#erem irl

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there is nothing more me than waking up at 4 am to prep for a job interview at 10 am

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physically I am at my desk working, mentally I am sitting on some display furniture in a Walmart at 2 am waiting for my roommate to stop talking to a coworker we ran into, emotionally I’m half of a leftover burrito someone sat on in an Uber while drunk

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literally the only two consistent things in my brain are a low level amount of spite and the distant sound of You Can Call Me Al that’s been playing on loop in the background since 1999

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how’s everyone this Thursday I’m [inhuman shrieking]

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let’s play a game called “will I write tonight or just click endlessly through different social media sites and look at pictures of birds”

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Video: It’s easy to make your own pita at home! Me, twenty minutes later, with dough in my hair: I’m a competent adult

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Am I eating a pizza lunchable for breakfast six days before my 32nd birthday because I’ve lost control of my life and work is an actual hellscape this week?

Yes, absolutely.