Here I am
Damn this year is something.
Here I am. A stranger sitting in a small cafe, the only person they need to serve. Who knows what would happend? Some more random person might come. They sit and order some coffee. They talk and laugh about anything.
And here I am. A stranger sitting in a small cafe, struggling with things that has nothing to do with my thesis. The other things is too distracting. The stomach that love to release more acid whenever I panic. The tumor that had been taken out but somehow I still feel it there. The baby that can’t live with my sister, who needs to finish her study and works simultaneously.
It is 15.05 right now. He must be in line for his interview. I hope that he can get this job. He needs something to do to fill his free time. Having a bachelor degree doesn’t mean anything now. You’ve got to be a better person all the time. you’ve got to struggle with the other to get a job. With someone that has a better degree than you.
If they only needs an engineer, they are not supposed to create an english major. If they do needs a littérateur, well, do the world need them? Need us?
The lecturer of English major would say “We are needed by this world! Who will know what does Shakespeare means in this drama? What does Poe imply in his words? What are Bradbury trying to tell to this world that keep trying to send everything in to a modernization?
But, they need someone who can calculate the tax. They need someone who can persuade people to join their bank. They need someone who can sell these products, dozens of them. They needs someone who can operate these machines that can build more tall building.
After all, we just didn’t try hard enough, they said. There are more probability for us out there, they said. We can sail gracefully out there where they will need us, they said.
And, here I am. I just didn’t try hard enough.
Here I am, sipping my cold latte.