sfw/nsfw hcs being flaco’s “pequeña esposa”? i’m so soft at the thought of being flaco’s wife bc i imagine he’s like john mulaney and will use any excuse to call you his wife if you’re married. i love the way you write him!
do you know how long i've been waiting for THIS request?? do you know how many headcanons i have about being Flaco's lady??? SO MANY. HERE U GO <3
Flaco gives me B I G Gomez Addams vibes; adores his wife, would do anything for her, dedicates his life to her, lusts after her every single day. Flaco fully devotes himself to you, because that's how women should be loved - that's how you should be loved.
Honestly, he started calling you his wife a few months after you two started dating, but not directly to your face.
He slipped up one day and said it by accident; Flaco made a passing comment to his men about you, "my wife should be coming up to see me this week!!!"
His men all looked at him with a grin, they know Flaco's just a big baby, but he'll never admit that to them. Needless to say, he brushed them off and went along with it, to the point that he now only ever refers to you as his wife.
Flaco really tried to hold back on proposing to you; he wanted to ensure you really want him, because we all know how that gunslinger doubts himself. He waited for just under two years until he finally burst and asked you, but he purchased your ring just after your one year anniversary, and has kept it safe in his inner coat pocket ever since.
He cried when you said yes, like full-on broke down and confessed that he's always been worried that he'd spend his final years alone, how he's so lucky to have you, all that good, mushy stuff.
And of course, Flaco cried so much at the wedding, so much at the honey moon. You had to pack extra handkerchiefs just so Flaco could use them.
He gawks over the ring on his finger all the time, and will sometimes take your hand in his just so he can look at your ring - it's as if he needs confirmation that yes, he has married you.
You once woke up in the middle of the night to find Flaco sat on the edge of the bed, feet on the floor, hunched over slightly. You shuffled about, wondering what he was doing, only to find that he was just staring at his ring. He does this often, you're just not always awake to see it.
Flaco also loves using you as a threat. He knows you're a tough cookie, and you won't hesitate to knock a bitch out, and Flaco lives to see it.
If somebody upsets Flaco, he'll go "watch out, amigo. I'll set my wife on you."
They always laugh at him, to which Flaco will stand up to them (literally,) looking down and going "I might give you a chance to flee and sort yourself out, but my wife sure won't, and it'd be a real shame if you ever have to meet her."
Honestly, Flaco just jumps at any opportunity to say those words, and sometimes he makes his own opportunities. He'll go "my wife!!" whenever he sees you, or will turn to you and go "my wife?" just to confirm that yes, you're his wife.
"There she is!! there's my wife!!!!" :D
(NSFW)
When it comes to the bedroom, Flaco doesn't say it as often as you might expect him to. He loves saying it to show you off, which he does a lot, but he tends to pick other pet names when he's in bed with you.
Flaco has two horny moods: one where he just wants to raw you like crazy whilst calling you names like his whore, and another where he wants to be gentle and tender whilst he calls you his wife.
When he's in his tender mood, he'll shower you in affection and praise when he's in the middle of making love to you; he'll be rolling his hips, kissing along your neck, all whilst whispering about how much he adores you, how much he treasures you, how much light you've brought into his life.
Flaco can be quite the romantic, and sometimes you swear he's secretly a poet. Maybe he spent all his time in the mountains reading poetry books and fawning over you like a schoolgirl?
After sex, Flaco loves having you lying on his chest, spending some time pillow talking with you, as he fiddles with your hair between his fingertips. Sometimes you feel like a dog because he loves petting you so much.
