Ships: Platonic Logicality; Platonic Analogical; Slight Romantic Logince
Warnings: Deceit mention; Platonic Logan & Deceit; Someone has high amounts of anxiety; Very minor cursing.
Summary: Logan has something that he needs to tell the other sides.
"Patton. May we talk? I think that I have something that I need to say." Logan's voice was steady and quiet. The door to Patton's room was open a crack.
"Of course Logic! What's on your mind," Patton said brightly. He made a spot for Logan on his bed and patted the seat to show while beckoning Logan to come in. Logan sat down and was quiet for a few minutes. He chose to do this individually. If he did it in a group, he risked not being heard and this was something that he had to say. He could go on keeping it a secret, but Deceit said that he could tell that Logan felt guilty and upset even if he claimed to be.
"It's-i-it's about my name. I think-no. I know that I would prefer Logan. Logic is still good but as for my non-titular name, I want it to be Logan," Logan stuttered. He looked down. He knew that Patton was supportive but it was terrifying to be open with someone, to tell someone something that you had been hiding for years, to stop lying to yourself and others.
"Of course! Whatever makes you happy. I want the best for you kiddo. Logan's a great name." Patton's smile was bright. He offered Logan a hug and Logan took him up on it. "Do you want me to use he/him too?"
"Y-yes please, um, Patton," Logan stumbled. "Patton, may I ask you something?"
"Anything you want, Logan!"
"You called me Logic before. May I ask why?"
Patton paused for a second, looked directly at Logan and put a hand on his shoulder.
"I could tell that you're old name was making you uncomfortable. You seemed to look a bit down or Low-gan when any of us said it. The last thing that I want is for any of my kiddos to feel uncomfortable. I thought that Logic might make you feel better," said Patton.
"Oh, well, thank you You don't know how much I appreciate this. I suppose that I have to tell the rest of them," Logan sighed.
"Only when you're ready. I'm rooting for you, kiddo." Patton smiled so brightly that it outshined the sun. For the first time a while, Logan smiled back.
A knock came from the other side of Virgil's door. Luckily Virgil had only one headphone on and could hear the knock.
"Yeah. Who's there," he shouted.
Logan froze. He wasn't sure what to say. This would certainly be a way to tell him, but this was where anxiety was and this was where anxiety would be heard.
"It's Logic," he said quickly. "May I come in?"
"Yeah totally. Shut the door, though."
Logan came in and immediately felt himself growing more anxious. Usually he had a few minutes before the anxiety set in, but in a situation like this it was instant.
Virgil sat up from his usual position of lying on his bed. Logan was standing, shifting his weight from foot to foot and looming everywhere but at Virgil. His heart felt as if it was going ninety miles per hour. His eyes had heavy black makeup under them. His breathing became shorter and faster. Luckily, Virgil noticed this.
"Oh shit. Maybe we should go to your room. Four seconds in. Just like you always say," Virgil said cooly. They sank out and rose again in Logan's room. A small weight felt lifted from his shoulders.
"Right. Thank you, Virgil. I suppose that if I don't say it, I never will. I want to be called Logan and I want to be referred to with he/him pronouns," he burst out.
Virgil just looked at him for second, probably because he was startled by the sudden bursting of emotion from the usually stoic logical side.
"Totally. Of course. Whatever you want, Logan," Virgil replied smoothly.
"Logic is fine but I do not want to be called my previous name."
"Got it. I'm proud of you. It's not easy telling someone something like that. I'm proud of you, L." Virgil gave a small smile. "So am I the last one to know?"
"No, that would be Roman. Thomas too, I suppose, but it's not necessary for me to tell him. As long as he knows that I'm male is enough."
"Wait you told Deceit before you told me?"
"Deceit deals with lies and secrets. He was bound to know first. He was the one to push me to tell all of you."
"What? Sure. Fine, I guess," said Virgil. "So, Roman. I think that he's in his room now if you want to talk to him now."
"I don't know if I can tell Roman. What if he thinks of me differently? What if he hates me? What if doesn't respect me anymore? What if-"
"Those sound like, what was it you said? Oh yeah, 'cognitive distortions.' Trust me, he won't think any of those things. Roman cares about you, Logan. Underneath all of that dramatic prince stuff, he's a pretty understanding and caring guy. I can go with you, if you want. You don't even have to do it now." Virgil put his hand on Logan's shoulder.
"No, no it's okay. I should be doing this by myself. He. He makes me feel...things," Logan murmered.
"Yeah, like aggravation," Virgil laughed. Then he looked at Logan and saw that he was not laughing and then he realized. "Oh...You mean...ah."
"Yes, and I'm worried about telling him. Maybe I shouldn't even bother. I can deal with being called the wrong name. It's fine," Logan rambled.
"It's not fine and I'm telling you that he'll understand a lot more than you think he will."
"Thank you, Virgil. You're support means an inordinate amount to me. Maybe I can figure this out in a few days."
"Totally. However long you need, Logan."
With that Logan left. He had someone to talk to. Roman's room was in between Virgil's and his. It wasn't far but it felt like forever as he walked over there. The outside of Roman's room would seem odd to a newcomer. It was a bright gold with red decals in the shape of something that seemed flowery. On it's left was Virgil's black door with stickers covering it from head to toe and even a couple of bouts of police tape to give it a special angsty feel. Next to Virgil's room was Patton's. Patton's door wouldn't seem out of place in a 1950s suburban home. One would almost expect to see a white picket fence and a fresh green lawn around it, but alas, there wasn't. Logan's room was adjacent to Roman's but on the other side. It was white, and interestingly enough was in the darkest part of this spot of the mindscape. It had one sticker that Virgil managed to convince Logan to put up; it was an erlenmeyer flask with smoke or another gas or something coming out of it. Logan looked at his door and stared at it. Luckily for Logan, it didn't need him to open up. Roman's head popped through with a large smile on his face.
"Can I ask you to keep it down a bit, teach? You're breathing a bit heavily and I've got a great idea for Thomas that needs some working," Roman grinned.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I suppose that I'll go," Logan said quickly.
"Are you alright? It can wait if you need something."
"You're busy and I don't want to disrupt you or be a bother or make you forget your idea. That wouldn't benefit Thomas at all and I should just be-." Roman cut him off.
"I think you should calm down and think this through. Come on, Lauren. You're Logic. Thinking is what you do best."
"You're right. I am Logic and I can do this. I suppose that it doesn't really matter where I do this, everyone else already knows."
"Knows what exactly?" Roman raised his eyebrow.
"Something that is very important to me. Something that Virgil said that you would understand. Something that has been difficult for me to come to terms with. Roman, I am Logan. I am Logic. I am male," Logan spit out. He began hyperventilating. His heart rate skyrocketed and his face grew red.
"First off, calm down. Deep breaths. It's okay," Roman said. Logan's breathing began to slow down. His shoulders began to rise and fall less rapidly. "And I just called you Lauren. I'm so sorry."
"It's not your fault. You didn't know. I kept it a secret."
"Well, Virgil was right. I do understand," he chuckled.
"What do you mean," Logan asked slowly.
"Well, I wasn't always the glorious Prince Roman that you see here. Some time ago I was Juliet."
Logan stared at him. He was in disbelief, relief, and something else he couldn't identify.
"Forgive me for staring. I-I didn't know," Logan stammered.
"I mean, how would you? I only told Virgil and Patton. Deceit sort of already knew because that's just who he is. I've never told Thomas, though." Roman could be hot-headed and dramatic. He could be loud and energetic, but there was a certain quiet and calmness that he could bring out sometimes.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Probably for the same reasons that you didn't tell me. We all work together, but we need each other to basically make sure Thomas stays alive. If we weren't on the same page or something, then that wouldn't work. I didn't want you to think differently of me."
"I kept thinking that there was something wrong with me for so long."
"We're trans, Logan. It's okay. There's nothing wrong with us," Roman smiled.
It took Roman handing him a tissue for Logan to realize that he was crying. This was odd. Even after the troubling day that he had, he didn't expect himself to cry and yet here he was. Things were different know, but they were better now. Logan knew that his family supported him.
Lissa’s Note: This was wonderful! I enjoy your style and how you write the relationship between the characters! I’m glad Logan’s Family supported him and I’m glad he gets to be himself. I particularly liked how you focused on individual relationships and a little on Lo’s relationship on himself when it comes to elf acceptance!
