Engineer!Jaune (Based on my ask to @howlingday) Ruby: YOU WHAT?!
Jaune: Yeah, just like my Uncle Dell Conagher-Arc said: “Hey look, buddy. I'm an engineer — that means I solve problems. Not problems like 'What is beauty?' because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems.”
Ruby: BUT YOU DELIBERATELY CUT YOUR OWN ARM!!!
Jaune: Yeah? So did my uncle
Ruby: JAUNE!!!
Jaune: What?! It’s the only way to make sure Nora or you fires my Plasma guns!!!
Ruby: But you didn’t need to cut your own arm!!!
Yang: I heard screaming, what’s wrong?
Ruby: JAUNE CUT HIS OWN ARM!!!
Yang: WTF JAUNE?! I KNOW YOU’RE CRAZY AFTER ALL OF THIS 3 YEARS, BUT THIS IS TOO FAR!!!
Blake: Yang, honey, please don’t scream *Sees Jaune’s arm* What happened to your arm
Ruby: HE CUT HIS OWN ARM OFF!!!
Blake: WHAT?! PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING
Ruby: I’M NOT!!!
Weiss: WOULD ALL OF YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?! PLEASE STOP SCREAMING!!! *Spots Jaune’s arm* What happened to your arm?
Blake: He cut it himself
Weiss: YOU WHAT?! THAT IS PREPOSTEROUS!!!
Jaune: I did.
Weiss: ….
*Knocks on the door*
Jaune: Who is it? *Opens the door and sees Uncle Dell*
Ruby: Who is it Jaune?
Jaune: *Excited* It’s my uncle! Uncle Dell? What’s up!!!
Uncle Dell: Hey kid, heard you cut your own arm. Is it true?
Jaune:*In a slight Texan accent* I did
Uncle Dell: As i expected from a 10Y/O kid who obtained 11 PhDs
RWBY: He’s what?!
Uncle Dell: Yup, he sure did. *Speaks back to Jaune* Hey kid, who’s these fine ladies? Is one of them is your girlfriend?
Jaune: *Still in the same accent* No uncle, all of them are girlfriends and girlfriends. And one of them is in a polyamorous relationship. *Points to Ruby* That’s Ruby *Points to Weiss* Her girlfriend Weiss *Points to Blake and Yang* The emo one (Blake: HEY!) is Blake and the Yellow one is Yang. They’re the one whose on a polyamorous relationship.
Uncle Dell: With who?
Pyrrha: *In the door* Blake! Yang! Can you help me with my groceries please? *Sees Jaune* Jaune!!! *Proceed to run at full speed to hug Jaune*
Jaune: Whoa! *falls into his own back
Pyrrha: We’ve missed you so much!!!*Felt something metallic*… What happened to your arm Jaune?
Yang: *Helping Pyrrha with the groceries* He cut his own arm
Pyrrha: HE’S WHAT?!
Yang: That’s not even the most shocking part, he also got 11 PhDs.
Pyrrha: *Staring at Jaune and Dell talking to each other and seeing him gives an Australium to Jaune*…. No wonder he’s always the top in every class except combat.
*After helping the girls with the groceries, maybe around 5-10 minutes*
Jaune: Welp, We’ll talk later Uncle Dell, we’re going to have a cookout and those groceries won’t lift by themselves.
Uncle Dell: Yeah, we’ll talk later about the sentry improvements. Got a call from work. Y’know, the usual RED and BLU stuff.
Jaune: No problem uncle, how about we meet at our usual bar?
Uncle Dell: Sure thing bud, say the time and date and i’m on my way. With the rest of the crew ofcourse.
Jaune: Heavy still pissed at me for beating him in an arm wrestling huh?
Uncle Dell: I mean, you’d rarely sees a 15 Y/O kid beating a 6’5 400 Pounds man with Aura in arm wrestling contests. *Chuckle* Well i gotta go *Gets in his 1966 Chevy Pickup*
Jaune: Sure Uncle Dell. Be sure to not be dead
Uncle Dell: The machine’ll revive me kiddo *Dabs Jaune perfectly* Bye kid. *Drives off*
Jaune: *Chuckles* Bye uncle Dell! *Waves his metallic arm*
The girls: *Speaking together in a dark tone* You got some explaining to do. Jaune~.
Jaune: Oh… shit….