#fmstart

[caswiththeass]

I lost it at the turnaround. What was my time?

[scknicki]

"What? No--no, but it's my day off. Fuck...fine, fine. But you me big tim."

[fckjaimie]

Go right ahead, make yourself comfortable. Might as well since you already invited yourself in.

[psychologistxtravers]

"Please, come on in."

[noahlennon]

"Fancy a drink?"

[noahkpls]

So this one time I was sitting on my porch, smoking a joint and minding my own business, when my neighbor walked in my yard -- mind you, he was only wearing his robe -- and said, "hiya, darlin', i won't call the cops if you share." and that's how I met my birth father. No, I'm totally kidding. I'd never met the man in my life. Ah, I need a joint now, come to think of it. 

[xokurt]

I thought this sort of drama only happened in public schools...

At least it'll give some students the chance to see their parents for a little while.