#feelingsareshit

[ariesfirecvlt]

feelings can suck a dick

[jaane-x]

I feel like I'm going insane.

[jaane-x]

Trust issues

Trust. What does that even mean to you? Always accusing me and never listening to my side of the story. Who the fuck cares if “she’s” finished? Am I her? Do I do the same subjects as her? No.

I’m 19 not 10. I need a little freedom. For fucks sake.

Living with you is like living in prison. Constantly trapped in a place that makes me feel like shit.

Family my ass. How can we be a family of you don’t fucking trust me?

[jaane-x]

LEL pussy.

Call me a bitch. I don’t fucking care. I am one. There’s no point denying it. Just don’t say it behind my back and then suck up to me. I know you. Everyone’s the same. Fucking two-faced suck ups. That’s all you are. If I’m a bitch what does that make you? Huh? Takes one to know one right?

Wanna know why I’m a bitch? Makes it harder for back stabbing dicks like you to hurt me. I’ve been through enough to know that your words don’t mean shit to me and they never will. So get it through your head. I don’t care how cocky you are or how stubborn and conceited you are. Don’t fucking mess with me. 

[jaane-x]

I don’t want to be sad anymore. I don’t want to feel pain every time I hear your name in a conversation. I don’t want to miss you nor do I want to love you. I regret meeting you and if I could go back in time, I would. 

[jaane-x]

Who am I?

Well wouldn’t you like to know...

Honestly? I don’t know who I am anymore. One day I was a little girl who cared about nothing and never had a frown on her face. Now, I’m just sad and tired. Fake smiles everywhere I go. 

I know I’ve changed a lot, people tell me that shit every day. But do I care? Absolutely not. Why should I? People come and go, no one ever really stays. 

One word to describe me? Damaged. That’s what I’ve become and what I’ll always be. 

[jaane-x]

Over-fking-thinking. It kills.

It's always like this. Overthinking. Every single night. Always envious of those who can sleep straight away. Yet here I am, overthinking. What if I was happier? What if everything was different? What would happen if you saw me again? Would you realise how much you've hurt me? Or tell me how much you've missed me? Sighs. My brain is fried. My bed is soaked in tears. But who would know? They only see what I want them to see. They don't know anything. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Drained. That's what I am.

[jaane-x]

Vodka.

I wish drinking helped. But heck no, apparently I just have to remember everything anyway. The amount of times I've drowned myself in alcohol and nothing changes. Surprised I haven’t died yet. Sighs, wouldn't it be better if I did? He wouldn't care anyway so what’s the point. Fucking useless that’s what.