#flicker quips

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what if make. . . masc oc. . .

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-dusts off my blog- I may not be here for a long time but I'm here for a good time 😗

Might write some drabbles if inspiration strikes

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what if living my best life includes making a vampire oc?? like sure i could probably make demon work for the same aesthetic but it's not the SAME i want to put the blood back in blood lust!!!

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if I was gonna give aster a tf it'd probably have to a dog. like she has some cat tendencies in trying to seem more aloof than she actually is but like.

short stoic character receiving any kind of positive feedback trying to seem unaffected but tHE TAIL BE WAGGING is just. SO so funny and cute to me.

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just some random thoughts about aster's relationship w/ loyalty below the cut while I'm on my work break.

tw: survivor's guilt, unhealthy coping mechanisms, assault and other usual dol-related warnings.

so i think at this point its pretty clear that aster's primary trait is loyalty and protectiveness, but i feel like i havent gotten to delve as deep as id like into the ways its not nearly as 'good' as it seems.

like for instance, for the most part, theres no moral attachment to her protectiveness — you either are an orphan and she'll look out for you, or you aren't and she won't. in that same vein, she could save you one day and in the next instant go help your biggest bully who also happened to be an orphan, and wouldn't feel even like a shred of remorse.

there could even be instances where she leaves a fight between two orphans be, because she doesnt think either of them will do lasting damage and the rationale she has doesnt really have much space for orphan v orphan conflict.

aster doesnt protect people out of a sense of righteousness, its not an empathy thing — in fact, in most cases, shes very emotionally detached from the people shes helping? and thats mostly on purpose, despite how seriously she takes this like self-designated responsibility, she doesn't reqlly want to get attached to her 'charges'.

(its why older!aster doesnt have friends, not counting pcs she gets closer to.)

now ofc theres exceptions! shes fully capable of bonding with people — and once she does, she does so extremely intensely on her end. aster thinks protecting orphans is the only reason she survived the crash that killed her family, and depending what pcs she gets attached to, it is entirely feasible she could completely abandon protecting the orphans and instead pivot to a single person instead — but that kind of single minded devotion does have its own drawbacks (pans gaze to damsel @rosurie ), ranging from the target of her devotion finding it suffocating (or worse) to aster becoming extremely exploitable because she will pick their needs over her own without limits or hesitation.

tldr aster's brand of protectiveness is a self-destructive coping mechanism her mind settled on after losing her family and getting dumped immediately into the orphanage at 16, because she couldn't deal with the idea that it was just pure chance she survived and they didnt 🙃

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my fiancée's doctor wasn't an asshole about her hysterectomy referral!!!! 🎉🎊

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today is a bit of a wash 😩

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nothing says Valentine's like doing chores with my polycule 😂