Discover Top Posts Tagged with #except i lied

i kind of feel a sense of broad yearning for something greater, but like totally in the ironic and silly way. i swear i'm not like actually utilizing character depth or anyhting.

#i want a bagel #except i lied #i don't want a bagel

Wait, so you're okay with shit, but not f%#^ing?

Ian, judging me on my swear-word censorship.

#no context #except i lied #because there was context

Me and my friends' hear me outs/hold me backs are like:

White guy

Black woman

White guy

Emma Watson

White guy

The Onceler

White guy

#I have suuuucccchh a fat crush on ayo edebiri #none of us actually like the onceler like that but I said Ryan Ross kinda looked like onceler so we went with it #except I lied #one of likes the onceler like that because she's a FREAK #life of a teenage boy #life of a teenager #life of a teenage girl #text post #text

"Im super fly"

I say that a lot

Its basically my version of

"I'm fucking adorable/cool/awesome"

#except i lied #im manly as fuck #im not adorablle

pimpmastersouda replied to your post: if you let me talk to you about how much I love...

holy shit that’s a huge sacrifice

exactly, that's how much i love bluepulse

#except i lied #i have no dr. pepper left #pimpmastersouda #nightwing out

IS your name victoria?

#Anonymous #except i lied #my name is victoria #IS your name victoria?

Mom: I'm going to be late today.

Me: Uhh...ok.

Mom: Gyno.

Me: That's nice.

Mom: Y'know you have to go to the gynecologist when you turn 18.

Me: ...

Mom: Or whenever you become sexually active.

Me: ...

Mom: ...

Me: ...

Mom: ...

Me: I am the least sexually active person you will ever meet.

#this was our conversation this morning #except i lied

#except i lied

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