Hardest decision of my life: Dropping out of uni
So... If you’ve been following me for a while you’ll know this first year of uni was not what I was hoping for, at all. I did not feel comfortable with the few girls I would hang out (not because they weren’t nice, just cause we were really different people) and most importantly, I did not like any of my classes. I was not motivated, and I would skip pretty much all classes, which then made my grades go down.
I worked so hard on high school just so that I would have good grades and would get into the uni I’ve always wanted. And I did. I was so excited and thought everything would be amazing and just how I had pictured it all in my head. But it was not. I would have to wake up at 5.30 am, get ready, spend an hour on a train, and just to do a few hours of class that I would not enjoy. I would be at university from 8 until 2 and I would not eat anything until I’d arrive home at 4. That made me feel very tired all day long, and that’s when I started having serious health issues. I lost my period and my body started to collapse. I was feeling so sad and depressed I would skip classes and then would feel even worst. I failed a couple of exams (bare in mind I had never failed anything, my grades in high school would never be below an 8/10) and all my grades were around 6-7 out of 10. I felt stupid and didn’t want to go anymore.
A couple of months ago I decided to apply for another degree, which I liked a lot more and had assignments I was more interested in. For the first time in a really long time I could see things going better. I’m not sure you all know how the education system works in Spain, but basically I had to apply to that degree with the grade I got when I did my exams last year. Little did I know the exams that the students had to make to get into university this year were a lot easier than the ones from the year before (which were the ones I did). What does that mean? If a degree has 80 vacant places, only the 80 students with the better grades in the exam get in. This is what we call the “cut-off mark”. My grade was of 11,2 (out of 14) and the last person who got in had an 11,37. Which meant I was out.
When I got notified I didn’t get into that degree, I collapsed. I couldn’t stay at university doing something I didn’t like. After a lot of thinking and talking to my parents I decided the best decision for me was to drop out and have a “gap year”. By no means I’m not going to uni anymore, I just need to make sure I am studying what I really want to study.
This year I’m going to work and study for my IELTS exam because YES, I might be going to the UK to do my undergraduate there, it’s always been a dream and I feel like that’s the path I should be going. It’s obviously a lot of money I need to save up because accommodation is very expensive, but I’m determined to do it.
Feel free to message me if you are going trough or have been through a similar situation! I will be making more posts cause I feel like this is something we don’t get to see often. We are used to seeing perfect people, studying something they really like and having the time of their lives. But truth is, it doesn’t always work like that! But we all learn from our mistakes, and I hope this is the right thing and everything works out.
