uuuuuuuuuuuuuugghhhhhhhhhhhh I just want them haaaaappppy I just want them happy I’m going to fucking die during the 3rd season I just want these boys to be happy and laughing and winning matches *rolls away*
*rolls away with you* I am so done, I don't think I am ready for the third season. I want to see their beautiful, precious faces, but not so sad and disappointed and all.
I knew that falling for the Blue Elites was the worst choice I made in my live even before it happened. BUT STILL HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THEM
FUCK CANON MAKE KAIJOU HAPPY
Aw, you’re flattering me. But of course you can’t. Some of my fics are supposed to be horrible and angsty. And you, Karasu-chan, are like a sunshine and starlight and everything warm and sweet.
o////////o Vinny! ... you mean when I am not spamming your twitter with screencaps of the game that shall not be named?
Like hell it is. I am the human version of the grumpy cat. The embodiment of sadness and pain ... oh wait, I still can't compare to some of your fics though...
Pairing : Kuroo/Yaku
Words : nearly 1000, like, so so near.
A/N : For Vinny's awesome kuroyaku life headcanon and maybe, if you like it, i will do another one bc that one was awfully short i am sorry
you're so awesome i'll cry once
[AO3]
Kuroo should have been happy. Should have been happy that his friend had maybe find something, someone else to be happy. To be as happy as they had been together before their fall out as lovers, as boyfriends. But he could not help but think about the bitterness coiling in his stomach, in the way his muscles tensed slightly as he watched Yaku turn his back from him as he talked about the boy.
He should have been happy.
But there were still the memories of them together, of how much he had loved him, how much he still did if he was honest with himself. And the whole propesct of knowing, of seeing Yaku walk away from him more surely than before, wrenched his heart and guts both.
« Maybe i will say yes. He is sweet after all. »
Kuroo exhaled slowly, turning his head upward as if in thoughts when Yaku hummed at him in question, turning back to him. There was no mistaking the jealousy seeping into his veins and making him ache for something he still didn't know what it was.
For a slight moment, Kuroo wanted to laugh. He was being jealous of a tall and clumsy boy because he had had more guts than he had himself, that he could be the one to make Yaku happy after all.
Because that was the gist of it, wasn't it ? That despite everything, despite their mutual agreement and tentative friendship throughout the year, despite having found again the companionship they had shared before, Kuroo felt that it wasn't enough. And the idea that Yaku could accept Lev's confession made him all the more aware of it. Of the fragility of their situation, of how he could lose him to someone else, how much they would lose then.
But Kuroo had no rôle to play but one of a friend. To be supportive, to smile and watch as Yaku walked away.
But here, in this empty locker room, the same one where they had kissed for the first time, properly and without teeth to hurt, nothing felt right. Not the way he was shying away from everything, not the way he watched silently as whom he had held close to him for so long walked away from him and his heart at each word.
« Maybe you should. » he wanted to say, even above a whisper. Even when the words caught in his throat, because he should be happy. And he was somehow. In this twisted way that yaku considered it, but didn't say yes yet. In the way that maybe this would make himself forget this twitching feeling in his gut whenever Yaku was still here, the restlessness of his heart even if he knew better.
When Kuroo still didn't say anything, Yaku walked up to him, standing with his bag on one shoulder, waiting for Kuroo.
« Cat caught your tongue ? »
Even at Yaku's usual stern expression, Kuroo couldn't help but snicker. The cat had indeed caught his tongue, and probably even more.
« Not even one bit. I was just thinking that you should do what you wanted. As you said, the kid is sweet. But isn't he too tall ? »
When Yaku punched him slightly on the arm, so familiar, Kuroo smiled at the easiness of their interactions. Familiar, and close, it was what it should be.
Even despite all of this, it was not something that Kuroo desired. And there was nothing he could do but lean towards Yaku and kiss him. Even sweeter than their first kiss, chaste, even despite his own surprise. But that was what felt right. Yaku's lips under his, touching. But as he thought his touch was undesired, as he was ready to excuse himself many times, one « sorry » on the tip of his tongue already ; that was when he felt Yaku's hands grip his hair tight and bring him down once again, forceful and pressing.
Oh.
Kuroo closed his eyes as he let his hand rest on Yaku's cheek. That was what felt right. This closeness between them, Kuroo's body pressing slightly against Yaku as he felt him deepen their kiss. Something familiar, known, intimate without thinking but never unwelcome.
It was strange how you would miss insignifiant things Kuroo thought. The wy Yaku always traded his fingers in his hair, how he would tilt his head just so and never go on his tiptoe but instead woul press Kuroo's head closer to him as he gasped in their kiss, as Kuroo touched his nape to answer just so.
When they took their breaths again, looking at each other like something opened between them, like it was the first time they kissed, in this same locker room, years ago, Kuroo tried to say something. « It wasn't mean to be » « I can't let you go » and so many conflicting thoughts Kuroo couldn't even form himself, couldn't even voice as he looked at Yaku again and again.
« Maybe he is too tall indeed. » Yaku only said, short breathed and looking at Kuroo intensely.
There was many things to talk about yet, but when they kissed again, slower, more intimately ; trying to recognize the other again, touching lightly as they kissed, nothing else was said. It could wait. It could wait until the beating of their hearts stopped, and the clenching in Kuroo's stomach eased, as nothing else in his mind could stay but the feel of Yaku being here, closer than he was before.
The thought that Kuroo could finally reach out to him without feeling guilt, without feeling anything but what he denied himself from the day Yaku called him in this park.
