[Christianity’s] strong points were consolation, compassion, affirmation of the sanctity of self. But it threw little light on the meaning of world. It left world more or less out of the picture, focusing on God, on the one hand, and self, on the other. The hot line it set up between God, who was beyond the world, and soul, which was within the self, completely bypassed the material realm. In this way the manifest world was in effect excluded from the spiritual drama.
… I was drawn to the Old Testament, with its exultant language of praise, but the Christianity of my teachers was strangely mute on the meaning of the sunrise, the wind, the creek, the herons, and cranes, the light before the storm—the things that spoke so palpably, if inscrutably, to me. Since such religion had nothing to say about the spiritual significance of these luminous poetics, I gave it up, even before I left school, and upon entering university, I turned to philosophy: if I could not explore the spiritual significance of the manifest world in religion, I thought, maybe I would find some clues in this ancient discipline.
This was in the late 1960s, and philosophy in the English-speaking world happened to be going through a phase which I, with my yearning, found particularly arid. It was all about logic and the structure of language, while metaphysical questions—questions about the nature of reality—had long since been debunked as naive and old-fashioned. After my first year of this (I was by now in London), I was determined to give it up. But I was lucky enough to meet, just at that point, a wonderful teacher. … This tuned-in teacher took me back to the metaphysicians of the early modern period, who were indeed attempting to fathom the ultimate meaning of the world. I became completely enamored of Leibniz and Spinoza in particular, two philosophers who, in their different ways, sought to capture the intuition that everything is woven from the same skein, that everything informs everything else, and hence that “mind” in some sense must be intermingled with “matter.” …
Freya Mathews, For Love of Matter: A Contemporary Panpsychism