#fund it.

[the-entire-hog-blog]

Overwatch, but in the style of Vigilante 8.

[krawdad]

How big of a following do you need to have before the assholes start showing up

I've got this asshole ratio theory that I think could be narrowed down

Working at Disney taught me that if you encounter a high enough volume of people, at least one of them is literally guaranteed to be an asshole.

I don't know what that number is

But I bet it can be arrived at

[hastyfeline]

listen: sweatpants with "BOTTOM TEXT" across the ass

[ofgeography]

some fun ideas of things to do when you’re sick!

1. try to sit up without getting woozy and feeling like there’s a small but passionate samba dance team out living their dreams of winning the Dance Dance Samba Dance Thing competition on the tender ridges of your brain. HAHA, YOU CAN’T. your body has betrayed you and everything that you have strived to build together. on the bright side, those crazy samba kids are finally going places. 

2. watch every episode of the blue planet, despite having a preposterous fear of the ocean. everything that happens will be the stuff of your nightmares, including but not limited to open and endless ocean into which you cannot see and which is vast enough to hide WHALES, it can hide WHALES!!!!, multiple shots of sharks feeding, and INVISIBLE SEA CREATURES THAT WILL EAT YOU. 

why are you watching this? why are you watching this? why are you watching this? you can’t stop. you can’t stop and you can’t stand up to run away, because as soon as you do there will be a samba on your brain.

3. fill up 42 trashcans with tissues. "disgusting,” you whisper to yourself. “you’re disgusting.” your nose is now so red and tender from so many tissues that it hurts to blow your nose. also, you’re out of tissues so you’re using paper towels. this doesn’t help your poor nose, but fuck your nose, because your nose is a NEVER ENDING GARBAGE PIT AND YOU STILL CAN’T BREATHE.

also, to add insult to injury, tom hanks at no point appears at your door with daisies to say he wants to be your friend. 

4. be too hot. then be too cold. then be too hot. then be too cold. compromise by wearing a crop top and shorts while huddling under a fake snow leopard blanket.

5. get to that part in the blue planet where they make you watch birds eat all the baby sea turtles. cry. shout, “FUCK BIRDS,” at your netflix. like???? what the fuck, birds????

 carry that weird resentment of birds with you for the rest of the day.

6. try to read. you can’t, because it’s too hard to focus on things like “plot” and “subtext.” instead spiral into a weird fantasy about a crimefighting shapeshifter whose shift is a slow loris.

that’s the funniest fucking thing in the whole world.

7. “i’m not NAUSEOUS i’m just filled with an entire bathtub of aches, sneezes, head pain, and occasionally bouts of fever,” you say through a mouthful of french fries, on the phone with your mom, who you called so that she would feel bad for you and say, “awwww, baby, you poor thing, you’re still the prettiest girl in the whole world,” but instead she offered you practical advice like that you should “get some rest” and “drink orange juice” and “stop eating french fries.”

GOD MOM I’M A GROWN UP I CAN MAKE MY OWN DECISIONS!!!!!!!!!!!

8. invite your friend over to watch you hack up a lung. remind that friend about the slow loris thing.

that shit’s hilarious.

[inegotism-archive]

Super High School Level Burekas Movie Director.

[inegotism-archive]

New horror game idea: Five Night's at Hope's Peak. You have to spend five nights at Hope's Peak. That's it. 

[captifate-blog]

dude.  this ship name is too good not to use.

mercury x ren?? mulan rogue