Let me begin by saying this is a difficult subject for me both personally and to address from the standpoint of having a service dog. Because everyone with a service dog has one for a different reason and every child will react differently to it, it’s hard to say what to do exactly when it comes to children. Let’s assume incompetency on the part of the parents and no matter what you try to do to explain to the child why they can’t pet the “doggy,” they won’t listen. For someone who struggles with PTSD, anger, or social interaction, this can be a disaster. Things can escalate really quickly, and it really isn’t fair that “no” isn’t a good enough answer. I hate that.
I don’t struggle with any of these. I have epilepsy. I feel like because I can, it is important to education those who aren’t informed. I live in a small(ish) town in the southeastern United States where most people have never heard of an assistance dog. Most adults are genuinely curious about Earl and happy to talk about him. Children are not typically so excited about being told no. Most parents are even less excited about their children being told no.
The other day I ran into a coworker and his family. He had met Earl and knew not to distract him while working. I had never met his six-year-old daughter. She was so excited about meeting Earl- too excited. She got in his face and pet him on the head. I was somewhat surprised that my coworker did nothing to stop it. I bent down to her level to say, “I’m sorry, sweetie. We can’t pet him right now because....” I stood to continue speaking to my friend and she grabbed his neck and hugged him. He again did nothing to stop it. My eyes darted back and forth between him and his daughter for a second before I had to step in again. As I bent over, she kicked her feet out from under her and dragged Earl by the neck to the ground. I panicked and grabbed her and took her away from Earl who had gotten to his feet and was backing away. My coworker took his daughter’s arm and said, “Please don’t handle my daughter like that.” Dumbstruck, I fumbled over some words to try to explain myself but decided to just walk away from the little girl who was making another go at my dog.
Like I said, there’s no good answer for a situation like this regardless of your disability. It’s an issue of respect. All I have in the way of advice is this:
What I just discussed is an issue of respect. Don’t tolerate that. You’re a human and they owe you the same respect they think they deserve.
Be aware that children are volatile. Just be aware of them and try to be gentle but be willing to remove yourself from a dangerous situation.
If people do treat you and your service dog poorly, you are completely in your right to defend yourself. I believe the best way to do that is to be firm with them and walk away if necessary. Typically it isn’t worth getting in a screaming match.
We have to try to educate the parents and hope they extend that knowledge to their children.
I want to leave us on a positive note. Last Sunday I had a boy come to me and tell me he knew I had a service dog and he wasn’t going to touch it. He asked me questions about Earl and talked about his dog for a while and left. Some kids are still pretty cool.
