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When you're failing the one class you're supposed to be "good at" so you pull out one of these

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I'm sorry mom,dad

So um ah idk …I ah just um got word that I’m failing my math I mean I’m not surprised cause I never went BUT not because I don’t like math or I didn’t care or because I was lazy it was because the one person the one person I trusted as a male best friend hurt me ,hurt me on a way that whenever I see them walking down the hall the hall goes dark I hear his voice saying thouse horrible things I smell the achcohol in his breath. I feel the burning pain between my legs and the urge to wanna scream and cry . But I don’t I didn’t I froze like a deer in the head lights I was in so much otter shock and disbelief that my brain shut down. So the hall goes dark my breath shortens my anxiety shoots threw the roof I relive thouse memories over and over until I feel them long gone they start to fade but they never go away. BUT what does that have to do with math you ask their there not even 3 desks away. They said NO They promised they wouldn’t put me in the same class as them. But they lied they lied like everyone else does.So my parents yell and tell me heartless things such as “your a disappointment” “get over it” “ your letting them win” “stop making excuses for yourself” “go to that class or else” so I did I went to that class for a endless 5 months this past month I’ve gone maybe three times. WHY? cause I can’t take it anymore I can’t handle the stress I can’t handle remembering that all the time I can’t stand to hear their voice. Going to that class feels like I’m being tortured mentally tortured my day is always less great no matter how happy or fun it is after I go there or see them walking down the hallway not because I’m being a drama queen No Because the amount of fear that builds up never really goes away it stays it lingers like an anxiety cloud.

I’m really sorry I needed to vent/rant this out ik I’m a disappointment to my parents and everyone.