Crossposted from AO3 account. Not bothering with the author’s notes that are on the original chapters I posted.
"Sorry, sorry, I just--"
"Stop laughing!"
"I'm sorry! Cloud is just... not very intimidating for a dragon, don't you think?" Zack covered his mouth, choking back the laughter before the dragon got really irritated and actually resorted to using fire to make his point. Said dragon--Cloud-- just glowered, huffing angrily down at the SOLDIER; once he was sure he was watching, the dragon very pointedly picked up Buster sword in his claws and used it as a toothpick.
"'Zack' is a terrible name for a princess," he began irritably. "So you have absolutely no place to be laughing at me!"
"Yeah, but I'm not a--"
"It's a terrible princess name," Cloud continued, completely ignoring Zack. "So I'm changing it, alright? From now on your name is... Is..." He paused, thinking. "Tifa!" he declared finally.
"But isn't that--"
"Exactly." Smugly Cloud dropped the Buster sword to the side, dropping his large head to get closer to Zack's eye level. "And she's very nice, you know. Brings me all sorts of tasty food to eat in return for not eating any of the villagers, and she'd make a nice princess, I think. But you're the one I'm stuck with, so I'll just call you Tifa too. Maybe you'll learn some manners if I do it often enough."
Somehow, Zack really doubted that was how things worked--maybe he'd ask Tifa to explain though. (He would prefer not to find out just how flammable his hair was, thanks.)