thinking about feathermedics (still) but one of the reasons hawkpaw first seeks out the odd little apprentice he bullied at the moonstone if because goosepaw is the only other medicine cat who has reacted to an encounter with starclan with fear.
hawkpaw knows he is supposed to feel awe and comfort and pride in these ancient, unknowable cats but, to him, they are only rows and rows of judging eyes, voices that have condemned him to a life he has no love for. chiveclaw refuses to engage in a discussion with hawkpaw about these feelings, he has made it clear that these kinds of thoughts are an unspeakable form of blasphemy. hawkpaw has resigned himself to suppressing his doubts, his frustrations, his fears-- he knows this will make the life he's been forced into simpler.
but then he sees the ragged, bug-eyed little apprentice-- a special apprentice, one who has been marked with a sign from starclan-- leap up from the ritual with a cry of terror and flee the moonstone without a second thought, hawkpaw feels a flicker of hope.
perhaps he isn't the only one who has been saddled with a sour, disappointing fate? and, perhaps, if a ritual at the moonstone can be broken, then there are other rules, other rites that can also be bent or discarded.
perhaps, there is hope for hawkpaw after all...
