indrid, either, or george, but he saved them anyways, and he saved them all for eachother. he saved them for everyone but himself but more than anything for himself. to be happy and live the life he wanted, because he realized it wasnt about finding the life you wanted but making the life you wanted.

it doesnt seem fair that he didnt get to have it longer. (if you want to understand we are still accepting George art as an application to the discord server.)

[shoelace-and-friends]

The white, the yolk, just throw the whole bitch away! The shell is where the cronch is at, baby! 

[sugarsculls]

VALIDATION

[nyarados]

keith’s pokemonsona is a togepi

[scoobydoobway]

Eggs were never meant for human consumption. Y’all got GOT!

[velvetvexations]

I'm probably a little late to the party on "eggcourse", but something that's been rattling around in my head for a little while now about it is how the "egg" metaphor thing has something of a built in explanation for how the attitude of some people- that of insisting that "eggs" need to be cracked asap, and to do otherwise is being cruel to the transfemmes-to-be who are "eggs", and the like- is... more than a little flawed.

Because generally, the safest way to help something inside an egg to get outside its egg? Is to give it a comfortable environment and wait for it to crack its own shell from the inside, and carefully assist if it's struggling. Just breaking the egg open yourself is generally just going to result in a big mess, because you're likely putting the fetal thing inside in an environment it isn't yet equipped to handle- and it's very delicate and easy to irrevocably harm at that point.

It might be stretching the metaphor a little, I guess, but it's a little amusing how on-the-nose it is, really, when it comes to how to best handle "i think this person is trans" and the like. Aggressively treating someone as the identity you think they are tends to not be very pleasant for the people affected by it, compared to providing a non-judgemental environment where they can figure things out for themselves!

And that's to say nothing of the "I'm totally not bragging" smug vibe a bunch of these people exude about their weird inverse-transvestigation "accomplishments"- which frankly comes off as more than a little creepy to me.

people act like this means you simply don't want there to be more trans women in the world lmao

[velvetvexations]

honestly arguing that considering "egg prime directive" stuff important means "caring more about cis men than trans women in denial" kind of annoys me- for a lot of reasons!

but while the comfort of trans women in denial or in the closet and so on are things i feel like i see brought up fairly frequently (which makes sense, considering the way that those are the exact people who those criticising "egg prime directive" stuff claim they're trying to benefit), it seems like the exorsexist side of things aren't as frequently mentioned.

and this argument in specific comes with such a lack of consideration towards nonbinary people that it kind of pisses me off.

it's not even trying to be subtle about it- hypothetical eggs are either cis men or trans women in denial, in this framing.

so where are nonbinary people amab here? are they "just trans women in denial"? are nonbinary people basically close enough to binary that it doesn't matter to group them in with binary people? are they just completely unimportant relative to trans women? do nonbinary people not actually exist in this persons mind?

there's no answer here which is not at least somewhat exorsexist.

It's an entitlement to treating people how you want. No one criticizing forcefem jokes thinks trans women are literally trying to brainwash cis men, but the desire to put pressure on anyone who may possibly identify as the kinna person you want to fuck and personally feel is the ubermensch is stupidly selfish even before getting into how disrespectful it is to people who not, in fact, eggs.