#emberzrantz

[glowingemberz]

I've realized recently that "updates" to anything at this point bring me dread. Software updates, devices updates, getting a new "better" device, it all sucks ass now. It's always a roulette of what features they inanely decided to remove this time. Can't remember the last time i looked forward to an update. I hate capitalism. Stuff from 10 years is literally better than any shiny new release today.

[glowingemberz]

I've finally figured out how to articulate why technology sucks anymore. And by technology I mean phones and the Internet. It's technological heat death. The smart phone and the Internet were massive revolutionary changes and there were lots of things to innovate and improve within those areas for many many years. But now that technology is old. What else is there to do with the Internet and smart phones? There's nothing. The beast has run out of stuff to feed on so it feeds on itself. Everything is enshitifying because there's nothing else to do anymore, but those companies still have to make money so they push shitty updates that no one asks for. It's all stagnated, and it's rotting, and it all sucks now. And it will suck until there's another huge technological jump that provides companies with years of actual useful innovation.

[glowingemberz]

i know that not an inch of what im about to say is healthy. i dont want to live anymore. i will die alone, never anyones closest friend. My entire life has shown me that over and over. my friend has no idea what she just took from me, the one thing i was looking forward to in the future of maybe not being so alone anymore. i dont at all think she owed it to me, but it was the only thing i looked forward to in the future, and now thats gone too. i constantly tell myself im worthless as a defense mechanism to every time friends pick someone else, because of course they will, im not important enough to them, im just a small character in their life. i constantly tell myself that to soften the blow every time that decision is made. someone please just kill me, so long as you take care of my cat.

[glowingemberz]

My past and present littered with people who didn't/don't want to put in the effort to maintain friendship. Currently there's one person who initiates conversation with me.

You don't get to judge me for accepting attention from a toxic ex.

[glowingemberz]

SAY IT WITH ME: WE HATE MICROSOFT!!! WE HATE WINDOWS!!!!

I swear to fucking god they have a date board in the break room and each square has a fucking feature from a product and all these rich developers do all fucking day is throw darts at this fucking dart board to see what features they're going to delete for the next update jesus fucking christ I hate this trend of infantilization of all software the future looks like shiny big fucking baby toy buttons and it sucks and i want to burn everything down

[glowingemberz]

so I think I've finally realized that I just, don't work properly. I rarely have anything to say in any group I'm with, just a constant third wheel. Everyone else talks and talks and talks like it's no problem but I just, can never think of anything to say. Being around people having a conversation feels great, like I'm finally doing the whole socializing thing I'm supposed to be doing until i realize that, I'm not socializing, I can't, and then it always feels bad.

[glowingemberz]

It's cold and rainy outside and perfect staying inside all cozy weather but NO I have to go into work to slave away for capitalism so I can continue to afford my freedom to suffer

[glowingemberz]

MY CONTROVERSIAL HOT TAKE ON HDG!!!

Okay. I'm gonna put my opinion out there about the morals of HDG as if I am anything more than a nobody but here goes. A lot of people go "Yeah I love all these ideas in a fantasy kink setting but never in real life!!! Taking away agency is bad!!! It's actually slavery!!!" and stuff like this where the person judges the setting and the actions of the Compact based on human morals. I have MAJOR issues with this. It is the absolute HEIGHT of hubris to think that human morals THAT WE CAN'T EVEN AGREE ON are some fucking universal constant that are infallible and should apply to every other species out there. The amount of ego it takes to think that is insane. In the setting it is agreed upon by the majority of authors, JUST LIKE HUMAN MORALS IRL, that the Compact only takes away agency in the event the sophont is a danger to themself or others. Now at first glance this seems kinda bad yeah? The Affini taking away agency is bad because some dumb idea that free will is the best idea. We literally have laws to stop people from hurting others, and we peer pressure each other into taking care of themselves. Both of these things are outside influences to stop a person from hurting themselves or others. We literally do what the Affini do, just without the forever part of it, in most cases (hello life sentence?). And yet we can all agree that the way we do this is imperfect and sometimes downright harmful itself (see US prisons for just one example). So why not just let a theoretically perfect being do this to us perfectly? What is so wrong about letting the better version of this happen? Do you really think that untold billions of deaths of humans at the hands of free will humans is better than taking away the free will of some humans?? The counterargument to this is that in reality the Affini couldn't be perfect IRL because humans arent. Which again, is really dumb. Sure it's theoretically possible they aren't perfect, but why can't they be perfect either? Why assign a HUMAN norm, HUMAN understanding of HUMAN psychology to a COMPLETELY ALIEN SPECIES?? Again, this is a ridiculous amount of hubris to think that what applies to humans MUST apply to everything else alive. Now, I'll readily admit that it's EXTREMELY unlikely for the Affini to exist exactly as we describe them, or some equivalent species. BUT it is theoretically possible in my opinion. And if by some miracle that they do exist as we imagine them, I honestly think they are in the right here and should keep doing what they're doing. Ill happily take possibly losing my free will in exchange for us all to finally be safe and happy forever.