The "queer is a slur", "only [X] can call themselves [Y]", and "you can't be [Identity A] while also being [Identity B]" nonsense always feels just so pathetic to us.
Like, how do you look outside, see the absolute fucking danger that queer folk are in and think it's important to gatekeep or police terms and identities? If someone wants to throw their lot in with us, I'm fucking for it.
"But what if the amatanormative patriarchy doesn't take us seriously??" They literally do fucking not already. And when they do, it's because they take us as a threat and are working towards our extermination. Maybe don't help them with that?
"What if a cis perisex man starts calling himself a lesbian?" Yeah that's what terfs think all of us tranny lesbos are anyway. Maybe we meet this guy with curiosity and acceptance? Either we get another taste of the wide wondrous diversity of the queer experience, or he does. If he's trolling, he'll get bored way faster than we will.
"But what if they aren't really queer and are just jumping on a band wagon because it's trendy?" If you're new to this, look up the whole "transtrender" thing. If you're already using it, fuck off. Again, if someone throws their lot in with us I welcome them wholeheartedly. There is nothing to be gained by being queer except for the love and acceptance of the queer community, and the hatred and vitriol of the state and its loyal enforcers.
"But queer is a slur!" And so the fuck is every single word under the rainbow. If it upsets you so much, mute the fucking word and move on.