summary: Oscar is a devout catholic, and the reader loves spending time with him; after all, friends should walk together in faith… right?
warnings: mdni, fingering, oral f!receving, sexual tension, blasphemy (why not?), first-person reader, manipulation (?)… I think that's all.
notes: as you probably know, english isn't my native language, so there may be errors in the writing. this fanfic has been in my drafts since february, and I decided to post it even though I hated it. If you like it, let me know.
Oscar Piastri and His Devotion 𐔌՞. .՞𐦯
It's not like Oscar was a bad friend; he just wanted to help me understand how difficult it is to be a devout person. We go to church together, and he prays in such a charming way that you can feel all the faith he emanates. He loves the feast days in honor of the saints, oh God, how he adores them!
He knows how much I long to be a novice and then become a nun; he respects and admires my willpower. Sometimes he says, "My God, how I wish I were as steadfast in church as you," and I feel adorable but at the same time like an idiot… I wasn't as good as they thought and said. Sadly, I lost count of how many times I stared at my "colleague's" tight jeans, stared at his veiny hands longing for his touch, or felt my private parts terribly hot after a touch on my waist.
Oscar was a good man who reprimanded his friends when they brought inappropriate topics to the table. Oscar is a good man who always went to talk to the priest after Mass. A good man who regularly confessed sins that the priest laughed at because they were so silly. A good man who once asked permission to enter the convent to give white roses to the nuns as a gesture of admiration.
Oscar is a man who attracts the attention of all the girls, but always shows disinterest in them. Oscar is the man who makes any girl fall at his feet begging for an indecent touch. After all, how could one not fall in love amidst so much tenderness?
Oscar is sitting on my bed right now, we're discussing saints. Our friendship has evolved a lot lately, it's almost as if we can't spend so much time apart.
"What do you think of Saint Roch?" I asked.
"He was a nice guy, he donated his things to the poor, cured people of the plague, and he even likes dogs."
"Hm… and Saint Rita?"
"She's interesting, she was beaten by her husband, lost her children, like most saints she suffered a lot and died. She's the personification of faith, every time I have a terrible race I pray to her and the following weekend I excel."
"So that's the secret?" I replied with a smile on my face.
"I'm a great driver, okay? But in this sport everything becomes an impossible cause…" I started laughing even more.
"Alright, aspiring novice, my turn! Saint Augustine?" he asked, interrupting my laughter.
"Oh, calm down! He combined everything that many hate, faith and reason. He was very intelligent, although I've never stopped to think about some of his ideas."
"He was cool, he had some fucking awesome ideas."
"Oscar!" I slapped his arm and he started laughing.
"Sorry, I lost my manners," he said between laughs.
"To conclude, what do you think of Saint Benedict?"
Oscar fell silent and became serious. "Oscar?"
He snorted and massaged his chin thoughtfully.
"I don't know, I find him very dramatic."
I stared at him in astonishment.
"Oscar, he's the patron saint of Europe!"
"Yes, but I think he's a fool. He rolled around in a thorny bush to escape the temptation of a woman who invaded his thoughts during a prayer… what nonsense!"
"Oscar, he was studying to become a priest!!!"
"My dear, he wasn't even approved by the church."
"But it's ridiculous that you speak of him like that! He was an important man and still is."
"I believe that in my pre-adolescence I had more perverse thoughts than he ever had in his whole life."
Oscar leaned against the footboard of my iron bed. My room looked like a girl's from the 90s, with flowery wallpaper, posters of Catholic saints, a white desk with very few beauty products, and other wooden furniture. On the headboard of my bed was a rosary and a prayer beads, and above it an image of Jesus and his disciples at the Last Supper. An eternally naive virgin, but it was all I wanted and needed, right?
"I wish I could be like him, confront my sinful desires that way."
Oscar laughed at my answer; perhaps deep down he knew that my truths weren't as true as everyone thought.
"How silly you are, aren't you? You'd throw yourself into the woods, get hurt at what cost?"
"For the same reason as him! To escape sinful thoughts and maintain my purity."
His arched eyebrows and indecent smile reflected very well what was going on in his mind.
"What are you trying so hard to escape? The times you got jealous seeing me talking to other girls? The urge to kiss me after a discreet, indecent touch? Or the thousands of times you stared at my penis during mass? Tell me, I'd like to know."
My throat tightened as if a lump were stuck, preventing me from speaking and acting properly. My blood felt like it was boiling inside my veins, my senses now seemed disconnected, and my wide eyes revealed my worst secret.
"You're a silly girl, did you think I wouldn't notice? God wouldn't want to see you sad for not pursuing what you want."
"Oscar… you're distorting everything."
His gaze met mine. Suddenly my body was hot, as if it were melting. Oscar crawled towards me, our faces were close, and he began to rub his nose against my cheek.
"Oscar, you better stop," I said, my voice trembling.
He let out a nasal laugh.
"Push me away, move me, and then we'll stop."
I didn't move. I stood there like a fool, an idiot! I couldn't escape; he knew everything, he noticed every detail and my slip-ups. Oh God! I don't want him, I don't need him, why can't I leave him?
His smile, his eyes, his breath near my mouth…
"Oh darling, you want this, don't you?"
I was ashamed, destroyed, feeling like a failure, but at the same time… everything seemed so right. I just wanted to get rid of that feeling of lust.
"Don't feel bad, I'll do all the good you asked the heavens for… I'll take you there."
He nestled his face between my legs and began kissing the inside of my thighs until he reached… well, there. He kissed my entrance through the knitted fabric of my shorts. I was worse than before, making sounds as if I were tired.
Oscar pulled down my shorts, leaving my panties still there. Baby pink panties with printed bows… silly again! But Oscar seemed to like what he saw.
"Bambi, can you feel it?" He made light movements with his index finger over the fabric; it was wet and sticky.
"I-I don't know why you're like this."
He laughed.
"Bambi, you did this. You're wet, excited, and all this because of me. Can't you understand?"
I just nodded.
"Good girl, I'll make you feel good."
When Oscar took off my panties, I could feel the cold, the neediness, and the desire. I was completely exposed. Luckily, my vagina was shaved (not that it matters!!) because I was going to wear a bikini for the first time at a party and… that's not what matters.
He places his index finger in my folds and God, how can that be a sin?! He slides his finger so lightly up and down, Jesus, I'm so wet!!
"You've been in here before, right?" he asks, looking at me with eyes full of desire.
I shake my head and he smiles again, it's almost annoying!
"Good girl, Bambi, let me teach you."
Suddenly the icy emptiness is filled with warmth and internal heat. Oscar's index finger stays there – inside me – adapting, being crushed by my interior. Slowly Oscar begins to move, making a hooking motion and reaching a place in me I've never known. He speeds up and everything becomes so… obscene. The wet noises, the sounds my throat couldn't contain, and the guilt.
"Osc… please, t-this is so…"
My words are swallowed by a devouring kiss Oscar gives me. He inserts another finger, he's very close to me. He pulls away and takes the rosary hanging on the headboard and wraps it around my hand.
"Be a good girl, pray if you need to, you're on the right track."
I am on the right track.
With both fingers still inside me, Oscar goes down and starts to devour my vagina. So good and different, why would God blame me? Oscar starts to go deeper and my legs feel like they're going to melt, I grabbed his blond hair as if I were taming him. He puts my legs over his shoulders and with each movement everything gets more intense. He was reaching such a deep and sensitive place inside me, I felt like my walls were crushing him and God HE WAS DESTROYING ME! His tongue went up and down over my vagina which by this point was throbbing with desire.
"Be a good girl, Bambi, and look me in the eyes."
Oh God, as soon as I looked I could see his flushed face, his mouth smeared with my juice, everything seemed so good but so… confusing. When I was approaching the climax, Oscar stopped touching me.
"O-osc… what…"
Oscar licked his fingers, still dirty with my juice, staring at me as if it wasn't over yet. He raised his head and widened his eyes with concern. His strong, thick hand caressed my sweaty, burning face; I was trembling. A thick tear rolled down my cheek, and guilt began to overwhelm me. I clutched my rosary, trying to feel less dirty.
"Oh God, how perfect you are. Don't cry, darling, is everything alright?"
I nodded as tears streamed down my face, a crybaby!
"What happened? Did I make you feel bad?"
The tears fell even more, sobs trying to interrupt me. "I-I'm dirty! And bad… I-I shouldn't have l-liked it."
Oscar smiled, maybe he knew even more about me than I did.
"You can cry as much as you want, we're all sinners and God loves you for it."
"H-he does?" I replied through tears.
"Yes, silly. He wants you to enjoy life and be happy, is there a better way to do that without feeling pleasure?"
Maybe it was a good idea, maybe I could pray the rosary ten times if I didn't feel well… God wouldn't judge me for this, right?
"Well… God wouldn't judge me for this, right?"
"O-okay, just don't put that thing in there,! n-not now."
Oscar smiled as if he'd won the battle, but not the war.
"Why would I put it in? This is your first lesson, we're practicing."
My cheeks burned. The sight of Oscar looking at me like I was a queen was enough to drive any girl crazy! And if we're just practicing…
"A-are there going to be other… lessons?"
"Do you want more?"
The question was humiliating, and answering would be even worse. But I nodded, eliciting another of Oscar's many smiles that day.
"Great! Because she will need a lot of lessons to be satisfied."