Match Review: Manchester City 1-2 Manchester United
Still think Pep's the best manager ever? ahahahahaha fuck off
Ahh, what a day that was.
On paper, it was a very even game - and not very high quality for 95% of it. 10 shots apiece, 3 on target apiece, 52-48% possession respectively, and 86-88% pass accuracy respectively. United had more fouls, setting themselves up to be more robust in challenges given we've been a bit lightweight, and City inevitably won more corners because... it's us.
One of these corners, played short, led to a looped cross landing on Gvardiol for a header and 1-0 City. Dalot was outjumped and outmuscled and it sucks, but it was almost inevitable.
United held firm though and it wasn't even a case of riding out the storm. It was a very even game. Haaland didn't start, Rashford and Garnacho weren't even in the squad, and it was just a bit weird.
In the first half there was a bit of argy bargy (thank fuck) where Walker bodyslams Hojlund out of the way when our forward's eyes are on the aerial ball and the City man... all on the striker. Proper shithouse foul, followed up by a bit of mano a mano and then some spectacular play-acting by Kyle Walker to collapse to the floor. VAR thankfully checked that Hojlund was indeed innocent, and as Roy Keane said after - that's hugely embarrassing to fake a foul like that. So much so that Rasmus rinsed the geezer on socials ahahaha rekt.
In the second half, more of the same from both sides but there was some controversy when Hojlund was fouled in the box and no penalty was given. Not to worry, late on our superstar Amad Diallo would do the same thing, but this time he'd ensure a penalty thanks to the awful tackling of ex-Wolves midfielder Matheus Nunes. Up steps Bruno, bosh, 1-1, game on.
115 seconds later (you couldn't write this shit) and a long ball from Lissandro Martinez would find the touch of Diallo who threaded himself perfectly between the centre-backs, dinks a touch over Ederson, and drifts with it wide left to hit an acute shot back across the goal and the three defending the line - megging one of them to give United the lead and the win. What a talent.
Frustratingly, we should be talking about how Manchester is Red, Pep's lost his fucking head, and City are a bunch of chancers who went from "four in a row" and "best ever" to... whatever this mystical dogshit run is. It's like they're playing on flat batteries.
No, instead the media's all over Rashford and Garnacho's absences - especially Marcus. Jack Grealish has done fuck all for City for a while now, and is a known party boy, but Marcus "has lifestyle issues" apparently and yeah, maybe more comes out this week, who knows, but you can't focus on one lad and not others. If he has got issues outside of football, I hope he gets help. Maybe leaving United and the people around him in the area would help him on that front. Who's to say.
He has my backing though (so long as he hasn't been a nonce or anything ofc - there are limits to loyalty) because of what he has given us to-date. He might not fit in now, but I'd hate to see him go on a low point. I'd like a player to stay a one-club man in this age of bouncing around.
Anyway, this is a good day, a good week, so lets not think about Marcus for now. Lets enjoy Amad doing an Uno reverse on Pep by approaching him at full time lmao.
Next up for United - League Cup quarter-final away against Spurs on Thursday at 8pm. We fucked it last time lads. Lets fix up this time, yeah? We could be on for some silverware here - really get Amorim's reign off to a good start. Prove that even mid-season and teaching a new tactic, with unideal players, he can win stuff.
