Hide and Seek | Self-Para
Ender had seen her. He’d seen her thin, fragile frame pacing along the empty hallway. He hadn’t meant to go up there, he had thought that he was supposed to make a left turn down the hallway past the stairs to get to his room but it only took a few steps down the dank and dark hallway for him to realize his room wouldn’t be there.
The hall was sucked of all life, there weren’t even any spiders walking about the corners of baseboards or along the webs woven between what seemed and felt like every corner. In his turning around his hand accidentally brushed a rusted doorknob and all the webs with it.
Furiously he swatted his hand and whipped off a bundle of webs, the thin, sticky threads airily floating to the floor. He knew it wasn’t his hall, yet he still moved onward. There was something about the hall that had him mesmerized and nervous all at once. He knew it was bright outside, his eyes still burned from his walk home from class where the sun blared down upon them, yet none of that light entered the halls. If he hadn’t known any better, he would have thought it was the dead of the night.
“H-Hello?” he called out to no one in particular, his voice bouncing from one end of the hall to the other. His hand grabbed one of the doorknobs but he drew his hand back. As curious as he was he silently reminded himself it’d be impolite to hop into any room as he pleased. Instead he knocked and waited even though he knew there couldn’t have been anyone inside.
With no answer, he stepped forward. Every room within the hall was shut except for one. He hesitated outside of the frame. He shouldn’t look in, it wasn’t his place to, but it was quiet there. It was nice there. He had been looking for somewhere quiet where he could practice on his own. Ender took a deep breath and hesitantly rounded the corner.
There she was. Clove.
His heart sunk to the floor. His brows lifted, his eyes widened, and it took everything in him to keep still, torn between breaking down right then and there or crossing the room and pulling her into his arms. The last time he’d seen her…The last time he’d seen her was outside of the woods when he heard all the sirens, saw all the lights, spotted all the paramedics running to and from a broken up frame amongst the leaves before bundling her, his girl, into a body bag. But the last time he had really seen her was in his bedroom. The day before she was sad that she couldn’t see the stars from where they lived so he painted his whole ceiling like the night sky. He’d spent hours making sure he had it right, Ursa Major, Andromeda – everything. He even made sure that Cassiopeia was clinging onto her tilted throne. The last he’d really seen of her he’d seen the stars reflected in her eyes and Clove had told him how beautiful the stars looked but she didn’t get to see them like he did – she didn’t get to see them in her eyes. He thought it was such a shame she’d never get to see the stars like that so he snapped a photo of her and the two slept next to one another.
That was the last time he’d seen her moving, until the empty room within the abandoned hallway.
Her full lips were curved downward, her eyes lidded with loneliness, and all the while he couldn’t help himself but want to pull her into his arms and show her those stars again. She wasn’t looking at him like she normally did. Her eyes were glued out a window towards a wrought iron fence, her dark hair falling in tousles past her shoulder blades. He knew it wasn’t her. It wasn’t possible to be completely her. Ender had grown up with plenty of ghosts walking in and out of his bedroom to know that Clove wasn’t necessarily Clove…but she was still his, and he was forever hers. Yet she wasn’t looking at him.
“…C-Clove?” he whispered, too low to be heard. The waver in his voice broke the silence only for himself. Clove didn’t move. His entire world contained within that fragile frame kept still.
Ender furrowed his brows and his eyes dropped to the ground. When he lifted his eyes to her, she was gone. He stepped into the room and looked all around. He always liked playing games with him, ever since they were little kids. He used to get mad at her for never letting him win at hide and seek but she never made it any easier on him.
Hesitantly he slowly dropped to the floor, crossing his legs as he watched out the window to where her starless eyes were fixed upon.
“Clove…” he whispered into the air. “…Get out of where I can’t follow.”
Ender had stayed there the entire day, the entire night, and the following morning. No matter the time, the light never hit him and he kept in the dark, in the quiet. He rose to his feet, bleary eyed as he brushed the dust off his jeans. He walked down the hall, back onto the stairs, and back to his bedroom.
She’d let him find her, someday.
