#fatherless sons

[wessasaurus-rex]

Hey Wes. I remember sometime ago when you mentioned overcoming being fatherless to be where you are today. As someone who is also both fatherless and motherless, I just want to say how much I respect and appreciate you overcoming that difficult that. You may not know it, but there so many people who highly look up to you greatly. I'd just like to ask is there any advice or sayings you could give to all those being fatherless/motherless? I'm sure so many would love to hear from you.

Hey there anon. I’d just like to say thank you very much for those kind words about me being looked up too. Knowing that I can make one difference to someone in a positive and humble way gives me an amazing feeling.  There were times where I thought “Why wasn’t I good enough to be a son?” or  “If I’m not good enough for my own flesh and blood, how can I be good enough for anyone else?” At times i lacked had the emotional strength to press on, especially knowing how devastated/heartbroken i was when he told me he never want to be in my life at all.  I never really “overcame” being fatherless. I just managed to use it as motivation to never be the man, or lack thereof, the biologically deadbeat is.

My advice is don’t be afraid to talk about it to others. Never bottle it up. It’s okay to feel weak  at times and letting it out.  I’ve always hated the notion that humans can’t cry talking about these kinds of topics because the idea of lacking the right to express hurt, anger, and resentment is dehumanizing. People (especially men) are not robots. Everyone has a breaking point.

To any fatherless/motherless sons/daughters: I know you all may be enraged and filled with sorrow but you are all king/queen. A solider. A Warrior. The emotional pain will tear you apart, but remember that you are one of the strongest and toughest people walking on this planet.

Feel free if any of my followers would like to add more to it.

[wessasaurus-rex]

To any and all my followers who grew up fatherless or motherless 

I know you may be enraged or filled with sorrow, but you are a King. A Queen. A Soldier. An Amazing Warrior. The emotional pain will tear you apart at times, but remember you're one of the toughest people walking alive this day.

I'm damn proud of you all.

[hectortarot]

How to be a man while only being raised by a woman.

So for a while now I have listened to people discuss how boys need their fathers. I have been without my father for about 11 years or so. And I don't even know what that has done to me or meant for me, because my father (who is still alive btw) was not present before he had to leave my family, so I barely noticed he was gone.

So i have been asking myself, do boys really need a father because I was raised without one. IF ANYTHING, I would have wanted my father there so that my mother would not have been as angry and hurt, and treated me certain ways because of it.

and then I thought of something.

When talked about my future and possibly having my own kids (i'm gay, so there would hopefully be two male parents), I am aware of the fact that my parenting would be more motherly in away. Not because I feel men can be mothers, but because I really only know how to be mother-like. I have watched my mother and grandmother, and seen what they have done. (please i can't stand the idea of gender roles, so i feel in the household both partners should carry the weight equally).

and then it clicked.

THIS is why boys needs their fathers. I'm gay so maybe it is ok if I take a more traditionally more female role in my child's life, since there will be two male parents. But for heterosexual couples, it must be tough becoming a father and not having a solid idea of what that means.

And immediately an image came into my head. What if your son was in a school play, Romeo & Juliet, and he had to learn how to play Romeo only by Juliet's lines and actions in the play. That is to say, what a woman says about being a man, and how she reacts to him. And then tell him to perform it. He may get some things right, and he may get some things wrong, but at the end of the day, It would have been much better to learn to play Romeo by seeing and hearing and experiencing Romeo..... just thoughts.

Idk, most days I barely even knows what it means to be a man. Or should being a father mean something different than being a mother.

[uberfunn]

Wow. That Touched Me. Like That Was Really Unexpected.

Little boy responds with unexpected pain while being scared straight on the Jenny Jones show

[doingtimeoutside]

Tough Questions.

Life Class on OWN. Fatherless Sons & Single Mothers.

So many questions. Some are questions I need to ask myself.

Should you lie to your child about their father?

Should you make excuses why he's not there?

Is it your responsibility to protect your son from the truth of his life?

Does it turn into betrayal?

Should you say the hard things in a soft way?

[datzhott]

Oprah’s Life Class: ‘Daddyless Daughters’ to address plight of women with estranged fathers

When I interviewed Iyanla Vanzant for her OWN special Oprah’s Lifeclass: Fatherless Sons, I asked…

View Post

[learnlong]

OWN's 'Lifeclass' could take a lesson in educating adults

Watching “Lifeclass” on the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN) is a welcomed change from other shows, because it teaches what the true meaning of reality tv should be: About real problems with real people for real change.

While well intended, the lifeclass still…

View Post

[thechanelmuse]

What gets me is fathers act like they don't realize what they're doing to their sons, when it was already done to them.

Oprah's Life Class on "Fatherless Sons"