I need to lose weight. Dropping all these negative thoughts should do the trick✌️

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I need to lose weight. Dropping all these negative thoughts should do the trick✌️
Possible TW
I can't be trusted alone in my parents' home. I weighed myself yesterday. I told myself over and over that the number didn't bother me since it was lower than expected. . . But it does bother me. It always bothers me. I'm such an idiot
I need help and love and support and someone to take these feelings away. . . Or at least make them tolerable. I hate this.
I realize how dumb I sound when I say that I feel fat. Fat is not a feeling. It would be better for me to say that I see fat on my body which then leads me to feel ashamed, disgusted, disappointed, upset, and uncomfortable. But it is truly just so much easier to say that I feel fat. So I need to Find Another Thought.
Triggered. My counselor has a Facebook page and she posts inspirational things each day. Today was the benefits of exercise. So. Pissed. All I fucking want to do is exercise. So. Fucking. Over. This. P. S. Fat is not a feeling. FAT=Find Another Thought