en-volution
I don’t know how to not lean in. Not.... envelop the experience and ask for second servings.
I’ve historically been shamed for my insistence on loving others. I am just here to take you as you are.
I wish I could be calm and collected but I know when I want someone. I am always so afraid of being abandoned after feelings have developed. I don’t want to be the person clinging to every small gesture you make. But I still am.
I look at you and see nothing wrong.
But there’s still so much I don’t know. All I keep thinking is how will I know if you want me as much as I want you. And why does it matter so much to me that you do?
Stomach aches. Head breaks. Drowning in doubt. Regrown cuticles. Tapping toes; And uncertainty growing on every extremity I have. Wishing I knew what was in the path ahead.