Apr 27, 2025
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Kermit's got cocktail questions!
Best scam call ever
So, I answered the scam call and as soon as I answered “our employees are not available, please stay on the line and we’ll be with you momentarily”
I was like, why did they call? lol
a conversation with a lovely telephone scammer
me: at home, phone rings
dad: answers phone
“mike/russ”: this is time warner cable/spectrum
dad: yes hello i would like to get $25 off my bill can you help me do that?
m/r: yes what are you paying now?
dad: you should know that, don’t you? can’t you just fax me the proposed contract to my law firm?
m/r: sorry what was that?
dad: fax a contract to my law-firm, can i talk to your supervisor?
m/r: sorry no supervisor is available
dad: wait let me transfer you to the office manager -(hands phone to my sister)
sister: hello this is the office manager
m/r: hello this is mike
sister: can you fax me a copy of a proposed document to get $25 off?
m/r: sorry what can i do? I need to know how much you are making
sister: let me transfer you to my office supervisor - hands phone to me
me: hello this is the office supervisor who am i speaking to?
m/r: this is mike, is there something you would like me to do a discount you want?
me: yeah i would love to get a discount like $25,$45 the whole bill? that would be great
m/r: okay what are you paying now?
me: shouldn’t you know that isn’t it in your records? i’m sure you have those it’s a big company can you fax me a proposed contract to the law firm?
m/r: sorry we can’t do that
me: you don’t have a fax??? wow that’s crazy i have a small company and even i have a fax machine it’s great you should get one
m/r: no we have one miss-
me: oh great you can fax me the contract then! that would be great faxing is great
m/r: how much are you paying now?
me: you should know that! you have records at a big company like that don’t you?
m/r: what kind of shows do you watch? what channels?
me: oh i love the walking dead, breaking bad, bob’s burgers, all the shows i watch a lot
m/r: so you watch premium channels?
me: i watch all the channels i’m sure you can tell that i like to flip through and everything i love it.
m/r: so what do you want?
me: a discount a lot of money, you can fax me the contract too right? a proposed contract?
m/r: how many tv’s do you have?
me: oh 302
m/r: 302? hahaha that’s a lot you’re kidding
me: no no i have a lot i use mine here and at the office we got them in each office, in the waiting room, people can’t get bored! that’s crazy
m/r: you don’t have 302 tv’s that’s too many
me: you don’t know how big my house is
m/r: what are you paying now? do you want a discount?
me: yeah!! a discount would be great seriously can i speak to a supervisor? i’d love to get it faxed to me.
m/r: yes sure - one second break - hi this is Russ
me: Russ? you sound just like Mike oh my gosh
m/r: no this is russ not mike
me: i swear you sound just like mike you are the same person that’s crazy
m/r: no thats my half brother my father runs the business
me: oh okay you sound so much like him though that’s crazy are you sure you’re not the same person?
m/r: no no it’s russ
me: let me transfer you to one of my managers - hands phone to mom -
mom: hello yes, who am i speaking to
m/r: this is russ
mom: can i have your name and number so i can call you back on monday?
m/r: -gives mom a fake number and name russ-
mom: okay thank you and you can get me a discount?
m/r: yes how much are you paying now?
mom: you should know that! you have records
m/r: do you want a discount?
mom: yes fax me here is the number, you can fax me on monday
m/r: how much are you paying?
mom: yeah how much am i paying i don’t remember?
m/r: -hangs up-
me: i swear that was the same guy he did not transfer
-phone rings-
mom: hello
m/r: i just have one thing to say, you should go out and buy a dildo
mom: oh yeah i don’t really need one because my husband’s dick is so big you’re the one that needs one
m/r: -hangs up-
-phone rings-
me (british accent): yes hello who is calling?
m/r: yes tell your husband that he can go fuck himself you fuckin bitch
me: i’m sorry but i think you’ve got the wrong number i don’t have a husband, my boyfriend and i just got back from a nice dinner and the phone was ringing so i answered who is this?
m/r: yes you are joking with me you can shove your 302 tvs up your pussy
me: excuse me sir but who are you and where are you calling from?
m/r: i am russ i am calling from rochester
me: oh yes but what company
m/r: i am calling with the illuminati
me: oh the illuminati? that’s fun i am looking to get a job around rochester can i work for them? can i apply?
m/r: go fuck yourself go fuck yourself
me: i’m sorry but you’ve got the wrong number you are mistaken
m/r: well take your 302 tvs and roll them up and shove them in your ass
me: okay well you must have mistaken me for someone else, your girlfriend maybe? an ex?
m/r: go fuck yourself fucking bitch
me: -laughing- you have the wrong number i just got back from dinner and answered my phone for this? that’s not very nice
m/r: fuck off pussy -hangs up-
phone rings again
dad: if you call this place one more time you will regret it i am an italian lawyer you fucked with the wrong people
m/r: okay i will call you back in ten seconds
-hangs up-
from then he kept calling and we ended up blocking him, lovely man mike/russ was not really sure which one
‘I give you complete creative freedom’, said no client ever. Watch this funny video conversation, if you’ve ever been dragged into an irrelevant client call....
911 Operators Share Their Stupidest Calls, And It’s Too Embarrassing To Read
911 Operators Share Their Stupidest Calls, And It’s Too Embarrassing To Read
Everybody knows that you don’t call 911 unless you’ve got an emergency…right? Well, not quite, because as you can see from this funny if not infuriatingly dumb list of unbelievable calls that 911 operators have received, some people have a pretty bizarre idea of what exactly constitutes an emergency. From the woman who thought her washing machine was possessed by the devil to the person who…
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911 Operators Are Sharing Their Stupidest Calls Ever, And It’s Exhausting To Imagine They’ve Truly Occurred
911 Operators Are Sharing Their Stupidest Calls Ever, And It’s Exhausting To Imagine They’ve Truly Occurred
All people is aware of that you do not name 911 until you have bought an emergency…proper? Nicely, not fairly, as a result of as you’ll be able to see from this humorous if not infuriatingly dumb listing of unbelievable calls that 911 operators have obtained, some folks have a fairly weird thought of what precisely constitutes an emergency. From the lady who thought her washer was possessed by…
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(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6ej2_P-leY)
(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zUi08m7TrQ)