#fnh828

[sanstheskeletonbutidobackflips]

when you genuinely cannot stop drawing

[thelilacbird]

voice recording - 4/30/2026, 7:14 p.m.

i hate that max design pro and twiddlefinger and stuff has had such a huge impact on my life, my art, and my storytelling, and my identity and just almost every facet of my life, like–every part of my life has been influenced by these stupid things. and max design pro, in particular.

it’s–so many things–you know, of course, everything you watch, you listen to, you engage in, it’s all going–it’s all going to influence you, it’s–it’s going to influence everything you do, everything you say, everything you are. everything is bound to have an impact on you, mostly depending on how much you engage with it. and i found that throughout these past–it started in 2024–i was here for the peak of twiddlefinger and max design pro, and all of the–you know, the–the friday night funkin–you know, little lyric mods like silly billy and shucks and that sort of thing. and i–i remember, you know, making fanart at the prime of it, and just doing so many things in its name because it was so–it was really cool and so incredibly new and amazing.

and it still kind of holds that same weight that it did before, it–i found it at the time so insane that, you know, this content farm, brainrot channel for kids, you know, could gain such popularity. and you know, grow such–at the time, it was really, i was just really only amazed by like, you know, oh my gosh, brainrot content farm, but you know, spooky, and oh my god is twiddlefinger in the actual the actual max design pro shorts???

oh, my god, whoa, and you know, i would freak out every time i saw twiddlefinger or any reference to it in like the actual max design pro, official shorts. i would freak the genuine f*** out. i would tweak out going, like, oh my god, i can’t believe this, it’s canon.

it’s canon, the yaoi is canon. oh, my god, and you know. it’s still kind of been like that over the years.

it’s–it’s–i usually have these like fandom phases. i’ve met a few other people who have this, but i’ve also met a lot more people who don’t, but–so i’m just going to, you know, explain it very briefly. it’s like little points in my life where i hyperfixate on, you know, specific things and fandoms and stuff.

like a gravity falls phase or a friday night funkin phase, where i just indulge in so much media of the same fandom, or thing for a good period of time and you know, my world just, you know, revolves around that thing, you know, and so–and you know, i just kind of move on after a while to go have another phase of a different thing. if i, get bored of it or i run out of content to consume of it and you know, i just move on to the next thing and kind of forget about it until maybe it’ll show up again and i’ll have another phase of it.

but max design pro and twiddlefinger, and like those other mods about it–that’s–it stuck with me.

it stuck with me like i couldn’t–it’s weird, i–it stuck with me, even throughout other phases, you know, i kept indulging in media of it, even when it wasn’t–even when my world wasn’t entirely revolving around it. i found it so amazing still, and i–you know, i continued to just devour content of it, and you know, it’s kind of been like that. all the way up to now and probably forevermore.

and you know, i’ve had, you know, a few specific max design pro phases, surprisingly, one each year. but after i joined, you know, the twiddlefinger, discord server and like the–the max design pro fan server, that’s it. like what? february 10th, i think. that’s also when i got my new phone, whatever, but basically when i got into it for like the third time and, you know, my world started revolving around it yet again.

i got into new things, like right now, i’m in my second sonic phase. and yet, i’m still–i’m just eating up all the content of max design for–that i can get, and i feel like a lot of that.

uh, came from the server. you know the fan server that i’m i–excuse me. sorry, i’ve been drinking like fanta and shit.

and you know, you might know me on there. as twiddlefinger–n–not f twiddlefinger. yes, i’m twiddlefinger after all the wasted years need to get a taste of your fear–okay, whatever–

you might know me as twiddleGPT, uh–and i–i–i–i could– i could explain that, you know, i will–just real quick. actually, no.

i’ll explain that after you know, the meat. the meat of what I’m talking about. um, it’s i’m sorry– like a month ago okay?

so a month ago, i–on the fan server, we were talking about how max design pro has been using AI and you know? the week when that really started to dig in–that really started to dig into my skull, and finally, make itself apparent, that max design pro is currently, actively using AI for things–it kind of–i had like a week where i just felt constantly miserable.

and you know, i remember going to walmart with my dad and I remember seeing igor– i love tyler the creative vro– i remember seeing an igor vinyl.

at there and i was like, oh my gosh, i want that so bad that’s so cool and you know? but my dad said no–i dorgot the reason why? but he just said, no, he wasn’t gonna buy it for me.

and he said, like maybe when i clean my room after, you know, a lot of pestering from me and you know, i–i just kept complaining about it. and even though it’s already been settled, the deal’s already–the deal’s already done, you know, the deal’s already–bam, it’s settled. this is what we’re gonna do, but you know, i kept complaining about it, because i was just trying to distract myself from the constant, miserable feeling.

that was like plaguing my mind–Shakespearean ass– okay, but i really just tried to distract myself from the real problem by, you know, and you know, my dad, of course noticed because I realized, you know, in the midst of all my complaining and shit, i realized that i was just trying to distract myself, and it finally settled in again.

the real problem. and you know, i just kind of quieted, i just kind of– i looked like the definition of depressed, and you know my dad, he thought i was still, you know, on the igor thing.

and so he was like, okay, i–you go back and grab that album, put in the cart, and i was like, no, no, you said i couldn’t get it. and he said, look, you know, i can’t see you, i can’t stand to see you just so sad about this sort of thing. and i was like, no, it’s not about that.

it’s fine. i don’t need it. you know, i don’t need it.

and you know, he eventually just dropped it. and so I dropped it. and later we were in the car and you know he finally got me to, you know, open up about what was, you know. what got me so down?

and you know, i was like–i finally explained to him about the entire situation. how for the past few years, max design pro has just been such a huge influence on my life.

and you know, seeing him use something i’m so–i’m so fucking against. i’m– i’m with all of my heart–i have fought with against AI. and you know generative AI and all that sort of thing. just no matter the circumstance, no matter the situation i–i fight back to fucking authority.

i will fight back. i will. and my dad even said, like– you are too young to be raging against the machine like this.

which I kind of understand. so you know, seeing him use something that i’m so wholeheartedly against it just kind of broke me. and you know, i looked up to this guy for some reason, some odd reason. and i realized what the real problem is.

i’ve been gaslighting myself. i’ve been gaslighting myself. let’s start at the beginning.

max design pro was created. it’s a brainrot content farm, you know, I mean, it didn’t really originally start off as that, but, you know, algorithms changed him and you know june, july of 2024. twiddlefinger is released and you know, it takes the internet by storm.

it takes me by storm and i thought this guy was chill. my brain gaslighted itself into thinking that max design pro, because, you know, he included twiddlefinger in this– in like his shorts, he was some cool, amazing guy who just, you know, makes content farm on the side, you know, and i was like–i used excuses like, oh, he interacts with his fans, you know?

he, you know, he has a soul, you know, regular content farms don’t have that, you know, he’s like luxury, you know, and so that’s what my brain told itself. and it’s– it’s so wrong because he’s not that. all of that is just lies my brain told myself to make it, to make it all seem so much cooler, so much better, this guy who’s supposed to be a content farm is actually this amazing person.

and i put him on a pedestal, and i didn’t realize i was putting him on a pedestal. because i put them there, also, and you know, as time went on more and more incredible fan made creations of inspired by twiddlefinger and max design pro like anotherbrother and ode to a friend, my beloved, i love it. i love it so much, and all these new mods and all this new content came out about it, and you know, it really– i dived so deep into it.

and you know, since there’s all this poetic shit, i was like, oh my gosh, this is so– so deep, all of this is so cool and so deep. and so i put it on more of a pedestal, because that’s what people do when they find things that are greater than them. and you know, max design pro, since my brain associates him with all this it dragged him along to it too.

and i watched this community flourish in real-time. i was there the entire time you know, watching all of this go down. and it was heaven, it might just be rose, tinted glasses, but i remember it being so damn cool.

and it had such a huge influence on my life. and when max used AI it was kind of the last straw. it made me realize that this guy isn’t–you know that cool chill, older brother type who just, you know, does just a little content farm, little brainrot, but still has some heart and soul and puts effort into his animations.

and god was i wrong. i looked back on, you know, all of his creations, and you know, while there are some little gems, it’s all the same at its core, isn’t it? that was a reference to something. in every world maybe we’re same at core. okay, whatever i fucking love that song. but anyway, it was all just brainrot and this guy did jack shit redeemed– to redeem himself.

i mean, sure the quality of his shorts, you know, it went up a little over time, but from the shorts i’ve seen as of recently, it’s gone down to– down down down to where it was never even before. and it’s– he’s–it’s just so awful to know that this man, this community that has had such a huge impact on my life that I put on a fucking pedestal, that I treated as fucking god, that I worshipped–that I wanted to be like.

i let it influence my life so much. and this guy is just slop. this guy is scum.

he creates awful animations of his awful little stories of his awful little characters, and he covers it all up with his community. he covers it up with his dedicated artistic talented fans. and he rides off of the success.

he’s–it’s like he’s trying to–it’s like he’s holding a carrot over our heads–it’s like we’re a horse, he’s holding a carrot in front of our head and he’s on our back and you know, he’s riding us to get to the fame that he wants– that he does not deserve. he’s like, oh, the end of twiddlefinger, ooh, look at this cool twiddlefinger animation, look, max and nugget yaoi, ooh, they’re gay, they’re kissing, look, look, LOOK. and we create so much content for him.

i’ve created so much f content for him. i have a sketch books down–i have a dedicated place for almost all my sketchbooks, and i have more sketch books that aren’t even in there, and there are so many drawings of max design pro, so many little doodles. so many little things and so much– over there, over there– i have drawings hanging up on my wall.

i have so many–so many things created for this guy. i have stories about this guy–you know, f BYGONES??

i– that was the first story i ever fully edited, revised, and finished, and published–not published, but entered into a fucking contest. that’s the first story i ever truly– truly finished, that I felt okay with, that i felt happy with and I went through so many challenges to make it, because it was gory, it was about fucking child sexual abuse and learning to move on from that and it was just– and I had to jump through so many– this obstacle course of dodging bullets and trying to make this family friendly for the fucking middle to high school– is what I’ll give you–competition– for– for kids and i had to make it under 1600 words. that’s 1,600 words that’s barely a fucking paragraph.

that is barely a fucking paragraph and I managed to do that like 70 less than the max amount and yeah, i managed to fit 8 fucking chapters in there. 8 fucking chapters. do you know how long i worked on that thing?

i’ve worked on it since like– since like september and i finished it in like– what? the first day of december or like the end of november like I worked so hard on that f thing. and it was–I didn’t win by the way. i–and we– we–and they’re not letting us read the winner’s.

so i’m guessing it’s fucking nepotism but that’s the story for another day because that’s not what we’re talking about. the point is i’ve created so many things for this guy to just have him betray us to stab us in the fucking back to stab us in the heart. with our own creations, and– we–we have to blame only ourselves.

this guy didn’t ask for twiddlefinger. this guy didn’t ask for another brother. this guy didn’t ask for triflethumb this guy didn’t ask for any of this.

this guy didn’t ask for twistedtoes. this guy didn’t do anything but make money by tricking little kids into clicking the like button and subscribing to his god awful channel.

and–and yet we still create things for him. do you know how much max design pro art i’ve seen in like the past month?

how much max design pro art like i’ve made in the last month? it’s–it’s fucking insane. we can’t let go of this guy because he is directly associated with all of these beautiful, amazing perfect creations and we make fan art for that which immediately leads us to make fan art for this guy who does not deserve it.

he does not deserve these fan creations. he does not deserve any of this. he does not deserve any of this.

he– we only have ourselves to blame, we made this. this is what has become of us, talented, beautiful, amazing, gorgeous artists who spend days hours months into making these amazing creations, animations, music, stories about this person who uses– who is directly fighting against us.

this guy is using fucking AI. do you know what AI does to artists? to any artistic– any creative job ever? to writers? to animators, to any of us, he’s using these– these chat fucking GPT which is directly– which is directly– directly fighting against us, to make his own content, which we still create fanart for– which we still, i still put this guy on a pedestal. i– and it’s–and you know what, you know what the worst f part is?

I still believe he can change.