Dec 25, 2014
jess is tall n beautiful and funny n kind and wonderful i live jess so much
seen from Australia
seen from Germany
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from Japan
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from Russia
seen from China
seen from Australia
seen from Canada
seen from China
seen from Iraq
seen from China
seen from France
seen from China
jess is tall n beautiful and funny n kind and wonderful i live jess so much
auruo's family is big. parents and siblings and aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents and second cousins and great aunts and great uncles and third cousins and sometimes even just close friends. it's more warmth and love than erd could ever have thought could be shared between so many people. of course, this also means that holidays at the bossard household are more than a little chaotic. the sound of laughter and the smell of good food and it's hard to go anywhere without bumping shoulders with someone else. french is shouted across the room and over his head, words rapid-fire and beyond his grasp. auruo doesn't leave him, though, and erd knows he's watching him, keeping an eye out for when his smile gets strained and he starts to feel overwhelmed. it's that, even more than the coziness and the affection in auruo's mother's smile, that makes erd feel loved.
the first time auruo realizes that he's in love, his only thought is well, fuck.
erd's face is ducked against his neck, his cheeks and ears burning hot with embarrassment as he babble on about something. auruo's not really listening; he has his hands pressed flat against his shoulder blades, carefully measuring each breath, each nervous chuckle.
they'd fallen into a routine where erd would always come to him when he got upset and auruo would, inevitably, calm him down. every time it felt too intimate, to familiar, never mind that they'd been sleeping together for months. but that was sex, and this was... something else.
he should have run away a long time ago.
"i love you, you know."
"i know. but there are times when i won't believe it."
"then i'll make you believe it! i don't- i ain't gonna lie about this shit, erd."
the smile that begins at the corners of his lips is beatific, the barely-there lines around his mouth shifting into sharper relief. auruo can't help himself when he curls his fingers in the short hairs at the back of erd's neck, pulling the other man closer, bumping foreheads and breathing in deep.
he loves him, loves him so much that it hurts sometimes, hundreds of thousands of miles between them, his voice crackling faintly on the other end of the telephone. but auruo will take it. he'll take anything he can get, and he'll make the best of it.
the world goes on without him.
it's not fair, that the sun still shines and the birds still sing and everything is normal, the same as before, after he feels like his entire existence has been turned upside down. their room is empty, now, his clothes still on the floor where he left them, little trinkets on the dresser and his bedside table- his glasses, the cologne he used to hate, the library card he always forgot- reminders of his existence.
eventually, the blankets stop smelling like him and auruo doesn't cry anymore.
he wakes up to the smell of toast and coffee. it wouldn't have been so weird, except that he lived alone, which meant only one thing. auruo groans and pulls the pillow over his head, briefly considering the merit of smothering himself before he rolled out of bed. he hears humming as he approaches the kitchen, quiet and distant as if from far off, and he blinks hard and rubs his eyes as he rounds the corner. erd flickers into view, wearing the same tshirt and ratty jeans he has as long as auruo has known him, the clothes he died in. he's humming a tuneless little son, a repeating series of four or five notes, and auruo yawns as he settles himself at the table. he would have fallen asleep, if not for all the noise the poltergeist was making. the food he is presented with is barely edible. the toast if charred black on one side, and the coffee has creamer, which he can't stand. but erd's smile is so bright, so happy at being able to be normal again, that auruo eats it all anyway.
it's hard when they're apart. auruo worries, always- it's just who he is. he fidgets and paces and turns to say something to erd only to remember he's not there, closing his mouth with a pensive glare into empty space. it's terrifying, that he should have come to rely on another's presence so heavily, come to expect such a constant in his life. auruo hates being alone.
they like to make a game out of endearments. erd's are always sugary sweet, the words that fall from his mouth syrupy and dripping with affection that was only half feigned. auruo's are veiled as insults, but there's a warm note beneath every "dumbass", a secret smile curling the corners of his mouth. (the one who gets found out first loses.)