#future convo

[the--entropy]

Mum: who finished my wine Me: it was.. an emergency

[dandelion-in-spring]

20 years from now

My husband: honey how did you get so good at sucking dick?

Me: *flashbacks to all the gay porn I read as a teen*

Me: ......

[poreberjinglebells]

Me: Awa mo na. Magpakita ka nga ng emosyon! Wag mo ipakita yang expressionless mong mukha!! (Irritated)

Him: Bakit? E sa ayaw kong ngumiti o sumimangot. Bakit ba?

Me: Basta!

Him: Bakit nga? Masaya naman ako kahit hindi ko ipakita. Pati ano bang masama?! (getting irritated)

Me: Alam ko! Ramdam ko! Ang sakin lang, wag mong ipakita sa kanila yung bagay kung saan ako nafall sayo! Masama ba yun?! I may sound possesive pero gusto ko ako lang yung may kakayahang malaman kung anong nararamdaman mo. Sila, alam lang nila kung ano yung nakikita nila! Masama ba yun?!

Him: (speechless) ^__________________________^

[min-ewyoongi]

me: go explore the world and have some fun

future child: what did u do when u were a teenager?

me: i fangirled

future child: and?

me: what, do u i think im dora the explorer or something

[canyoukindofnotdothatthing]

me: i just need time. you chose her & i respect that. I just didnt realize that meant you would all together stop caring about me. we have been best friends since before her, but i guess that means nothing to you. have fun with her. make her feel special. but in the back of your mind i just need you to know that while youre fawning over her like every one else, youre tearing me apart. its immature and selfish, but i blame you. i blame you for the unhappiness and hurt in my life. i hope you enjoy the short time youll be with her, until she finds someone else. i wont be here when you get back. you made your decision, live with it. 

him: youre being so stupid. i dont understand why you dont want us together. youre over dramatic & if you want to go through life as unhappy as "ive made you", thats not my problem, especially since you "wont be here when i get back" whatever, annie. do what you want. i am happy. and she isnt going to find someone else. we are happy, why cant you let us be happy? youre just jealous. because i dont and wont love you like i love her. so just do whatever. ill do mine, with bebe. we are happy. youre making yourself miserable being so obsessed with me. let me live my own life. you are not my mom. my mom wouldve been happy for us. 

me: oh ok

[merloments]

roommate: hey Kate what'd you do last night?

me: I knocked the dick-tickler off his face, son!

[awellboiledicicle]

I kinda... want a Furby, just to.. scare my furture child. Not because i'm evil or anything, just like "You're in trouble."

"I'm sorry mommy."

"I know you are, but you're in trouble. As punishment..."

" 0n0 "

"You will either have a ten minuet time out, or play with this." I will hold up the Furby. It's eyes wil roll and ears will wiggle and it will make it's furbish noises. "For three hours."

"Time out mommy, i'll be a good kid now mommy." Theywill then run to my significant other and cry about how i'm the mean parent.

...

I still want a Furby. I might buy one.