From Left: Schmidt, Hyatt, Imler. Not shady looking at all.
As a self-confessed sheltered 19 year old, meth and the production of methamphetamine's are not exactly subjects I can call myself an expert on. But as a general rule I would assume that the number one thing you shouldn't do when you’re attempting to cook up some meth is call 911.
Seems like common sense right? Well apparently not.
Late Monday night a 911 dispatcher received a phone call from Sonny Clay Hyatt, a 39 year old white male from North Carolina asking for assistance as he was lost in the woods.
Using the GPS on Hyatt’s phone, the police found our wannabe Walter White in a forest area just off Goat Farm Road but quickly realized that something wasn't quite right with this rescue mission.
The suspicion mainly arose from Hyatt’s reason for being in the woods in the first place.
And what was it you ask?
Ghosts.
Yes, you read that right. The best response this man could come up with was ghosts.
Sonny Clay Hyatt claimed that he was out in the woods with his two friends, Thomas Glenn Imler (38), and Eric John Schmidt (31), to search for paranormal activity, but became separated from them and soon found himself lost.
Now as the local authorities were apparently not as stupid as Sonny Clay Hyatt, they continued to grill him until they came to the real conclusion of drugs. Hyatt eventually admitted that he and his friends ventured out into the woods to try and cook up some meth (they were afraid to do it in their apartments), but when the cook failed the three got into an argument and went their separate ways.
On arrival back at Hyatt’s house the police allegedly found evidence of a small “one pot shake and bake” meth lab, and the chemicals to make meth.
Hyatt and his friends have since been charged with manufacturing methamphetamine and possession of methamphetamine precursor chemicals.
No official statement has been released from any of the three suspects, but an exclusive source tells me that Thomas Glen Imler, and Eric John Schmidt are understandably pretty pissed with their friend and his “piss-weak cover story”.
Which leads me to the all-important questions this story made me ask myself?
1) If I was making meth, got lost in the woods, called the police and needed a cover story. What would it be?
And
2) If my friend was dumb enough to call the police after we tried to make some meth, and then used ghosts as a cover story, would I stay friends with them? (Answer: Probably Not)
Sincerely, Flash Jacqui
Side Note: Dear NSA, during the writing of the above article, this reporter had to google some facts about the production of meth to ensure her writing was factually correct. Please don’t put me on any lists. Thanks, Flash Jacqui.
