girl + earl

Life With A Service Dog

[girlandearl]

My friends!

Our absence has been a result of a trip to Europe. Forgive us. I am working on a few posts regarding preparation for travel, what our trip was like, laws for “assistance days”, etc. Don’t worry. I’m going to bombard you with stories.

[girlandearl]

Earl Servicedog, Ph.D.

Last weekend Earl went to his “graduation.” Every year, the organization who trains and places the dogs has a graduation event where they introduce the dogs and a few of the recipients to give the public an idea of what they do and what service dogs are capable of. A couple local news stations come to cover the event. It was actually a fun weekend. 

It was a little uncomfortable at some points. Earl spent some time with MOST of the trainers/puppy raisers and they were all thrilled to see him. I was surprised however, when the very people who tell the recipients not to let anyone pet the dogs on duty rolled around on the floor with him. It was especially frustrating when Earl had to pass his public access test. If he failed the test, he would have to be taken from me to go back to the training facility for a few months. He is nearly perfect for me, but 5 minutes prior to the test, one of the trainers was playing with him and he was really distracted. I had to (nicely) ask her to go somewhere else so he could focus. He passed. 

I was so unsure how to deal with it. It wasn’t just Earl. Thankfully there were several amazing girls there around my age who felt as uncomfortable as I did. When the trainers invited the audience to come play with the dogs at the end of the presentation, we decided to leave. They are usually professional. Thankfully this event only happens once a year. 

I’m still unsure what I should have done, but I guess all I can do is continue dealing with most people who try to pet Earl while he’s on duty: scream at the and spit in their face (<- kidding). The best advice I have for this is that sometimes it isn’t always black and white how you should handle situations regarding your service dog. You just have ultimately do what’s in your best interest. It’s not selfish- it’s a matter of security. 

[girlandearl]

Earl is taking San Fran by storm. The Golden Gate Bridge is supposed to be in the background in the last picture, but Earl’s triangles got in the way. 

[girlandearl]

Earl the Jetsetter

Walking into the airport was a bit frightening. Armed with a folder containing the laws regarding my rights to a service dog, my booking number along with emails verifying my correspondence with the airline about Earl, and a doctor’s note confirming my epilepsy, we approached the ticket counter. The surly man who checked our luggage asked me all the appropriate questions about Earl followed by asking if I had “service animal” put on my boarding pass. There was a little mix up, but it was an easy fix. I won’t bore my readers with the details. 

Security was the next hurdle. I was unsure what to expect because every airport does it a little differently. We were escorted to a different metal detector  that we both walked through and I had my hands scanned with a little wand. I know that “little wand” is really helpful, but I don’t know what it was or what it did. It tickled, but I don’t think that was it’s intended purpose. TSA was nice. They really weren’t a problem at all. 

I still held my folder close to my chest. I read so many horror stories prior to flying about dealing with the airport and I still had to check in with the airline at our gate. We flew with Southwest and they don’t assign seats, so everyone has to get their boarding passes a the gate. Earl and I actually got cleared pre-board and got bulkhead seating without a problem. I was somewhat in disbelief that we encountered no major problems.

The staff on the plane was amazing. They all wanted to talk about my service dog and were both professional and exceptionally complimentary. I have no ties to Southwest airlines and do not receive any reimbursement for gushing about them. Typically I just fly whatever is cheapest. I will probably continue to choose the cheapest flights, but I rather enjoyed my experience with them. 

Earl handled the plane like a champ. He gets motion sick, so he took some Dramamine before the flight. The biggest issue he had was crossing the threshold into the plane. He could see the ground and looked at me like, “We are REALLY high up and I can see concrete below. This is not okay.” He didn’t die like he thought might happen if he stepped over the small crack. He’s cool.

We still have to fly back but I am not a apprehensive as I was before our first flight. Are you ready? It’s ADVICE IN THE FORM OF A BULLETED LIST TIME!

When flying with a service dog:

Be prepared to deal with confrontation. I had no problems, but you want to have as much artillery in your arsenal as possible. You’re traveling within your rights, but it doesn’t hurt. I have a doctor’s note saying I have epilepsy to confirm my need for a service dog on his letterhead and  highlighted laws regarding air travel from different sources.

48 hours prior to flying, confirm with the airline you’ll be traveling with your service dog by calling their 1(800) number. This will also help you get the best seating for your dog. Most airlines will do their best to be accommodating.

Arrive 1 1/2 - 2 hours early to the airport to avoid missing your flight because of unexpected trouble.

Bring your vest. Again, legally you don’t HAVE to, but it’s best to avoid confrontation. Actually, flying is somewhat outside of the ADA jurisdiction and your airline CAN require that you have some identification whether it’s a tag, a vest, or a doctor’s note. I can’t remember where I saw that, but I read it somewhere. 

Try to get bulkhead seating. It gives you guys a little more room. Flying isn’t the most comfortable thing anyway. You don’t want to have to cram your dog into an aisle. 

I pet Earl and tried to comfort him during takeoff and landing. He didn’t need me to, but because it was his first flight I wanted it the be as pleasant as possible. 

Here are some sources that might help if you have any more questions:

http://servicedogcentral.org/content/ESA-flying

https://www.tsa.gov/traveler-information/passengers-service-dogs

http://www.iaadp.org/airline.html

http://traveltips.usatoday.com/rules-flying-service-dog-103409.html

[girlandearl]

Enjoy the best photography you'll ever see. Here we go! First plane ride!

[girlandearl]

Today we leave for San Fransisco!

Today Earl will be flying for the first time. Wish us luck!

[girlandearl]

[girlandearl]

My baby is sometimes.... a big baby.

   Yes, I call my service dog my baby. He’s my partner in crime, my biggest fan, and my watchful protector. He is also my baby. When I go to the bathroom alone or take out the garbage without him, he cries. He growls when he is afraid for my safety and takes care of me when I fall. He is also afraid of balloons and flags. 

   Quite frankly, he is nearly perfect when on duty. People always remark on how well behaved Earl is and how they need me to come train their dog (or their children). He is quiet, obedient, and calm when in his vest. Even on his bad days he listens to his commands but might groan in protest. It seems to make him even more charming to others. This weekend, however, Earl got scared and I had to take care of him.

   My husband, Earl and I went to Chattanooga, TN for the weekend. It was incredible and Earl was a model service dog. There were some new things we had to figure out. There is a glass bridge on the way to the art museum that was intimidating, but we overcame that hurdle. Earl got to visit a Monet exhibit. We captivated the attention of the security guards, but I don’t blame them. We saw a movie and ate so much good food. 

   Then we went to the Aquarium. 

   The Chattanooga Aquarium was phenomenal. If you ever find yourself in Chattanooga I highly recommend visiting. Earl enjoyed himself too. Surprisingly, the shark tank was one of his favorites. It took some adjusting at first, but he quickly acclimated. When we reached the otter exhibit, however, he became uneasy. The tank was kind of open and you can see the water sloshing about. I think it freaked him out that he saw the water, but wasn’t wet. he couldn’t quite understand that. When an otter dived in, Earl started whimpering and tried to hide behind me. I bent down and held him like I would a small child to comfort him. It was better, but he was clearly upset. I was really enjoying the otter tank, but I had to make the choice to remove Earl from an uncomfortable situation. We took a time out to relax and went on our way.

   I hate to say it, but Earl was adorable when hiding from the otters. I know he was scared, but he was acting like a small child.... like a baby.

   I have mentioned making sacrifices before for your service dogs, but it’s just a part of having one. You’re best buddies. Any relationship worth having is about making sacrifices for one another even if it’s a really small one like this one. Once you’ve been working together for a while, it doesn’t even register that you’re giving up something. You take care of each other. It’s pretty simple.

[girlandearl]

My apologies for the hiatus.

Life gets busy sometimes. Also I had writer’s block (or something like that) for a bit. Luckily it gave us some time to go on adventures. Going back to work on a post now.....

[girlandearl]

Today I learned some obvious information about training.

To my chagrin, I found out I was handling Earl’s training all wrong. 

I did not train Earl myself. I applied through a government funded organization for a service dog a little over a year ago and Earl was placed with me very recently. I’ve always had dogs and could teach them basic tricks, but as we all know service dogs are a different story. When we met someone with the agency to do the handoff, we did very minimal training and were told we would do a more extensive training session in about a month. Well, that never happened, and things didn’t seem to be progressing like they were supposed to.

Earl’s obedience was on the decline. He had trouble focusing. He was bored and grumpy despite working everyday and going on daily walks. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. I thought maybe he just didn’t like being a service dog or that maybe we weren’t a good match... and I was devastated. I had grown to love him and was reluctant to contact the agency fearing they would tell me Earl wasn’t going to work out. I had to remove my heart from the situation to realize I need Earl because he is a service dog. I needed him to do his job.

I emailed the agency and was given the phone number to the head trainer. I didn’t hide my emotions well. Thankfully, she was helpful and encouraging. She asked me what was going on and how I dealt with them. She sweetly corrected my missteps and gave me training tips to get him back on track. This information is not pertinent to anyone with a seasoned service dog or to someone who trained their own, but hopefully it’ll help those of you with a new companion or who are in the process of training.

My newly garnered information:

Most service dogs are both smarter than the average pup and come with an excess of commands. Exercise those commands daily. It’s like having a desk job as a human. At the end of the day, you haven’t been physically active most of the day, but you’re exhausted. Otherwise they get terribly bored and not be as eager to work for you when they have to.

I didn’t know that I had to keep a high pitched voice to encourage him when training. I was allowing myself to get frustrated and would drop the pitch of my voice. Doing that makes him less excited (or even nervous) about performing. I practiced doing this for about 20 minutes with him and saw a MASSIVE improvement.

If you are having issues with focus with your newly placed dog, I encourage you to contact the company that trained your dog for you. They might be able to figure out what’s going on and give you exercises to help him or her bond to you more quickly and get refocused on you. 

It definitely takes more than thirty days to imprint. According to the trainer it can take up to six months. Keep that in mind when it feels like you should be more bonded than you are.

Still be patient. It’ll keep getting better.The trainer kept talking about how working with a dog is like interactive with children in many ways. They aren’t going to be perfect, but they’ll be more eager when you work with them the right way.

Like I said, this in formation is probably obvious to most of you, but I want it out there for someone like me who is just clueless about dog training and discouraged about expected results. 

[girlandearl]

Just checking. Doing okay, mom?

*Having only text posts would be boring. I’m going to sprinkle a few pictures here and there to keep things interesting. 

[girlandearl]

Do you really need a service dog?

This is a post predominantly for the people with invisible illnesses, but I suppose can extend to anyone with unsupportive people in their lives. You encounter a great deal of opposition to your service dog when people can’t see disability from both strangers and people close to you.

Making the decision to get a service dog takes so much time and consideration. We all know the questions we ask ourselves:

Can I handle the attention is public?

Is it worth packing him up and taking him everywhere?

Am I willing to make the sacrifices it takes to have a service dog and adopt a new normal?

Will it be a net positive for me

What will my friends and family say?

.......

That last question is a kicker.

When I chose to apply for Earl, my genteel Southern family exploded. The best way I can recount their reactions to hearing the news is through another of my beloved bulleted lists:

“Okay.... Well...... What do you want me to say?”

“So you’re just giving up on getting better?”

“Don’t you want to be normal?”

“You’re being selfish. There are people in worse shape than you who need service dogs.”

“You’re just exaggerating your seizures so you can take a dog everywhere.”

“Just keep trying to get better and get a normal dog.”

“Are you still talking about getting a service dog? I thought we talked you out of that months ago.”

The list goes on. They even called the agency after I put in the application with two references and a doctor’s note confirming my disability to tell them I didn’t need a service dog. Just a side note- I’m 24. They’ve grown to love Earl, but still pet him when he’s vested and make comments like, “Oh, you brought your dog again.”

Even my supportive friends didn’t act the same for a while. Until they adjusted, it was a little lonely. Conversation was strained and brief. I became reclusive. Then I got creative. I started using social media and texting for interaction for a while with the people I was closest to. Then would meet them for a meal or coffee because Earl sleeps quietly under the table at restaurants. People forget he’s there. It felt like old times and it helped them realized I am the same person I was before Earl came along. 

*That was long. Sorry about that. Here’s the advice part (another bulleted list): 

Your service dog is for YOU. Be okay with and unapologetic about that.

Try to help the people you love understand and be prepared for them not to.

When trying to reconnect with people who may feel uneasy about your new “buddy,” Try to hang out with them and at all costs try to avoid talking about your illness for a while. They care, but it’s a good reminder that you’re the same person you were before. They probably miss you as much as you miss them.

Try to be comfortable in your own skin. Remind yourself that you’re not defined by your illness. You just need a little extra help. You’ll exude that confidence and people will be more at ease around you and your service dog.

[girlandearl]

Earl likes good kids and not holding still for pictures.

[girlandearl]

Children

Oh my god.... children. 

Let me begin by saying this is a difficult subject for me both personally and to address from the standpoint of having a service dog. Because everyone with a service dog has one for a different reason and every child will react differently to it, it’s hard to say what to do exactly when it comes to children. Let’s assume incompetency on the part of the parents and no matter what you try to do to explain to the child why they can’t pet the “doggy,” they won’t listen. For someone who struggles with PTSD, anger, or social interaction, this can be a disaster. Things can escalate really quickly, and it really isn’t fair that “no” isn’t a good enough answer. I hate that.

I don’t struggle with any of these. I have epilepsy. I feel like because I can, it is important to education those who aren’t informed. I live in a small(ish) town in the southeastern United States where most people have never heard of an assistance dog. Most adults are genuinely curious about Earl and happy to talk about him. Children are not typically so excited about being told no. Most parents are even less excited about their children being told no. 

The other day I ran into a coworker and his family. He had met Earl and knew not to distract him while working. I had never met his six-year-old daughter. She was so excited about meeting Earl- too excited. She got in his face and pet him on the head. I was somewhat surprised that my coworker did nothing to stop it. I bent down to her level to say, “I’m sorry, sweetie. We can’t pet him right now because....” I stood to continue speaking to my friend and she grabbed his neck and hugged him. He again did nothing to stop it. My eyes darted back and forth between him and his daughter for a second before I had to step in again. As I bent over, she kicked her feet out from under her and dragged Earl by the neck to the ground. I panicked and grabbed her and took her away from Earl who had gotten to his feet and was backing away. My coworker took his daughter’s arm and said, “Please don’t handle my daughter like that.” Dumbstruck, I fumbled over some words to try to explain myself but decided to just walk away from the little girl who was making another go at my dog. 

Like I said, there’s no good answer for a situation like this regardless of your disability. It’s an issue of respect. All I have in the way of advice is this:

What I just discussed is an issue of respect. Don’t tolerate that. You’re a human and they owe you the same respect they think they deserve.

Be aware that children are volatile. Just be aware of them and try to be gentle but be willing to remove yourself from a dangerous situation.

If people do treat you and your service dog poorly, you are completely in your right to defend yourself. I believe the best way to do that is to be firm with them and walk away if necessary. Typically it isn’t worth getting in a screaming match. 

We have to try to educate the parents and hope they extend that knowledge to their children.

I want to leave us on a positive note. Last Sunday I had a boy come to me and tell me he knew I had a service dog and he wasn’t going to touch it. He asked me questions about Earl and talked about his dog for a while and left. Some kids are still pretty cool.

[girlandearl]

We’re hard at work. We’ll post more soon.

[girlandearl]

Some people just don’t like dogs.

Every owner of a service dog should expect some confrontation regarding their “pet” at some point. Most of these encounters are with people who just aren’t educated about what an assistance dog is. It sucks when it happens, but you’re pretty safe when you do have these conflicts. You are not only protected by law, but more than likely surrounded by people who ARE informed and will help defend you. 

Then there are the people who respect you and understand the laws who... just don’t like dogs. This is one thing that took me a bit longer to adjust to. Some people you’ve spent a fair amount of time with might start treating you a little differently. They might not spend as much time talking to you. They might start intentionally sitting far away from you. You might catch them grimacing when they don’t think you’re looking and have an awkward moment when your eyes meet and they try to fake a smile. 

Okay, I’m getting a little anecdotal with that last sentence. When I offered for a friend to pet Earl when he was out of uniform, she said, “Oh, no thank you. I don’t feel led.” That was the moment I realized I couldn’t take it personally when people started being more distant. She is still my friend, but I have to respect her just like she respects me and not be angry when she doesn’t want to be near Earl. 

Thankfully, most people can’t keep their hands off him. I suppose that is a different issue, but there is a certain pride that comes along with people fawning over him. He is pretty cute, after all.

[girlandearl]

Earl with his handler before placement. 

Patience is imperative.