#fave <33

[yellowlikelemons]

its so fun!!!! and honestly "weirdo mean guy in 3 day old pajama pants smoking weed" is my EXACT type.... idk what it is but I see a man with a cloud of weed smoke and a horror movie on in the background and I get butterflies (<- I hate horror movies and get so so scared and can get wizard high off of eating 1/8th of a weed gunmy)... like hiiiii can I sit with you in my cutesy pink PJ set and slippers and be your ashtray😳💖💘💖 can you hold my hand during the scary parts of the movie😳💖💘can I smell my perfume mix with the smoke from your bong and then get so horny I almost pass out😳💖💘

Puff puff pass?🌱

Aww, come on... don't be such a baby, i'll teach you to sproperly smoke hash flower. It feels great, promise, it's why I'm so chill all the time. That and, uh, you know, the antipsychotics n shit. Prefer this though. I'm being real good with you, would much rather have you do this than booze, you know. Much healthier n won't make you feel like shit. Even got pink rolling papers! You like that shit, right?

Let's pick a movie... how about this new one, "Ugly Stepsister?" That's supposed to be a girl film. No, too gross? Skinamarink? Hm, wait, noo, that's probably a little too abstract... Oooh, I know! Swedish slasher "Konferensen." This one's real good, some old bitch gets fucking hung in a flagpole, there's a death involving a z-... I won't spoil it.

[yellowlikelemons]

Don’t worry puppy we’re gonna be doing this surgery at home. Now be a good pop and sit in the chair… I’m just gonna slowly open up this pretty skull of yours… oh? Did you moan when the bonesaw cut through your forehead? That’s adorable…

Now, just gotta take a few things out of this brain of yours, pet… this frontal lobe isn’t worth keeping… *slice*… neither is the speech center… *chop*… don’t know why we give pups such big brains… all you really need is this pretty brain stem to make your heart function.

Oh, right… that’s cute, pup, that you’re so worried about me killing you. Let me ease those fears real quick. *tears out the rest of your pretty brain by the brain stem to kill you in an instant and leave you drooling and stupid as a toy*

Feeling the knife slice trough the skin on my forehead makes my head tingle. It hurts, tears well up in my eyes, but I yip a little when the bonesaw comes out, the rattling in my skull somehow soothing. Blood runs down into my eyes, and I wipe it away along with the tears. The more you slice, the less pain I feel. It's euphoric in a way I've never felt before, the fear slowly dripping out of my body and being replaced with purring and gentle, calm happiness.

[yellowlikelemons]

I hope you don’t mind me using your brains for a while, pet. I’m just experimenting to see what makes you the most docile and pliable. I definitely don’t have a bunch of rich buyers bidding on the taste of a puppy’s mind right through those doors. Don’t worry, pup, I’m just gonna put this new collar on your brain stem…

You know, both these messages have felt like a stab in the chest. But it's a yellow, joyful, sweet and tingling feeling. I want to be your sugary, gentle puppy. I want you to tear out all the parts of me that makes me angry and snippy, the parts that makes me whine and cry when I don't get attention. You'll love me lobotomized, splayed out on your bed like a teddy bear in need of being hugged and loved. You might have to carry me or have me crawl when we need to go somewhere, but that'll be cute too, won't it? Little torn out puppys head running purely on instinct, curling up against your chest when you pick me up.

[yellowlikelemons]

How many times do you think we would need to bash that head into a brick wall until the person inside goes away.

Probably start off just hurting and bleeding into your eyes

Then at some point your skull will crack slightly

Have you ever wondered how it feels to have your brain deform when your skull fracures into chunks

Do you think youre still aware by the time your gray matter pours through the wound down your face

Imagine my little yips - getting louder at first with every crash, skin shredding over the coarse bricks. Blood would start to pearl on my lashed after a few hits. I'd inhale rapidly, the sharp pain from my wounds mixing with the dull throb behind my eyes. Gradually, my panic yells would turn into soft, resigned whimpers, too hurt and hazy to truly protest anymore. My skull would've caved in on itself, puss and gore spilling out where there once was a tattooed head. By now you'd hear nothing from me, hazy and with glossed over, half-lidded eyes. I know you wouldn't stop until squishy bits of brain were pouring out of me, sticking to my face and falling onto my clothes.

[yellowlikelemons]

You would be the sweetest little sacrificial lamb for the church. You’ve been so obedient. You’ve minded your mother well. And when it’s time to make your sacrifice I know you’ll let her lead you by the rope around your neck. The churchgoers will gather around you and rejoice. Such a good lamb! He dressed up every Sunday and said his prayers. He let his mother nurture him until he lost all his hard edges, his bad habits, and made him the perfect sacrifice. Thank you, lamb. This will only hurt for a moment.

It was hard at first, to give in. I resisted because it felt like what I was supposed to do, but those walls slowly came crashing down around me. Your voice, so soft and careful, guiding me gently to my rightful place, on my knees in front of the altar. (Both literal and metaphorical.) Your words coiled and twisted like a snake into my ear, assuring how lamb will be so much happier, sweeter, at peace. He just needs help from Mother, and the heavens, of course. Slowly, your readings out the bible became comforting lullabies, my nightly prayers a safe bedtime routine. I could feel you sanding me down, replacing my rough and tattered exterior with something more palatable, removing curses from my vocabulary. I look back on who I was and know that I should be terrified, but Mother's done me so well. I look to her one final time as I step up the church stage, rope just a little too tight around my neck. The cheerful audience gets a scared glance. My heart beats quicker. I should be calm, graceful, grateful, but even sacrificial lambs fear death...

[yellowlikelemons]

Hey sweetheart, wish I could be your butch dad that lets you get away with things just to see you get punished for it by your mommy. I think the look you’d give me while you’re being punished, knowing I’m part of the reason you’re in trouble would be so cute. I’d look at you in disappointment when you tried to plead to lessen your punishment, saying it’s my fault and that I told you to do something you weren’t supposed to.

Puppy just thinking youre trying to be a "cool dad" and win me over, starting to go to you more and more to ask for permission for the things I know Mommy doesn't want me doing... Yipping happily every time at how lenient you are with pup - handsome Dad pulling delighted chirps out my mouth when you let me eat excessive sugar, skip my daily walks, sleep in... Only to break down and whine, puppyish look of betrayal in my eyes when you don't tell Mommy not to cane me - Sniveling that it was your idea, Dad said I could! But shrinking down under your dissapointed gaze...

[that-pumpkinspicewhitegirl]

Happy New Year, Friend!!! Here's hoping 2016 just as great as (but hopefully better than) 2015. Ily <3

My darling!!! Happy New Year!! (I’ve still got about two hours, but I’m used to being behind the entire rest of the world, hahaha.) You are wonderful and fabulous and I am so so glad I met you, I can’t wait for 2016 to bring about even more fantastic things for us! ilyyyyyy<33