#exotic rambles

[exoticdox]

happy pride month yaaaaay!!!!!!!

[exoticuwuz]

Aiden's mental health is something I really really want to talk about but unfortunately, it's so unexplored so I can't at the moment unless they actually go into a deep-dive for DC5

Because man, has this show ruined him mentally than you think?

[exoticuwuz]

Ha...so about that, Aiden...

I firmly believe that he still views this game as a goddamn nightmare and the only reason he keeps coming back is because it's all he has. This show is the only way he can prove that he's worthy of something, that he's good enough for someone.

[exoticuwuz]

tragic realization that his face here at his DC5 "elimination":

is the same face he makes after admitting that being on the show was a nightmare...

this broke me as a woman...it's like everything from DC2 is coming back to him in one single sweep and I really hope they do more with his true feelings on being on the show.

And, something is telling me...he's definitely not okay as he appears to be.

[exoticuwuz]

this headcanon of Aiden having anxiety...becoming more real by the minute...oh we're not in headcanon land any more y'all...

[exoticuwuz]

So I was rewatching Episode 3 for editing purposes (yes I make edits and I only post them on my Instagram) and I found this frame...

Sorry for the bad quality but...did you notice that between the three, Aiden is the only one to not look at Emily? Why is that? Well, there could be numerous possibilities. It could be that he's worried that his plan (albeit not smart at all and an absolute All-Stars Aiden move) doesn't work...but that expression on his face doesn't really scream that.

So I have one in my mind...he feels bad for throwing Ernesto under the bus like that. I mean, why wouldn't he? He's seen that tactic before and it got Lake eliminated in All-Stars. We know Aiden and this type of ruthless gameplay causes him to feel pretty guilty, we saw it with Karol and how much that guilt consumed him. And based on his facial expression here and how he isn't looking at Emily, he seems to feel mildly-guilty for this move against Ernesto. If he continues down this path, who knows how badly the guilt will consume him?

Look, I may be worried and uncertain about how he's being handled right now but there's one proofreader that seems to have a good understanding of the character and I have a lot of faith in them.

And yes, about the finale confessional...I will be analyzing that eventually because man, did it break my heart?

[exoticuwuz]

So uh...everyone I want you to follow me on this idea I had in my head.

The reason why Aiden wants to be an actor so badly is because he's USED to it, used to pretending to be someone else that he knows he's not.

I mean think about it, he was in the closet for so long (he states that it was only until adulthood where he came out as trans in a greeting; not sure which greeting and hopefully, I'm able to find it) so he had to pretend to be someone he's not. Maybe he used acting as an outlet to stop hiding himself but even so, he still had to pretend whether he liked it or not.

He just convinces himself that he wants to be an actor for other reasons outside of that...but maybe, he'll come a realization and he can find his true passion.

[exoticuwuz]

not only do I feel like we were absolutely Aidenbaited but I feel like the writers of TomJake 2 absolutely HATE HIM.

I have my other issues with the spin-off because man...they could've just done a special episode where Tom and Jake get married.

Don't get me wrong, I love myself some angst (looks at DC2 Ep. 10) but...there was no reason to further explore these two characters at all.

Sorry if I sound absolutely negative but I had my issued since day one and they are never disappearing and please make Tom the first boot of DC5 (Gabby can follow suit).