
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Finland
seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Maldives
seen from United States
seen from Belarus
seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Singapore
seen from Pakistan
seen from China
seen from Ukraine
seen from Malaysia
Well shit!
Here I am again. I feel gross, terrible, fat, unhealthy, incapable. There is this weight on my chest and abdomen that I feel when I walk around, it has to be fat and inflammation pushing me down. And shame. It's succeeding. I feel so low. I have been here before many, many times. Posting about my weight loss plans. Yet, here I am again. Obviously it didn't work...more on that later. I feel sick, diseased. It's quite scary actually. What is stopping me? I feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work to be done. It's daunting to even consider this weight loss task again. But I really need to change my life. I have a beautiful 7 month old son. I'm 35 later this summer and my feet hurt all day, every day. I'm out of breath. God help me when my son starts walking and I have to keep up. My biggest fear, aside from premature death, is missing out on life (his and mine) because of my repeated poor choices. If I don't make these changes how long do I really have before something happens to me? Diabetes. Heart attack. Stroke. Cancer. It could be any of these and I wouldn't be surprised. Don't let me mince words here, I could lose 125 lbs and still be overweight. My best guess is that I'm around 285, maybe even 290. Fuck, I have a lot to do.