Where’s the beginning?
Today is the first day for most of us. I would even say for all of us.
For example, today is the first day I write a blog post. I don’t have any formal training. I don’t really follow other bloggers. But today is the beginning of my life as a ‘blogger.’
Come to think of it, I’ve had many beginnings and as I think of it some more, I realize these are beginnings because I made them that way. The only beginning I have that was brought on to me was my birth (duh!) and the first day of every school year.
Beginnings are supposed to feel amazing. Well, I think people say that because that’s the expected emotion. But I often found that beginnings are scary and if you’re a structured person like myself, then you feel 150% like a fish out of water (you can’t breathe), because the unknown is killing you.
But when you remember what motivated you to start that beginning at that particular moment, you realize there is a hidden little person in you that is excited for this start. She (in my case since I’m a chick) is jumping on one leg and daydreaming 100 dreams per second.
Today, I was motivated by the simple fact that I want to be happy doing something that makes me happy. I’m happiest when I connect with people. I am happiest when I help others and I’m happiest when I create and feel accomplished and successful at what I aim for.
Lately I haven’t felt any of that – not even remotely close. I have been second-guessing myself, walking on eggshells and not being myself with anyone new I encounter. I also realize that I perform to the best of my ability when I feel I’m among friends. I’m not a transactional person.
Starting today, I will take you through the journey of each important beginning. I hope my highs and lows can help someone out there. I welcome feedback and comments.