#fellatio mention

[zetsubonna]

lilacsandcarnations replied to your post “okay so this is totally inappropriate but a person in a fb group I...”

i want to meet a puerto rican grandma with an heirloom semen recipe now?

this was too funny to leave in the comments

[zetsubonna]

zetsubonna: i love that you liked that joke

runsquidling: Thanks for making it, I needed a laugh.

runsquidling: I'm going to be thinking about artisan semen man all day

zetsubonna: ARTISAN SEMEN MAN asklfjaksf

zetsubonna: he's a character now

runsquidling: he's only seen in December

zetsubonna: he spends the whole year drinking adequate amounts of water and eating only the sweetest fruits and mildest vegetables. he is vegan.

runsquidling: Somehow he's gotten rum into the equation

Nobody can figure out how but it's there

zetsubonna: there's cinnamon in it

nobody knows how

it's lightly spiced

runsquidling: Is he a new god of merriment? Or is he just a guy, dedicated to producing the best quality semen the body can make?

zetsubonna: i think he is just a man who has a craft that he takes pride in

runsquidling: Yeah, just a really dedicated man

I love him so much more now

zetsubonna: we salute you, artisan semen man. a true gentleman.

[zetsubonna]

feathasthekitten replied to your post: okay so this is totally inappropriate but a person...

Ugh. No. Eggnog is thick, but it’s creamy. Semen is SLIMY, it’s a totally different texture. I can drink eggnog just fine, I literally gag on semen and cannot swallow no matter how hard I try.

I think it’s ‘cause I never let it sit in my mouth long enough to be grossed out? Spit or swallow is entirely based on my mood, but if you’re gonna swallow, you don’t have to make a big deal about it and let it sit on your tongue like some hentai girl in a bukkake. You do it like a shot and keep mouthwash/water by the bed. ...Is that just me? I can’t do eggnog, but coquito is to be savored, it’s not the same thing at all.

[xmilitisx]

19

This was not one of the items on his bucket list, but holy shit could it be added.

Thankfully, the SUV they’ve chosen has a self-driving AI built into the dash, or they’d be in a fucking ditch by this point if they had to rely on his self-control. It’s not that he’s never had oral, or y’know- never had a mouth around his dick at all. It’s more the that the conversation had gone from the mundane and usual to a particular glint in mahogany eyes that never boded well for either one of them.

But, oh fuck if Stormy’s ideas weren’t usually worth it. 

Which is how he winds up with one hand on the high ridge of the door’s inner leather interior and the other hand stroking through inky black that separates like silk. After a moment, he cups it there- not forcing Hanzo at all, but caressing as much as he can. Despite all of this, it’s all he can do to not squirm- a scratch of nails against leather as the archer bobs his head again and again. A pale hand reaches to one side- helping him tug down the jeans a little more so that he’s more free.

A faint jump as he feels his balls cupped.

Christ. 

His head lolls back at the dual sensation of the texture of the callouses on his hands, and the hot silkiness of his mouth and throat. It’s intoxicating and it’s addicting. He has no idea how in the hell he’s gonna survive this, but as another swallow threatens to take him over the edge?

He’d sure as fuck like to find out.