What have I done to contribute to my own pain?
How do I forgive myself and move on?

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What have I done to contribute to my own pain?
How do I forgive myself and move on?
He's going to get married and it won't be to me. Not now, but it will happen. He'll have inspiration without fear.
I miss you.
I am alone and it's deeper than before
Your touch. Your lips. Your energy. Your faith. Your mind. Your heart. You.
I am alone.
I wished....
Even for the brieftest of time, to have my soul touched and reach the skies. My body an open vessel to One I trust, reminding me I was able to scale these corporeal walls and transcend to the orgasmic bliss of the stars. To be touched. To be usefully used within inches of breath. Cleared to land again in safety and mutual trust.
I wished....
To honor you with all that I am, worshipful, in the presence of a King. Hands, mouth, breast, skin, essence anointing in sacred flow. Not for what you give but who you are to me, in me, for me. I chose surrender as the finest of gifts, granted you access to my Kingdom. Who could say they'd been served by a Queen,l? Aye, THIS Queen? And with such thorough, open and merciless abandon for your pleasure.
Even if for the brieftest of times,
I wished....
| Seek Peace • Go In Peace | #EyeOfTy #TysThoughts #TysEmpathLife https://www.instagram.com/p/CJoRxJiFgw4/?igshid=59u7tvpi6e94
| Breonna Taylor | #JusticeForBreonnaTaylor #BreonnaTaylor #EyeOfTy https://www.instagram.com/p/CDYrj65JJHg/?igshid=15p79sa6yd9nz
Been slacking since early June, but I comes through! 😉 Thx for the encouragement and support, mamas. 🙏🏿 You are appreciated!! #ChallengeAccepted #BlessedBlackBklynBabe #EyeOfTy https://www.instagram.com/p/CDNOCW1p5L8/?igshid=sy7qs5usgy9w
| Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. | Early this morning, I was compelled to physically represent the work I'm doing to free myself from a particular hurt. I gathered, my iPad + what was once on my vision board and headed to the kitchen for my "release party." If you know me, you know I try to have a memory of most things and this was no different. I hit record, lit a piece of Palo Santo, placed it in a pot, and began adding each item to the flame. Total time - 9:28 I'd downloaded my video, starting the short editing process, when suddenly, my screen went dark and then....nothing. mean nan-thang! No record of this "letting go." No record of my acceptance. Not a damn thing!!! I wouldn't have my "binky" of the moment?! No monument to the symbols of "release"?!!? I wouldn't have something to show someone that I did the work! And I realized... The ash IS the memorial. THIS dust rightfully the symbol that remains of the particular situation. There should be nothing to show, nothing for ego. The ash is now part of the foundation/brick/mortar on which my legacies are built. What I'm building is the monument, not what was burned or left behind. This ash, this dust is a miniscule part of the life I've been given. Moreover, as I build, there will be no shrine comparing what I've let go to who I am and who I'm becoming. So ashes to ashes and dust to dust. They say, The Almighty gives and takes away 🤷🏾 I pray we all have strength to build on our ashes, regardless 🙏🏾 #TysThoughts #TysEmpathLife #EyeOfTy #ComingFewBetterThanLast2 https://www.instagram.com/p/CCASU7SJuQI/?igshid=z03uw92pblvu