Aug 3, 2022
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Chase the Wind, ch. 18/?? (GaaNaru)
Title: Chase the Wind Chapter: Eighteen (Promises of a Lifetime) Fandom: Naruto Pairing: Gaara/Naruto Rating: T Words: ~6600
Summary: Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was.
Note: I own nothing. The title is derived from “Touch the Sky” by Julie Fowlis. I was torn between that and “if I gotta be damned, I wanna be damned with you” from Meatloaf’s “Bat Out Of Hell.”
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Chase the Wind - Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was. (GaaNaru) One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve | Thirteen | Fourteen | Fifteen | Sixteen | Seventeen
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Temari met them as they arrived at the hospital. Gaara surmised from her arrival beside them that her soulmate’s injuries had been properly tended to. Still, he thought, perhaps there was power in asking out loud? “Your… that boy?”
Temari’s body stiffened just enough for Gaara to remember they hadn’t yet communicated an understanding of who he was to her. She recovered smoothly, however, and shrugged. “He’s fine, just a little boo-boo on his hand.” Her gaze, however, remained contemplative on the distance for several moments longer before she focused back on him. Her brows furrowed. “You’re… hurt?”
“Just tired,” he said, bristling even at the mention of that small weakness. In reality, he was exhausted. His gourd maintained its shape more through the power of his beast than from anything left within him. The sand he used to cover himself was all he maintained, and even that was testing the limits of his endurance. He’d pushed himself too hard to get to Naruto, only to arrive too late, anyway. What had been the point of exhausting himself if he was still able to do nothing in the end?
Temari hesitated for a moment, then reached out. He watched her pat his shoulder. “But Naruto’s all right?”
He nodded, jerkily. “Physically.”
He’d felt Naruto wake up. He wanted to see him. Yet, with each step he took, he wondered what he was ever going to say to him. How could he quiet the anguish he could feel roiling inside Naruto’s heart? He knew too well the pain Naruto was going through to be able to give him any kind of solace.
“Here,” Temari said quietly. ‘Let’s get you to the front desk. I’ll show you how their medical system works here.”
Good. The faster, the better. He just hoped that, by the time he reached Naruto’s side, he found some way to help him.
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He’d failed.
Sasuke was gone. Despite his confident promise, he’d failed to bring him back. Now what was going to happen to him? Orochimaru wanted to kill him and take over his body. And even if he didn’t… even if he didn’t, Sasuke hadn’t held back. He’d really tried to kill him. He never would have thought…
Naruto stared at his lap, at the starch white sheets that covered him. Gauze wrapped around his head in nearly every direction. He barely remembered what had happened there at the end; he’d noticed only that he’d been injured, and that he could feel the kyuubi’s chakra coursing like lava through his veins. He’d seen Sasuke still in front of him, his body distorted into something Naruto could hardly recognize. Naruto had put everything he’d had left in him into trying to stop Sasuke then and there, before Sasuke could go to Orochimaru and let the man change his body even further.
His fingers clenched in the sheets. But he’d failed. All he’d had, and it hadn’t been enough. It was like that time he’d thought he was fighting that battle in Konoha against Uchiha Itachi all over again, as he’d been forced to watch Gaara die because he hadn’t been able to do anything. Just like in reality, when his best had been able to do little more than buy him and Gaara time against their enemies. Every single time, Naruto faced the limitations of his capabilities. Every time, his failure cost someone something.
What would he lose next? What worth was there in a dead last loser who couldn’t save even the few people he had?
What if… what if Sasuke died after this? And Naruto could have stopped it?
“Well, well. You’re awake.”
Naruto lifted his head. His face split into a grin. “Shikamaru!”
He was alive! Leaving him up against that lady – after Naruto’s own failure, he’d feared the worst. But it seemed like Shikamaru had managed all right. Shikamaru came further inside at Naruto’s wide-grinned welcome. Shikamaru’s gaze slipped quickly around Naruto’s figure, taking in the bandages and, probably, since Naruto had learned how astute Shikamaru was, the stiff way he held his left shoulder. Shikamaru sat on the foot of the bed, carefully distant from Naruto’s feet, and spoke. “Chouji and Neji are out of critical condition. Lee’s been put on bed rest, but they say he’ll be all right. Same with Kiba and Akamaru.”
Naruto nodded. “So everyone’s safe.” They hadn’t died for this mission, even though they hadn’t caught up with them, either. “That’s good.” The thought that Neji and Chouji had been in critical condition to begin with, though. He picked at the sheet at his waist.
“And Sasuke…”
Naruto flinched. He sucked in a long breath. “Yeah.”
He didn’t need the reminder that he’d failed. That all the sacrifices everyone had made, the promises he’d given, had all been for nothing. Everyone had given their all, risked their lives, and come out victorious.
Except for him.
In the end, everything had rested on him… and he’d failed. The class loser. Only this time, it had been something truly important. Far more important than even passing the academy exam. And just like with that, he’d shown his true colors. “He… got away.”
What a nice way of saying Naruto had been too weak to stop him.
They sat in silence. There was nothing more to say after that. What could possibly be added? ‘I did my best?’ ‘I threw everything I had at him, even something I probably shouldn’t have?’ ‘I’m sorry?’ None of it meant anything. A shinobi lived and died by his word. Naruto had failed to uphold his. He’d let everyone down.
And Sasuke? What was going to happen to him now? Would he even still be alive when next Naruto saw his body? Would he be himself, or would he be Orochimaru? Or… or if he did live somehow, would he still be the Sasuke who’d tried to kill him? Would Naruto even be able to reach that person then?
The door opened. He startled at the noise, then again when he saw who stood in the entrance. Old Lady Tsunade, and… his breath stilled in his chest. Sakura-chan.
“Naruto…”
Her eyes were so wide. Her lips sat in a frown, her brows low. She knew. She knew he had failed. He hung his head.
“I heard that you were severely wounded,” Tsunade said, her tone perturbed, “but you’re fine now.”
Old Lady Tsunade was an adult, had been when the kyuubi had attacked. She had to know why Naruto was already healed. He ignored that line of conversation. It didn’t matter. “I’m sorry, Sakura-chan.” He gritted his teeth.
“Why’re you apologizing?”
He flinched.
Her tone got even more falsely chipper as she moved to the wide window. “You look really weird!” She opened the curtains. The light flooded the bed, turned the white sheet nearly golden. “You’re just like a mummy, aren’t you?”
“I’m sorry,” he tried again. “I…”
“Listen, the weather’s good today.” Behind her falsely chipper tone, the birds mocked her. They sang out from the nearby treetops. “I opened the curtains now…”
“Sakura-chan!” He raised his head. His hands curled into trembling fists on the sheets. “I’ll definitely keep my promise!” He forced conviction into his voice, until he could believe it. Yeah. Yeah. That was right. If a shinobi was as good as his word, then he would keep it. He wouldn’t give up. “I said that it was a promise of a lifetime!”
Sakura didn’t turn from the window. “It’s all right, Naruto.”
“Sakura!” Shikamaru snapped. His voice startled Naruto; he’d forgotten Shikamaru was there. The lazy guy actually looked angry; his voice was sharp. “He’s trying to–”
“Always,” he said, cutting Shikamaru off before he could tell her. He would never underestimate Shikamaru’s eyes again. “Like I said.” He grinned wide. It hurt a lot of muscles in his face, but the pain wasn’t so bad. “I won’t go back on my word! That’s my shinobi way.”
Yeah. Exactly! Over and over again, he’d failed. Just like he’d failed the academy exam. Just like he’d failed the chuunin exam, and just like he’d failed to reach out to Gaara. But everything had worked out fine, because he hadn’t given up. He’d just tried again. He’d proven himself worthy of passing the academy exam. He could go back and take the chuunin exam again. And even though he’d failed to reach out to Gaara at first, he’d done so later. They’d made up. They were bonded. Heck, even now, he could hear Gaara in the back of his mind; whatever mission Gaara was on hadn’t taken him so far away that Naruto couldn’t hear him.
That sound was proof that he could do it as long as he kept moving forward. He could do this. One failure had never meant the end.
Sakura turned to him. He caught Shikamaru and Tsunade-baba smiling at him, but Sakura still looked on the verge of tears. He kept his grin wide as she looked him over, from his bandaged head to his bandaged arms and hands, then finally at the sheets, hiding the rest of the bandages. Maybe she’d been on to something with that whole ‘mummy’ thing. He chuckled at the thought. Maybe he could use the bandages to truss Sasuke up and drag him back. That would be a sight!
“Naruto.” He caught a wobbly smile before Sakura moved to the door. She cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, Naruto. I had to make you wait a while, but…” She looked back. The smile no longer wobbled. “Next time, we’ll do it together!”
His eyes widened. Far more than the sunlight streaming through the window, Sakura’s words lit something inside of him.
That… was right. He wasn’t alone. The fight with Sasuke may have fallen on him, but he hadn’t chased after Sasuke alone. Shikamaru and Kiba and Neji and Chouji and even Lee. Sakura, too. He had friends who cared about him and cared about Sasuke. Heck, even Gaara, wherever he’d been, had been worried about him.
Gaara.
The thought made him pause as Sakura and Tsunade took their leaves. Gaara couldn’t have known what had been happening to him. And hey, Naruto hadn’t known what had happened to Gaara. He’d felt Gaara feel fear and exhaustion. Had… His heart started pounding all over again. Had Gaara met up with the Akatsuki on his way to his mission? Was that what had happened? Naruto had been so caught up in his own problems that he hadn’t thought about what Gaara might have been going through. He struggled to get out from under the sheets. Shikamaru yelped as Naruto kicked him out of the way.
How long had it been since he’d first heard Gaara’s concern? How long since he’d battled Sasuke, his mind only on not getting in Gaara’s way? He should have paid more attention. If anything had happened to Gaara–
“Keeping up with your mood swings is giving me a headache.”
Naruto looked to the door and gasped. “…Gaara?”
His soulmate stood with his arms crossed in the doorway, his face completely stonewall impassive. Naruto grinned. His heart leaped. Gaara was all right. Better than all right. He was here.
Shikamaru shot out between them, his body tense. “Sorry,” he said, “but even if you’re on our side this time, I’m not going to let you…” Shikamaru’s tense stance shifted slightly. “Wait. ‘Mood swings?’”
“I thought something happened to you!” Naruto shouted, giving Gaara an explanation. Gaara eyed the way Shikamaru stood guard over Naruto, his eyes narrowing. “I…” He bit his lip, not knowing how to explain that he’d been too wrapped up in himself. “I’m glad you’re all right. Did you have some sort of mission that brought you to Konoha?”
Gaara turned his gaze to the far wall. He was still glaring. “You could say that.”
“What is going on?” Shikamaru asked out loud to nobody. “Tell me it’s not what I’m thinking.”
Gaara acted as if Shikamaru hadn’t even spoken. Naruto chuckled and scooted back into the bed, feeling Gaara’s concern behind the impassivity. He patted the side of the bed. Gaara’s gaze slid to Shikamaru. He didn’t move. “Shikamaru, get out of the way. You’re freaking Gaara out.”
“Me?” Shikamaru sent him an aghast look. “Freaking him out?”
“Yeah!” Naruto was sure of it. Gaara was uneasy here. He could feel it as clearly as he could feel his own happiness. He leaned over, trying to find a space through which Gaara could walk. There wasn’t really much of one. Shikamaru was good. “Just let him through. He’s not gonna hurt anybody.”
Shikamaru’s shoulders stiffened. He didn’t move. “The last time he was here, he was about to kill us. Remember that?”
Gaara winced. Naruto winced, both at Shikamaru’s words and at Gaara’s reaction. Naruto shifted, then winced for a whole other reason. His head throbbed.
Gaara moved past Shikamaru without hesitation then, calling Shikamaru’s bluff, going to Naruto’s side and kneeling beside the bed. Naruto gave him a wide grin. He looked up to Shikamaru to find the young man with his fingers together, ready to use his shadow technique. “He’s changed,” he said, and watched Shikamaru’s brows rise up to his hairline. Gaara looked Naruto up and down, finally zeroing in on the bandage around Naruto’s head. Naruto chuckled and reached up to finger the edge of the bandages. “It’s already fine,” he told Gaara. “Nothing big. I’m already mostly healed. Tsunade-baasan said so.”
Gaara’s lips thinned. “For a moment,” he murmured, “I could not feel you.”
Naruto’s eyes widened. Had… had he truly come so close? “I…” He didn’t have anything to say to that.
“So you two are soulmates? How is that possible?”
Naruto looked up. Shikamaru looked like someone had thrown a gas bomb into his face. “What’s wrong with it?”
Shikamaru looked at him like he was nuts. “This guy is a psycho. He tried to kill Rock Lee. He tried to kill you.”
Both he and Gaara winced at that one. “Okay, so it doesn’t look good from that perspective.” Naruto rubbed the back of his neck. Shikamaru’s face twisted up like he didn’t know if he’d eaten something putrid or just sour. “Hey. Don’t.”
Gaara stood before Naruto could think of some sort of defense against Shikamaru’s growing glare. “It’s fine. I only came to see how you were. We need to return to Suna soon, anyway.”
Gaara turned away from him as if to leave. It made everything in Naruto jump. He felt like the instant Gaara stepped away, he would fly into a million pieces. “Wait!” He grabbed Gaara’s arm, nearly smacking his elbow on that gourd of his. Even through the cloth of Gaara’s shirt and the bandages wrapped around Naruto’s palm and fingers, he could feel the rising gale of the desert winds as they shook in the back of his mind. His body trembled with the need to touch, to be close. He gasped at the feel of it. From the stiffness in Gaara’s shoulders, he imagined Gaara could feel it, too.
“All right, that’s enough.” Shikamaru grabbed Naruto’s hand and forced it off of Gaara. “I get it. You feel that urge to be near them, get that bonded feeling. Whatever. It wouldn’t be wise.” Shikamaru stepped in between them and crossed his arms. “I know you’re all about acting first and thinking later, Naruto, but bonding with him? Let alone the problem of him being a psycho, he’s from another country. What if relations with them sour?” Naruto scowled. “Don’t give me that look.”
Naruto watched Gaara start walking away and shot up from the bed, nearly clipping Shikamaru in the jaw. “Gaara!”
He could feel Gaara’s emotions, now that they were close. He remembered the bond back when they’d been in Suna together and shivered. This was nothing like that. It was so much weaker. He couldn’t help the twist in his chest, the pain of knowing his bond with Gaara had weakened. He felt a twinge from Gaara, too, telling him Gaara was responding to his pain. He shoved Shikamaru aside, only for Shikamaru to grab his shoulders and yank him back. “I know it’s hard, Naruto, but we’re ninja!” Shikamaru hissed. “Don’t forget that.”
“Who cares?!” Naruto pushed him away. His legs still felt weak. His head pounded. He gritted his teeth. “Who cares if we’re ninja or not? Who cares if we’re from different villages or not? He’s my soulmate. And he’s a good person!” Shikamaru gives him a look. “He is! No, it doesn’t matter.” He looked at Gaara. He stood at the doorway, hesitating at the threshold. “What’s the point of a ninja if it isn’t to protect what’s important? Are we really just supposed to be killers and nothing else?” He glared at Shikamaru. “If we were supposed to be just that, then you wouldn’t be calling Gaara names right now! You’d say he was a great ninja!”
Shikamaru’s brows rose. His grip on Naruto loosened. Gaara turned. “Was?” Gaara asked. Naruto thought he might be seeing the trace of a smile.
“Are,” he amends. “But not because of the psycho thing!” Gaara didn’t seem to know whether to take that as a compliment or an insult. “Nevermind! It doesn’t matter.” He waved that off. “What matters is that people don’t like those like Orochimaru and – and–”
“And the old me,” Gaara said. Naruto flushed.
“Whatever! Which means that’s not what we’re supposed to be.” He reached up and touched Shikamaru’s hand, gently pulling it from his shoulder. “Right?” He looked at his new friend. Shikamaru sighed and released him.
“This isn’t going to end happily,” he warned, but he didn’t say anything more. Naruto hobbled his way to Gaara’s side, grabbing his hand, too, but this time pulling it close. He felt Gaara pull his sand back from his fingers and sighed at the flesh-on-flesh contact. Tears of relief gathered in his eyes. He bowed down under the weight of Gaara in his mind again, the maelstrom of their desert storm quieting into the sifting sighs of a calm wind. He leaned his head on Gaara’s shoulder and just… breathed.
As much as he wished he had words for the feeling of the bond settling, he didn’t think he did. He could just feel it. While the time spent in Konoha since Suna had been filled with headaches and chest pain and an emptiness like he’d been slowly carved out with a spoon, this felt like something cool and light had billowed in to those hollow, empty places. Something better than what had been there before, because before had been just him. Gaara didn’t move one way or the other, simply let his fingers curl around Naruto’s and watched as Naruto soaked in the essence of him like a sponge.
It felt like light. Light and air. Nothing was heavy or hurt anymore. His shoulders hunched, remembering the feeling of their bond as it had cut off. Gaara’s emotions spiked, as well, and suddenly Naruto could feel them as strong and clear as they’d been when they’d parted. Gaara was reacting to Naruto’s memories, his mind cringing away from the feelings they evoked as much as Naruto’s mind did. He sighed, and he felt Gaara shiver as his breath ghosted along the sand covering Gaara’s skin. He felt Gaara settling, his emotions becoming calm, like an eruption had just been halted. Gaara had been far more upset with Shikamaru’s accusations than he’d let on.
Here, now, Naruto felt like he could feel the deepest parts of Gaara, like he could feel every minutiae of Gaara’s reactions. He could feel a trepidation, a nervousness he couldn’t understand. He could feel sadness and acceptance and just – something like he was where he wanted to be, but didn’t know how to stay. Naruto wrapped those emotions around himself, sheltered them with his own. Gaara may have been violent, but Naruto understood. He wanted to be violent, too. His actions had turned frivolous, pranks and barbed words and jokes aimed at nothing in particular, his fury just spraying wildly. Gaara’s had been the same. Just more destructive.
If Naruto hadn’t been allowed his pranks, would he have turned to something worse, as well? If his mistakes had been met with violence, would he have turned out like Gaara, too? Naruto remembered how Mizuki had told him that he was hated by the village, how he’d been used. Maybe the old man, the Third Hokage, had been all that had stood between him and the same ending as Gaara. Maybe people would have tried to kill him, too.
No, there was no maybe. Naruto knew those looks. He knew what they meant. He’d felt it – a hatred so deep, it had no end. He would have been targeted. He would have been killed.
For a moment, he felt despair. How could he ever become Hokage if he was hated like that? And if he did, would people really stop looking at him like he was a stain on their world?
Gaara raised one hand and placed it on his head.
That was it. No ruffling of hair, no soft caress. Just… touching his head. Yet Naruto could feel Gaara’s emotions, could feel his concern and worry. Could feel that they were directed at him, at his thoughts. Because while Naruto understood Gaara’s anger, Gaara understood Naruto’s fear. They were the same, in ways no one else could possibly understand. Wanting to be something, being limited to what they were expected to be instead. The fear of truly being nothing more, and never achieving anything more. Of being completely and absolutely alone. Naruto smiled.
“Guys,” Shikamaru said, his voice soft. He stepped slowly forward. “I…” Naruto turned to see Shikamaru looking back and forth between them. His brows furrowed. “Are you… already bonded?”
Naruto ducked his head, shame and happiness bursting in him in equal measures. He thought maybe this was something that was supposed to be personal, to stay personal. Was what they were doing akin to a PDA? Should he not?
Then he looked at Gaara and smiled goofily. Oh, well. He didn’t care. Being with Gaara made him happy, crazy happy, and that was a good enough reason to show it.
“Keep this quiet,” Shikamaru said, his voice dropping lower. He glared at Naruto when he opened his mouth to argue. “I mean it. People still remember Suna’s attack on Konoha, and they’re still wary. And you – I mean this nicely, Naruto, but the village doesn’t have the nicest perception of you.”
Naruto’s smile slid. The fear and despair threatened to return.
“I get it,” Shikamaru said. He held up his hands as Naruto’s smile fell completely. “I do. You’re right that it shouldn’t matter. But it does. And if people here know about how the two of you are together, it won’t go well.” He ran a hand through his pulled-back hair. “That’s an understatement. You’re already disliked, and Gaara of the Sand here is still remembered for helping Orochimaru.”
“He thought he was doing his kage’s orders,” Naruto said, then realized the argument wasn’t as good as he’d first thought. The look Shikamaru gave him told him the same.
“Look, I’m not trying to say you can’t be together or anything. I’m not a monster.” He looked at Gaara as if realizing what wording he’d used and quickly added, “I’m just saying to keep it secret for a while. At least until the anti-Suna sentiment has settled down some.” Shikamaru scowled even as the words left his mouth. “Or longer,” he muttered.
Naruto didn’t know how to feel. Angry? Definitely. And he wasn’t the only one; he could feel the frustration in Gaara, even though his face looked as impassive as always. But when he tried to categorize the rest of his emotions, he found that frustration was the only one he could sense from Gaara other than… resignation. Yeah. That was it.
Naruto lifted his chin. “They already hate me,” he said, looking Shikamaru in the eye. “And Tsunade-baba can’t afford to piss off Suna right after they saved our cans. So who cares?”
Gaara lifted his head. His eyes widened fractionally.
Shikamaru covered his face with one hand. “I should have known you would say that.”
Slowly, Gaara pulled his hand out of Naruto’s grip. Naruto looked at him, mouth dropping open, as Gaara took a single step away. That warm hand slid from the top of his head. He could still feel Gaara, and he seemed happy. Happier than a minute ago, at least. But it was darkened by something else. Naruto reached for him, only for Gaara to scuttle back another step. “We have to get going,” he said again, his voice tight. He turned to leave, his entire body stiff. Naruto felt hesitation from Gaara’s soul. Naruto’s chest seized.
He ignored the pain in his chest, the fear, the howl as his wind kicked up into another sandstorm. Gaara wasn’t afraid so much as… no, was it fear? Naruto couldn’t tell. He wasn’t smart enough to know what it was he was feeling from the other. But it made him think of when he’d seen someone throw a frog at someone else and he’d gone up to find the frog had died from the rough treatment. Protective and helpless and frail and lonely and angry, all at once. The feeling in Gaara gave rise to his own. Was that what Gaara thought he was? A frog thrown by some kid, killed by ignorance and apathy? Did Gaara feel like he was unable to save Naruto?
“We’ll get stronger,” Naruto said. Gaara turned to him, so Naruto made his eyes sharper, his back straighter. His voice stronger. “We’ll get strong enough that it doesn’t matter, that no one can say anything about us anymore.” And Naruto would get Sasuke back. He grinned and gave Gaara a thumbs-up. “I promise.”
Gaara looked at Naruto’s hand and his thumb, and Naruto could tell that Gaara thought he looked like an idiot. But he nodded. He opened his mouth a smidge. Closed it. Looked away. “I…”
“I can’t believe this,” Shikamaru muttered. He came to stand next to them. “I’ll give you guys a couple of minutes,” he said, sighing like he’d been ordered to do paperwork. “I can’t believe you just promised on that same pose again.”
Naruto grinned with his teeth clamped together. “It’s because I mean it.”
Another sigh. “Yeah, I know.” He pointed at Naruto’s nose. “Only a couple of minutes. Just enough for you two to get yourselves sorted out.” He looked at Gaara. “And just because I know soulmates should worry about each other. No touching. No bonding. Just talking, like normal people. And Naruto?” He glared at him. “I mean it. Just a couple of minutes.” He walked through the door and shooed Gaara and Naruto inside. He looked back and forth between them for a long moment before gritting his teeth. “If I hear anything, I’m coming in, and I’m doing so on the assumption that you’re hurting Naruto.”
Gaara tilted his head. Naruto was surprised to feel a flicker of something like pride. Gaara had liked that threat.
Naruto turned to Gaara the instant the door was closed. This was their chance to deepen their bond again, without Shikamaru playing the stodgy old parent. But when Naruto reached out, Gaara backed away again. He threw his hands in the air. “Really?”
“There’s something more important I wanted to speak with you about, anyway.” Gaara turned to the bed. “You need to rest.”
Unbelievable. Naruto hurried to the bed, though, only slowing when he remembered Shikamaru’s threat. He sat down gingerly, trying to not make any suspicious sounds. “What’s wrong? Is this about your mission?”
“My mission was to assist you in yours,” Gaara said, and Naruto went silent as his brain tried to rearrange itself. So Gaara had been there for him?
“How? Wait, why? Wait.” He held up his hands. “What?”
Gaara snorted. Amusement flickered like candlelight across the bond. Their nearness to one another burned across his skin, heating the space between them. Naruto stared at Gaara’s hand. He didn’t know why things had to be so difficult. Why was everyone against them being together? “I arrived in time to – no. I was too late.” Gaara’s hands clenched into fists. It made Naruto realize that he was the only one thinking about the bond at the moment. Gaara was thinking about something much deeper. If Naruto could touch Gaara again, could they share these thoughts without stumbling over insufficient words?
Naruto tried to be the first one. He pushed his emotions forward, let Gaara feel the hurt and confusion and loss that he was fighting against. Gaara flinched at them all, so badly that Naruto almost pulled them away again. When he tried to do so, however, Gaara reached out. This time, it was Gaara who breached the distance between them. Who touched him first. It was Gaara who bared himself, until Naruto realized the emotions he was feeling were both of theirs – the pain, the sorrow, the confusion. What had they done wrong? What could they have done better? Why were they alone again? Why had they been betrayed by someone so close to their hearts?
Naruto sucked in a breath. Gaara understood this, as well. Tears welled up in his eyes. They spilled down his cheeks, dripped onto his lap. He shook his head, not wanting to admit Gaara’s pain. Not able to ignore it. “That’s not fair,” he whispered. His shoulders shook. “Not you, too.” He covered his eyes.
Gaara’s emotions blurred and flew, until Naruto couldn’t even bother trying to catalog them. He knew what they meant, anyway. They were the same as his. They both wished they could have protected each other from these feelings. “Uchiha Sasuke chose to leave you,” Gaara said, his voice quiet. Slow. Picking at a wound, knowing it would bleed.
Naruto shook his head, not wanting to hear it. Not wanting to accept it. “How…?” Naruto bit back a sob. “He called me his friend. Just before he…” He remembered the agony of Sasuke’s hand, feeling the palm twitch inside of him, against his own muscles and sinew. He remembered the wriggle of Sasuke’s fingers as he yanked them out. Now, to know Gaara also knew that feeling? “I tried so hard to reach him. I don’t know what else I could have done.” Except kill him. But Naruto couldn’t stomach the thought of doing that.
Gaara shifted. All of the emotions spilling between them, and all Naruto could think was that this horrible conversation was going to be the last they had for who knew how long. All because he was born in Konoha and Gaara was born in Suna, and they were both born with demons inside of them, and they’d been despised for it since they’d first come screaming into the light. “What could I have said that would have reached him, Gaara? What could I have done? I wasn’t strong enough to stop him.”
Gaara looked toward the door, and Naruto felt a sudden burst of panic that someone was approaching. That their time was over and Shikamaru was going to tell Gaara he had to leave. Gaara soothed the panic immediately, his confidence in their continued privacy washing over Naruto’s mind like a balm. Gaara turned back to him, his eyes studying. Naruto felt Gaara waver, back and forth, as if finding himself upon a fork in a road and having to choose. Naruto felt him pick a path just as Gaara opened his mouth. “When you fought me,” Gaara said, “did you feel as if we had come to some sort of understanding?”
“What?”
Gaara’s stare intensified, as if he was trying to impart something from his gaze alone. “Did you feel as if you had reached me?”
Naruto’s breath stuttered in his chest. Remembering that time, the fear and pain and loneliness washed through him before he could think of how it would feel to Gaara. Gaara’s shoulders tensed, but the only feeling he got from Gaara was one of – of knowing. Gaara wasn’t surprised at all. Still, Naruto tried to apologize. Gaara just shook his head.
“Our fighting, our insults and jeers. Our threats. None of it reached our ears. We both had things we wanted.” Naruto had wanted to save Sakura and Sasuke. Gaara had wanted to be free from the torment of thinking he had someone by his side. Naruto got the knowledge in a rush, as if he could hear the intention behind Gaara’s emotions. Gaara had thought the sound of his soulmate was taunting him, mocking him with something he could never have. Something that wasn’t real for someone like him. He’d wanted to hurt, because the sound had been hurting him. Gaara sucked in a breath, hearing Naruto’s own interpretation of Gaara’s fury and hatred. God. Gaara hadn’t even known that was why he’d been hurting so badly. Why he’d hated Naruto so much.
“I didn’t know what to do,” Naruto admitted. “I didn’t know what to do any more back then than I do now.”
Gaara understood. Naruto could feel him understand. He felt so young, suddenly. He knew so little of himself. Of the world. Of anything. “None of it reached me,” Gaara admitted. “Not until the very end. When you cried for me.”
Naruto jerked back at the rush of emotions that swamped him. Gaara must have entered his own memory, because it brought with it such a rush of feelings Naruto felt overwhelmed. Tears gathered in his eyes all over again. It felt like something warm had touched something made icy cold by neglect. Like something that had been left in the attic had finally been found again. It reminded him of when he’d been pointed to the rack of unwanted money pouches to find frog pouch after frog pouch. He’d chosen to grab one of those up and had felt like he was adopting something unwanted. It had felt like a relief – proof that the unloved could be loved. He cared about that money pouch far more than he could ever say or would want to admit.
Maybe Gaara felt a little like that when Naruto had cried for him – like the unloved had been, for once, loved. The way Naruto had felt when he’d heard Iruka-sensei say he was Uzumaki Naruto of Konoha. Or when Sasuke had told him his body had just moved to protect Naruto on its own.
Gaara stared at the floor, though he did not release Naruto’s hand. “When you chose to listen, to understand me. When you hurt for me. No one had ever cried for me before.” Naruto could feel Gaara’s emotions rise further, the wonder and awe and happiness and near-shame of that memory. The knowledge that there was someone who had cared enough to put Gaara and his emotions first. Hell, for someone to even realize Gaara had emotions. God, Naruto knew that feeling too well. “That was when you reached me.”
Naruto held his breath. He felt tears in his eyes again. He battled them back. Gaara could feel his reaction, anyway. He didn’t need to show it on his face.
Gaara squeezed his hand and looked up. Naruto felt something new. Something soft. Gaara didn’t want Naruto to hide his feelings, he realized. Gaara wanted to see everything. “During your fight with Sasuke,” Gaara said, and his voice turned hesitant. Naruto felt that feeling again – of trepidation, of wondering which side of the road to turn to. Then horror, as Gaara found himself turning down a path he clearly didn’t think was right. “Did you ever just… listen to him?”
Naruto opened his mouth to say he had, but he stopped. He thought back. He’d asked Sasuke why he was doing this, but Sasuke hadn’t been forthcoming. And when Naruto had heard Sasuke say he didn’t care that Orochimaru was going to kill him, he’d just… stopped. He’d stopped talking. He’d threatened to beat Sasuke black and blue, to rip off his arms and legs and drag him back to Konoha. To safety.
He blanched. No. He hadn’t listened.
“Back when I… found you,” Gaara said. Naruto could feel a million things from Gaara. But what he focused on was the last. Relief. “He stood over you when you… when your battle was over.” He could have killed you, Naruto heard with sudden clarity, Gaara’s voice ringing in his mind like water. Naruto got a flash of something he couldn’t understand, and then, but unlike Yashamaru, he didn’t try. He walked away.
Gaara was giving him hope. Gaara almost seemed like he was regretting it, but Naruto clung to it tightly. Because Sasuke had chosen to walk away. He had chosen to leave Naruto alive. He had meant it when he’d said Naruto was his friend. Naruto did still have a chance.
“Naruto.” Gaara tugged on Naruto’s hand until Naruto paid full attention to him. “I arrived too late,” he said again. The words reverberated in his head, saying so much more than just that. Speaking of the horror, the terror. Naruto remembered Gaara saying he hadn’t felt Naruto in his head anymore and realized Gaara had thought he’d found Naruto too late. The dead kind of too late. “Don’t let it happen again.”
Have your hope, Gaara was saying. If that was what was needed for you to continue forward, take all the hope you need. But come back to me. First and foremost, come back alive.
Try to reach him if you must, but put yourself first. That was what Gaara was saying. But Naruto couldn’t help but be happy with it all the same. Because Gaara, who seemed to, if Naruto was reading his emotions correctly, deeply dislike Sasuke, was telling him to believe. Gaara had seen something, there at the end, that made him think there was still a chance. Something Naruto himself had doubted just an hour before. “Thank you,” Naruto told him, and smiled.
Gaara seemed like he wanted to say more, seemed like he wasn’t all right with where their conversation had led them. But he didn’t say anything. He just turned back to the door.
They pulled their hands apart as Shikamaru opened the door. He glared at the both of them, then sighed again. “Come on. Your allies are here.”
“Siblings,” Naruto heard Kankuro call out from behind the door.
Naruto smiled again. Kankuro was calling Gaara his sibling. That was a good sign, too. Everything really was going to get better. For both of them.
He felt a flash of happiness from Gaara and realized Gaara could still feel him. His grin widened. I want this to remain, he thought.
Every chance I have, Gaara said back, a promise to return, and stood. “Thank you,” he said to Shikamaru, and moved to the door. Shikamaru’s eyes widened. Naruto’s jaw dropped. Promise me.
Naruto nodded. I promise. He wouldn’t take risks. He would get strong enough that risks wouldn’t be necessary. Strong enough to get Sasuke back. Strong enough to be able to keep Gaara by his side. Strong enough to become Hokage, to gain a place in the village that could never be taken away from him. Stronger, and stronger, and stronger. His fists clenched on his lap, his fingers tingling, cooling without Gaara’s hand to warm his.
He promised.
i couldnt pick just one for #NaruGaaWeek2023
YOU WERE ALL THAT I WANTED//YOU WERE ALL THAT I NEEDED
this is set to the song All That I Needed (Was You) by Jermy Budd. it is highly recommended that you play it while you scroll.
#NaruGaaWeek2023 is starting 🤧🤧i’m so happy
Chase the Wind, Ch. 9/?? (GaaNaru)
Title: Chase the Wind Chapter: Nine Fandom: Naruto Pairing: Gaara/Naruto Rating: T Words: ~5500
Summary: Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was.
Note: I own nothing. The title is derived from “Touch the Sky” by Julie Fowlis. I was torn between that and “if I gotta be damned, I wanna be damned with you” from Meatloaf’s “Bat Out Of Hell.”
Chase the Wind - Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was. (GaaNaru) One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight
Gaara watched him. Those eyes had always been piercing, even before Naruto had been important enough to be on his radar. There was something about them that was different from anyone else’s. Perhaps it was how tiny the pupils were, as if they almost didn’t exist. Perhaps it was the color, the sea green ocean nearly as depthless as that which they mimicked. Maybe it was just because the boy was his soulmate, and could undoubtedly feel Naruto’s emotions the same way Naruto could now feel his.
He could feel Gaara’s emotions, but they seemed so calm. He couldn’t imagine this to be how he’d felt before; he remembered the few moments when he’d felt a connection between them back then, and there’d been little been rage and hatred. Now, with his heart still beating itself out of his chest, it felt like Gaara was some sort of oasis. He was so grateful he could feel it.
Just like back then, when he’d been trapped in that living nightmare. When he should have felt nothing, there had been a resonance inside of him. It felt as if the howling drive of wind and sand had finally been soothed. At first, he’d felt nothing but dread. Of course it had been soothed, he’d thought. There’d been nothing more to feed it.
But then there had been more. Just as he’d hung his head and given up, he’d felt it. Him. Gaara. In a way he never had before. It had been as if they’d touched hearts. Gaara had felt kinder, warmer, gentler than anything Naruto could have ever imagined. As if Gaara had been looking at him as if he were the man’s sun.
It had woken him up. As if something had crashed through the world and shattered it. He had breathed in that feeling and found himself back in Gaara’s home, the battle somehow still raging, even though he’d been walking through Konoha for hours.
Now Gaara waited for him to speak of what he’d seen within that nightmare. His heart still pounded at the very thought of it. He couldn’t help but stare at those eyes, that hair, that face, those new clothes. No blood. No rips, even, despite the battle they’d just exited. Naruto had never seen something as beautiful as Gaara’s calm, unbroken face.
“I… what I saw?” He chuckled. Gaara didn’t so much as react. Naruto sighed. Right. Not like Gaara would be put off by anything Naruto said or did. He wasn’t the type. “Right. I was back in Konoha.”
Gaara winced. Regret shimmered across the back of Naruto’s consciousness. “And?”
His throat locked up. He looked around, taking in the soft undulations of the throat walls around them. It was still gross, gross enough that he kept his hands slightly curled into his body, not wanting to touch the walls with his bare hands. Still, it was kind of cool, and definitely nice to know he was surrounded by something that wasn’t trying to kill him.
He looked back to Gaara. He still hadn’t moved. If Naruto’s plan had been to wait him out, he was doomed to failure. He scratched his head. “Ahaha – well, I guess I just found everyone dead.”
Gaara frowned. Naruto kept laughing for a couple of seconds, but Gaara’s expression never changed. He guessed that was fair. It wasn’t… really something he could laugh about, either, really. His chuckles died. “Ah. Yeah.”
“You found everyone dead. Including that girl and Uchiha Sasuke,” Gaara said, naming his friends slowly.
“Sakura-chan. Y-Yeah. I…” He remembered seeing Sakura-chan’s torso, offal spilling over the roof. Sasuke, his eyes ripped from his sockets. He shuddered. “Yeah.”
Gaara’s calm never wavered, but something rose up behind it, nonetheless. It took Naruto a moment to realize it was worry. He felt it almost like a caress, as if their minds were touching. Even though nothing on Gaara’s face had changed, he knew the redhead was concerned about what such a sight had done to him. “It was a genjutsu. It wasn’t real. They’re safe.”
Naruto nodded jerkily. “Right.”
That hadn’t been all he’d seen. It had been, for the longest time, the only thing he’d found. Dead body after dead body, each street in Konoha sporting a fresh, new hell. But that hadn’t been the last thing he’d seen.
No. He’d seen that man, the one he and Gaara had just fought, holding Gaara in his hand. Gaara, already broken and bleeding, his chakra nearly depleted, blood covering his scar and one of his stunning eyes. Gaara, projecting frustration and pain across their bond.
Naruto had moved to fight. He’d raced forward, called bunshins – and had watched as the man in the cloak danced away again and again, their bunshins fighting back and forth. Rage had bubbled within Naruto’s belly, making him see red. And then – and then, with Gaara’s life on the line…
“That wasn’t all.”
Naruto flinched. He looked up, barely aware that his gaze had fallen to his feet until he found himself caught in Gaara’s gaze again. “What?”
“That wasn’t everything you saw. I can feel it.” Gaara tapped his chest, right above his heart. He did it with a straight face, as if it was completely normal to blurt out stuff about feelings and bonds. “What else was there?”
Red. So much re, and rage that sprayed all over. He’d felt it rising and rising… “Hey. Did I, uh. Lose control?”
Gaara was silent for a moment. “No,” he said finally. “You retained control of your beast.”
He gusted out a breath. “Well, that’s one good thing, then.” The words finally pulled a reaction from his soulmate; Gaara came forward and grabbed his wrist. He pulled Naruto’s hand down, not letting him hide behind it any longer.
He felt Gaara’s emotions more strongly the instant their skin came into contact. He could see not only what Gaara felt, but something deeper. He could connect things. Like – he could tell Gaara was concerned, but now he knew why – that Gaara was worried about how close Naruto had come, about what he’d seen. He saw – he didn’t know. Flashes of something he couldn’t understand. A rooftop at night, and tears. That big, red scar on his forehead. A memory? But not his own. Gaara’s.
It was like something deep and wretched and beautiful spanned out across the back of his mind. A wide, endless expanse that threatened to swallow him. He felt Gaara’s trepidation, as if the nin could feel what he was seeing and didn’t want him to know. Naruto’s breath hitched. He pulled away from Gaara’s touch, mumbling apologies as he did. Gaara dropped his hand.
“This is happening too fast,” Gaara said. He put a single hand to his head. “I remember hearing that there should be touch between soulmates, but that it should be regulated.”
Naruto laughed. It still felt hollow. “I always thought that was some stupid crap made up by adults.”
“It seems they may have been onto something.” Gaara stared at his hand like it was some alien appendage.
“Yeah. Whoops.” He could still feel that… that wideness behind his mind, just a hair too far off to reach. It teased him. Nagged him. He shivered. “I thought I’d… well. It was a dream, I think. Or… a vision? I thought I…” He cleared his throat. “I tried to fight.”
Gaara watched him. “You failed.”
Naruto covered his face, but that only brought the visions back. He dropped his hands again. “Yeah.” The silence around them pressed in on them. Outside of those creepy walls, Gaara’s brother and sister were fighting for their lives. Jiraiya-sensei was fighting two crazy people in coats. And Naruto had just been shown a vision in which everyone got killed by those very people. He swallowed. “I told you everything,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Everyone was dead.” He stared hard at Gaara. “Everyone.”
He’d been forced to watch. Unlike the others, he’d been forced to watch as everything he tried failed. As Gaara’s jaw worked, his hands slowly falling to his sides, his eyes growing dim and empty.
“Ah.” Gaara looked away for a moment, his brow scrunching, throwing his eyes into shadow.
All his life, he’d only seen bonds as something to strive for. He’d always wanted them. He still did. But now… now he knew the price of them. If he was weak, he wouldn’t be able to protect those people he loved. He could have all the friends in the world, but if he couldn’t ensure they stayed alive, then what would be the point? He would just face heartache after heartache. Those people out there weren’t just after him – a scary enough thought, considering how easily he’d been caught. They were after Gaara.
Gaara, who may have gotten away from their battle unscratched, but had lost all his sand in the process. Gaara, who didn’t have so many people willing to defend him. If Gaara was alone the next time those guys showed up, what would happen to him?
Naruto thought of that hand wrapped around Gaara’s pale throat and shuddered. No. He knew what would happen.
Feelings flittered over the bond. Surprise and wariness popped like fireworks in those daunting depths. Beneath that, however, and slowly rising like a storm, was something close to giddiness. Was that pink on those pale cheeks? Despite the horrible memories, Naruto smiled. Gaara was happy. Well, of course he was. Naruto knew all about wanting to be acknowledged. When Iruka-sensei had acknowledged and defended him, he’d felt so overwhelmed with joy, like an old wound, festering with pus, had been finally lanced.
He knew what Gaara was feeling right now. This was what it was like to know someone would mourn your passing. That someone cared. That, finally, you weren’t alone.
He touched his chest. His own heart was reacting in response.
This soulmate thing. He’d been right to want it. It was more than he ever could have dreamed.
The change in his soul’s sound was so significant; it was hard to believe that, just a couple of months ago, he’d had no idea who his soulmate was. A couple of weeks ago, he’d still felt a bit jumpy at the sound of the wind, the new addition to his mind. And then, of course, had come the changes as they’d touched. He would be the first to admit that he didn’t know much about this soul bond thing, but even he knew it was weird to go from some howling desert sound to being able to feel Gaara’s wariness as he looked around their enclosure. If he could feel Gaara this well now, after so little time and effort, what would he feel if they continue touching touching each other? A hug, maybe – although Gaara didn’t seem the hugging type – or even… a… kiss?
His face flamed. They weren’t anywhere close to that stage! Were they? No, definitely not! They’d only just started getting to know one another; they were only one encounter removed from fighting one another. There was no way they were ready for that!
Naruto took several deep breaths, then peeked back over to Gaara. Though, if he were completely honest with himself, he had to admit that Gaara was… striking. Okay, he was really good-looking. Like, Sasuke’s level of good-looking. And he was exotic. Like, not because he was from the desert, but because of that bright, flashy red hair and his sleepy panda eyes that were so darkened by shadow they looked like they had make-up on them and his weird eyes with pupils so small you could hardly see them. And then the scar on his forehead – couldn’t forget that.
Soulmates didn’t have to do those kinds of things, but Naruto thought it might be nice to kiss Gaara, after all.
Gaara looked at him. Naruto jumped and squeaked. “What?” Gaara asked. Naruto felt something in the back of his mind. It felt like trepidation. Or nerves.
He flushed horribly. He tried to cover it by pointing at Gaara. “What, what? Nothing! I wasn’t thinking anything!”
Gaara looked away. Great. He couldn’t feel anything big from Gaara, so he could only hope Gaara didn’t feel anything, either. That would be good.
Something bent around the walls of the frog’s throat around them. Gaara glared at the side of the wall. He stepped toward the indentation. Naruto gulped. Gaara was out of sand. If he had any left, then it was only that which covered his skin and the gourd on his back. That meant he was limited in what he could do. It would be up to Naruto to take those guys down.
He put his fingers together and made a few clones. Quickly, he transformed a couple of them into Gaara.
There wasn’t much he could do. But he was stronger now. And Gaara’s life was on the line. He could do this. He had to. That illusion would never come true.
The wall caved in deeper, then split. Naruto sent his clone out as soon as it did, not waiting to see who it was. He caught a glimpse of a black cloak before he had to focus on what his clones were doing.
This guy wasn’t the same one they’d fought before. This one was the one who’d been led off by Jiraiya, the one with the freakishly long sword that was tied up with bandages like it was injured. It was probably Naruto just seeing things, but it almost looked like that sword had a mouth.
“Huh,” the man said, looking around with a grin. His teeth looked like the blades of a saw. “It worked. Nicely done, Itachi.”
The man ducked below Naruto’s clone’s fist, his sword already swooping down. Naruto ordered the clone to dodge, but – but even though he swore it did, it popped out of existence. That left him with only one more that looked like him and two more that looked like Gaara.
“Now, now, kid! No need for that.” The man grinned wide as the sword – the sword’s mouth opened and closed. A tongue hung out. Naruto blanched.
“Hey, what is that freaky thing?!”
“Eh?” The man looked at his sword. “Samehada?” He chuckled. “Quite the sword, isn’t it? It has quite the appetite. Thanks for the meal, by the way.” The man looked at his clones. “Well. It’s easy to guess which one’s you, at least.”
Naruto scowled. Gaara was giving off a lot of weird vibes; Naruto couldn’t make them out, but he thought they were all telling Naruto to back away. Naruto tried to give off his own vibes in response – he knew what he was doing; he had a plan. Just believe in me! I got this!
He put his fingers together again. “Really?” the creepy dude asked. “More clones? Are you trying to give Samehada a feast?”
“Shut up!”
He’d never tried this before. Then again, almost everything he ever did, he did without ever trying it before. In his mind, he called out to Gaara, trying to somehow tell him what to do without words.
With enough bunshins, the room would be filled with smoke. This guy would still be focused on the one he thought was the real Naruto; that one would be targeted first. Naruto scowled and yanked on the chakra within him. The perverted sage had told him he had more chakra than the average person. That was perfect for him; if he ended up feeding this guy and his creepy sword, then fine! He could just make more.
All he needed was to win. This guy could glut himself, for all he cared.
He filled the frog’s throat with bunshins, until they could hardly move for them. Several popped out of existence the moment they got too close to the blue-skinned dude, but that was fine. He ordered his bunshins to start shouting, then made one of them give his message out loud to Gaara, just in case.
“Ah, shut up, already!” the dude said, swinging his sword around. One swing took out four of Naruto’s bunshins, cutting off their jeers mid-sentence. The man ducked low and swiped across the necks of two others. More jumped over the attack, mocking the miss. The sword grinned widely.
Gaara nodded. “Fine,” he said, and with his permission, Naruto went to work.
The pink flesh around them took on a decidedly blue tint. So long as his bunshins held on long enough, the enclosed space around them would actually work in Naruto’s advantage. He kept an eye on the black-cloaked dude, but otherwise got his bunshins to work.
He wasn’t sure how possible it was. Theoretically, his clones were able to do basically the same things he could. And it wasn’t like he couldn’t follow what they were doing. But it took a lot of chakra to make even a single rasengan, and it required a lot of control. He charged up to the guy, ducking beneath his sword to land a punch on his side. The weirdo grunted and turned to him. Naruto sent three bunshins to distract him and faded into the background again.
He traded spots with his bunshins, even as their numbers waned and waned. The sword grew and grew and grew, chomping down on his chakra like it was at a buffet. His head starting feeling a little dizzy right around the time the walls turned bright, bright blue. The dude finally clued in to something happening and looked around. “What the…?”
Naruto heaved a heavy breath. It was a clone who spoke. “Heh!” Even though he was exhausted, he lifted his head high. “You’ve finally noticed, huh?”
The clones remaining stood in pairs around the long hall that made up their encroached safe space; orb after orb of compressed chakra filled their palms, countless hands working the shapes to ensure they stayed together. All of his clones were in the same basic state as him – gasping for breath, struggling to hold themselves upright. But they had rasengans, and this space was tiny enough that they could do some damage. If only they could hit. The sword was ripping through its bandages, the body of it dark and spiked. It was tall enough, big enough, that its spikes scraped both the top and the bottom of the frog’s throat. It seemed to be feeding even on the frog itself.
Naruto heaved in breath after breath. His clones were in just as bad a shape; several of the rasengans were wobbling out of their concentrated state; if he wanted to do this, it had to be now.
He charged. The dude backed up to the edge of the frog’s stomach and whipped the sword in front of him. It was big enough to block Naruto’s sight of the guy altogether. The sword sucked up the first two rasengans with a loud slurp, its mouth gaping so wide the spikes shot down like a goatee toward the floor as it licked up his chakra. Naruto jumped in with the rest of his clones and tried to find an open space.
Gaara’s sand wrapped around the man’s ankle and pulled.
Naruto crowed as the man gave an aborted shout and tipped over. His sword scraped across the floor of the throat. He caught himself with one hand and a knee, but by then, it was too late.
Naruto’s clones dropped their fumbling rasengans to grab the man’s arm and hold it back. The man was crazy strong – no surprise, really, what with the size of that sword now – and started dragging Naruto’s clones even as they dug in their heels. Gaara’s sand yanked on the man’s ankle again.
Naruto saw it. He saw it just in time to land to the man’s right and turn, as the blue-skinned weirdo’s gaze tracked the line of sand to its source. “Gaara!”
The man grinned. “Even if it’s just one!” he said, and ran forward.
“No!” Naruto chased after him. His clones tried to stop him, grab him, use their rasengans – but the things were fizzing out, whirling apart in their hands – too much, it was too much and he couldn’t hold them together – and then the man was in front of Gaara, two more of Naruto’s bunshins turned to dust in the man’s wake, and that gigantic sword was crashing down on Gaara’s head, too big and too spiked for Gaara to block with so little sand left.
Gaara disappeared in a poof of smoke.
“Wha?”
The dude stared down at the space in front of him, trying to put the pieces together. Gaara’s sand still floated around the smoke, turning it almost orange as the sand fizzed in the air. The smoke dissipated, leaving nothing – nothing, because the one the man had attacked had been Naruto’s clone, with Gaara’s sand purposefully moved to it to make the decoy more realistic.
And now the man’s back was open, his sword on the ground, his defenses, for a split second, down.
“Suck on this!” Naruto said, just as the man started turning to face him. “Rasengan!”
He hit the guy full in the back; the sword he held opened its mouth wide, its tongue slurping up the chakra from Naruto’s attack even as the man took it to the spine and went flying. The sword, heavy enough to weigh down the man’s side, slid against the frog’s throat, dragging one side of the guy back as he sailed into the wall. He splatted face-first against it, yet, when he landed, one hand still clung to the hilt of that freakish sword. Naruto landed on both feet. In the next moment, he fell to one knee.
Inside him, something red and angry turned its beady eye on him.
He sucked in a breath. His chakra was almost out. With its loss, he could feel the rise of the kyuubi within him. It knew he was tired. He gritted his teeth. The last thing he needed was to lose himself to it now. Gaara was still in danger. Even now, the guy was struggling to get his hands beneath him and pick himself up. He needed to do something. Something else. Something more.
His fingers clenched around his knee. He used the last of his strength to stand once more.
If he was going to die, he wouldn’t do it lying down with his soulmate slaughtered right in front of him.
“Gaara!”
Temari’s voice?
Naruto turned to the sound, only to nearly be blown back by a sudden wave of wind. He raised his hand and ducked low. Something flittered across the back of his mind – relief. Something tickled the hairs on his right arm. He looked over to see the strands of Gaara’s sand sifting in the air beside him. A quick conglomeration, prepared to protect him as much as possible from the blow they’d both seen coming. He looked over to Gaara. His face looked nearly the same as ever, only – only, this time, Naruto could swear he could see those lips slightly parted, that empty brow less furrowed. He could see Gaara’s relief on his face.
Because that sand would not have been enough.
Temari raced up to them, passing by him to stand just before both Naruto and Gaara, placing herself as their shield. Kankuro came next, a second, skinnier puppet held before him. An arm with a long stinger went soaring for the enemy’s neck. The guy swatted it away with his monster sword. He missed the thing, yet it collapsed to the ground and didn’t move. Kankuro cursed.
“Are you all right?!” Temari asked.
Naruto looked around. How did they get into… but the walls were gone. He blinked. “The frog…” he said.
“Gone. Jiraiya-sama asked us to come to your aid.”
Naruto sank back to one knee in wonder. His heart triphammered in his chest. They were back outside, suddenly, the desert sky filled with sunlight, the streets lined with Suna nin. He couldn’t see Jiraiya or the other attacker, but he could see a wake of destruction down one street – carts tipped over, a door smashed, scratches along one wall – that told him where they’d gone.
The guy who’d been fighting him backed away at the sight of so many before him. He grimaced. “Next time,” he said. His back didn’t straighten fully. Still, he remained conscious, still standing despite Naruto’s rasengan. That alone would have been terrifying if it weren’t for that crazy sword, still bloated from its feast, its mouth wide in a saw-toothed smile.
The man held up a hand. “Stop him!” one of the Suna nin yelled. They raced out to grab the cloaked guy, but a swirl of water encapsulated him and burst forth, and he was gone. The Sun nin cursed. “Spread out and find him!”
Naruto sank fully to the ground as several nin raced off to do as told. He curled onto his side. His eyelids were heavy. “Ah,” he said. “I’m so tired.”
“Naruto? Are you hurt?” He heard Temari kneel down beside him, but couldn’t summon up the energy to open his eyes or answer. Already he could feel the pull of sleep, the demand for energy that he’d lost.
“He’s uninjured,” Gaara said. That voice came closer. Naruto heard the calm desert wind decrease in pressure still more as Gaara approached. “He’s just tired. He used up most of his chakra keeping that man at bay.”
“And you?” she asked. Naruto smiled a little at the question. He was glad. Gaara finally had somebody to worry about him. He knew what that was like. He thought of Iruka-sensei, the first person to actually get angry when Naruto showed up with bumps and cuts and bruises from some harebrained prank of his. Iruka-sensei would spend just as much time yelling at him for getting himself hurt as he would for Naruto breaking the rules.
So Gaara had that now, too. That was great. Gaara deserved it.
He felt Gaara pick up on his feelings, as if he could somehow see Gaara’s attention turn inward, toward him. A soft wave of emotion flowed through their link.
Yes, Gaara had someone. And he was so very, very grateful.
For a moment, just before he slipped into slumber, he thought that gratitude might have been directed, not at Temari, but toward him. The thought was ridiculous, but it still made him feel warm. He slipped easily into sleep.
It felt like years before he opened his eyes again, but anger and panic made him wake up. He burst upright, hardly taking in his surroundings – brown, and orange, and hot – before a hand gripped his arm. Instantly, he felt every single emotion, just as before, stronger and more vibrant than ever, almost teeming with color and light. Gaara. Angry, and a little afraid. Filled with trepidation and torn on what he should do, yet steadfastly choosing Naruto’s side. Gaara hauled him to his feet, his grip tighter as he did, and Naruto saw.
He was asleep. Jiraiya knelt beside him, checking him over. The old man gave him a clean bill of health, and despite the fact that Gaara had known, had felt that Naruto hadn’t been injured, past the wound to his mind and heart by the Uchiha, still he felt an immeasurable sense of relief. He’d been carefully watching every inhalation of breath Naruto had made as he’d slept. A reminder to himself that Naruto was still alive. That the wind in his mind would not die out.
Jiraiya had made to pick Naruto up when several Suna nin came up to them. Gaara had recognized the looks on their faces instantly. So, as he rewatched the scene, did Naruto.
“What the hell have you brought to our doorstep?”
Naruto recognized the speaker as the one who’d barred him from entering the city when he and Jiraiya had first arrived. What was his name? Jarpin? He recognized Jarpin, and the look on Jarpin’s face. The one that said the very clouds came because of Gaara’s existence in their city. Their city. Not his.
“Those were cloaks of the Akatsuki. Those people were after you and your mate.” The man spat the words you and mate like he’d eaten something rotting. “It’s thanks to you that we have these people in our city, damaging our homes.”
Jiraiya stepped forward, one hand out. “Actually, I would say it was likely our fault. They seemed to have followed us.”
Jarpin turned on Jiraiya. “You shouldn’t be here. He shouldn’t have a mate.”
Even though he was watching all of this from Gaara’s memories, anger boiled up within him. At the time of the man’s outburst, however, he’d still been lying dormant on the ground. “I understand your anger,” Jiraiya said, holding both his hands out now as if asking for a surrender. “But these people said themselves that they’d been planning an attack for some time.”
“Be that as it may,” someone said, stepping forward. Naruto saw a group of old people, mostly men. Everyone parted to let them pass. One, with eyebrows so thick they covered the man’s eyes from view, spoke. “It remains that Akatsuki attacked our village because you are here. You and that… child,” the old man said, turning his head toward Naruto’s prone form, “are to leave this country immediately. And never come back.”
Naruto stood stunned. Speechless. Angry. Hurt. Rebellious. Like hell.
“We’ll take our leave for now,” Jiraiya said, and the old man dropped his arms. For the first time, Naruto noticed a missing piece of cloth from the man’s right arm. He’d gotten hurt? “But we won’t take your edict to not return. That can only be handed out by your kazekage.”
The old man frowned at him. Naruto held his breath. “You are not welcome here,” he said, and Jiraiya snorted.
“Akatsuki will be back, whether we’re here or not. As for whether we’re welcome or not, well. As I said. That’s up to your kazekage, whether it would be prudent to blacklist members of Konoha simply because the one who stopped your Gaara from going on a rampage also happens to be his soulmate.” Jiraiya dared step toward the old man. “Now, if your next kazekage, or perhaps your daimyo, were to give such an edict, we would be forced to follow it. Though I wonder how that would look.”
A stare-off began. Gaara’s gaze flitted around, however, taking in the ninja around them and the positions they’d taken. Even Naruto could tell they’d deliberately surrounded Naruto and Gaara. He watched Gaara lean down, lightning-quick, and grab his arm.
The scenes flashed through his mind in an instant. In the next, he was being pulled to his feet, Gaara’s gaze already moving to flash once more across the faces surrounding them. The little bit of Gaara’s sand circled around his fingers. It seemed to be unconscious; Gaara’s mind was flashing out signals of run and go. And yet he held on to Naruto tight.
If he stayed, things would get even harder for Gaara. Yet he didn’t want to abandon him. “No matter what,” he said, catching Gaara’s attention. No matter what. I’ll come back for you.
No need. Naruto heard the intention more than the words; it was as if wordless thoughts were being sent to him, and his mind – or maybe his heart – was translating them. I’ll become stronger. Things will be different when we meet again.
That meant Gaara intended to meet him again. That was what mattered. “If not here, then Konoha,” he said, and turned. Jiraiya was practically spitting at the old man’s feet. The old man turned away just as Naruto said, “I’m glad.” I’m glad I came to see you. I’m glad I have a soulmate. I’m glad it’s you.
Gaara’s eyes widened.
“Come on, Naruto. We have to check on the new hokage.”
In other words, they were leaving because it was convenient for them. Not because they’d been ordered. Naruto lifted his chin, pointedly saying, “Tsunade-baba? She should be fine, right?”
Jiraiya snorted. “Sure, if she’s not driving her constituents crazy.” The old man eyed their still-joined hands.
It was time to leave. Already. Naruto had only just gotten to see Gaara again! It wasn’t fair! And those guys – Naruto knew they were after Gaara as well as him. They’d done their best, but neither of them had been strong enough to defeat the two. What would happen when they were apart?
I’ll get stronger. Naruto looked up. Gaara’s eyes pierced him. I’ll get stronger, and I’ll come back for you.
Naruto stared. Then smirked. You won’t have to. I’ll get stronger, too. Then I’ll come back, and nothing these old farts say will keep me away. Believe me!
Finally, finally, Gaara let go. I do.
“Come on.” Jiraiya reached out for his shoulder, slowly steering him away. Naruto went, only turning from Gaara once Temari and Kankuro had blocked him from the villagers’ view. Then he glared at them all as they sneered him on his way.
Oh, yeah. He would definitely be back.
Chase the Wind, Ch. 8 (GaaNaruGaa)
Title: Chase the Wind Chapter: Eight Fandom: Naruto Pairing: Gaara/Naruto Rating: T Words: ~5800
Summary: Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was.
Note: I own nothing. The title is derived from “Touch the Sky” by Julie Fowlis. I was torn between that and “if I gotta be damned, I wanna be damned with you” from Meatloaf’s “Bat Out Of Hell.”
Chase the Wind - Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was. (GaaNaru) One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven
Finally, he’d managed to return to Konoha. It had taken so long; he’d been run all over the place, back and forth, until he felt almost ragged and worn. He stepped into the village, amazed to see nothing had changed. Or, well, perhaps something. He couldn’t find any evidence of any of his pranks. He’d been gone long enough for them to be washed away. That would have to be fixed.
The town lay open and bright before him. Trees. Normal levels of sunlight. Color on the walls of the buildings. He breathed in deep, tasting the forest around him. A breeze played with his hair, so refreshingly cool it nearly made him shiver. He grinned and hurried forward. He made it to Ichiraku Ramen before he stopped cold.
He was hungry. Well, not hungry hungry, but he was always hungry for ramen, especially if he hadn’t had any from Ichiraku in a while. He practically bounced inside, barely bothering to push away the curtain, only to stop. His grin slid away. No one stood behind the counter. He looked back and forth, as if Teuchi or Ayame might be on the edge of his vision, or might be hiding. “Ayame-san?” He went to stand beside one of the stools. “Teuchi-san?”
Nothing.
He frowned. “Hey! Where are you guys?” He stood up on the stool and peered over the counter. An inarticulate scream rose in his throat. “Ayame-san!” He jumped over the counter. Ayame lay motionless on the ground, her hair spilled from her bun and washed along the ground like a halo. Blood caked the ground around her. He grabbed her head and pulled her up. “Ayame-san!” He looked around, only to find Teuchi-san collapsed mere feet away, his cap on the ground beside him. His apron was dirty. He’d never seen it dirty before.
He looked back to Ayame. Even though he’d moved her, still she didn’t so much as flutter her eyelashes. He put a hand to her throat. No swallowing. Her chest didn’t rise and fall. She felt a bit cool to the touch. Fingers shaking, he checked her heartbeat. Nothing.
Slowly, he put her down, his eyes wide to stop the tears. He ran quickly to Teuchi-san, only to find the same thing. No movement. No warmth. No heartbeat. A deep, purple-black bruise over his neck.
No life.
He leaped over the counter and ran into the street, looking both ways. “Someone! Someone help!”
No one. There was no one around. His heart thundered in his chest. Konoha was never so empty that no one could hear him when he shouted. Heck, by now someone would be coming out to glare at him and demand just what he’d done this time. But nothing. He couldn’t find anyone, even though he ran into the buildings nearby. Empty – except, no, that wasn’t quite right. He could see one of the waiters lying on the ground, sitting in what he wished was spilled wine. He’d gone to check on the man, but no. More blood. Another dead.
What the hell had happened while he’d been gone?
He ran further into the town, his heart in his throat. He shouted again and again as he ran, only to find no one. No one answered his call. He was about to take to the rooftops when he finally found more signs of life.
No. Not life at all.
He stopped still. Blood drained from his face so quickly he felt dizzy. “No. No!” He raced forward. The bodies along the main street, having obviously attempted to head for the Hokage Mountain, were almost too small to be splayed. They were all clumped together, so packed Naruto could only see the one body beneath the others because of that long, blue scarf. He checked body after body, growing sicker with each passing moment. Children, all of them; their blood coagulated in the streets, nothing more than a giant pile. He was halfway through the throng when he realized they never would have been left alone. No. Iruka-sensei would have… would have…
His body lay just one meter away, before the turn in the road. Kunai and shuriken dotted his chest and legs. Blood caked the ground, the buildings. His hairtie had come loose. He’d tried to buy the children time.
Naruto screamed.
He ran, nearly tripping, splashing in the blood until it spattered his pants. Already, he knew how this would end. He knew Iruka-sensei would be as dead as everyone else. Yet he couln’t help but run. He couldn’t help but grab Iruka-sensei up into his arms and – no, no, he was too cold, too cold and lifeless – no, no, no, no…
Naruto cradled his teacher’s body to his chest. Tears streamed down his face. This couldn’t be happening. He should have returned to the village sooner. He should have known better. He should have been here to do something. Why hadn’t he been here? Why had this happened? How? Who could have done this, when even Orochimaru had failed?
This couldn’t be happening. If whoever had attacked the village had managed to get to the students, then that – what did that mean for the ninja who should have been there to ensure it didn’t happen?
He stood, his mind nearly empty as he left Iruka-sensei’s body behind. His gaze fixed on the road Iruka-sensei had been turned toward, the path he’d tried to block. Wind whistled in his ears; the very earth around him seemed to flake into dust. If only. If only it had. If it had, he wouldn’t have ever been able to see more.
Bodies. Bodies too numerous to count.
He saw masks on the ground – ANBU. Beside them, familiarly-cloaked bodies lay, equally broken and bleeding. Further back were more bodies. More of Konoha’s ninja. There were far fewer black-cloaked people back there, but there were plenty of shorter bodies. Younger. Naruto shivered. His hands shook. He could see blood on them. Ayame-san’s blood, and Iruka’s. And everyone’s.
He knew what he would find if he went closer. He knew he would count his friends among the dead. He knew, knew from the horrible silence all around him, that no one had survived. He knew. Still, he stepped forward. The stench of blood was so great, it overwhelmed him. His footsteps splashed.
At first, it was just adults. The last wave of ANBU, undoubtedly assigned to protect Konohamaru and the other students, had managed to take down a good many of the black-cloaked people like the ones who had attacked him and Gaara. Their bodies had crumpled along the sides of the road. Naruto wondered if the ones who’d attacked him were among the dead. Wondered if they’d made it back before him. Wondered if they’d killed some of his friends with their own hands.
Jounin lay scattered around the Chuunin’s corpses. Kurenai-sensei, Gai-sensei. Next to Gai lay Lee, their bodies so close they nearly touched, Gai-sensei just barely in front of Lee – guarding him. Trying to guard him. Just beyond them were Neji and Tenten, and beside them, before Naruto reached Asuma-sensei and a few more ANBU, were Ino, Chouji, and Shikamaru, their clothes torn in half from what looked like wounds from some massive blade.
Beyond there, bodies and buildings looked to have been blown back by some extraordinary force. Little more than kindling remained of the nearly homes; from the open skyline Naruto could see, likely the buildings behind those had been destroyed, as well. Bodies – body parts – lay scattered over the remains. And under the remains. And in pieces on the sides of the street. He couldn’t help but look at each one, wondering if he would–
And he did. One body part – a torso and a left leg – wore a very familiar red cloth over tight shorts. He closed his eyes and stopped moving. No. No, no. He didn’t want to see this.
The wind howled through the scattered buildings. Like a ghost town, it whistled through the cracks of Konoha’s broken buildings. The smell of blood was overwhelming. No one moved. No one silenced the empty stillness. No one could. Everyone was dead.
He opened his eyes and scanned the area again, knowing. Knowing, and yet hoping, anyway. This street once led back toward the shopping district, toward the lesser venues like the flower shop and the pottery store. Shops that he could already tell no longer stood. Shops that likely buried their dead the same way Sakura-chan’s…
He whimpered as he saw them.
He’d always known Sasuke wasn’t actually as invincible as he’d sometimes seemed. The battle with Gaara had proven that. Yet somehow it seemed so unnatural that he be so still, so broken. His limbs lay in positions so awkward, it was clear he’d been broken before he’d been killed. Kakashi-sensei lay by his side. His sharingan – Sasuke’s sharingans, as well – had been plucked out.
He didn’t bother going to them. He just collapsed.
The air was caked with the scent of blood. Out here, in the sun, the corpses were beginning to smell, as well; rot and feces and bad meat, all rolled into one. He closed his eyes, wishing he could blot out every sense. Wishing he could blot out the world, time itself, and start the day over again. He curled into a ball and screamed and screamed and screamed. No one heard him. No one was left. Whoever remained from this battle, they were not of Konoha. These people in these cloaks had taken everything, only to vanish again.
Gaara.
Viscerally, desperately, he wanted his soulmate. He snapped his head up. Gaara. How had that battle ended again? What had happened to Gaara?
He couldn’t remember. He couldn’t remember if his soulmate was still alive or not. Oh, god.
He stumbled to his feet. “Gaara?” His voice choked. It barely traveled the space around him, choked as it was on the tears on his lips. “Gaara?!” He looked around. He – he could hear him. Through the whistling wind, he could hear the desert air howling within him. He thought he could feel Gaara, too, if he tried. He seemed scared. Gaara. Scared. God, no. “Gaara! Answer me!”
He turned around and around in circles. Surely he could sense which way Gaara was, right? If they were supposed to be linked, then he should be able to find him. What was the point otherwise?
But he couldn’t. He couldn’t, and his soulmate was afraid. How much longer did he have until Gaara, too–
The desert sands scraped along his eardrums. He turned. The block-cloaked man with the sharingan stood before him. One hand, outstretched, held Gaara out by his throat. Some desperate sound escaped the back of Naruto’s throat. “Let him go!”
The man’s grip only tightened; Naruto froze where he was, eyes wide as they took in Gaara’s beaten form. His gourd was gone; Naruto couldn’t find his sand anywhere, even though Gaara had never been without it before. Blood ran down from Gaara’s scalp, a deeper, darker shade than his hair. Naruto whimpered. Gaara’s eyes were open, but they weren’t focused. His body hung limp. His arms looked broken. “What do you want?” Naruto asked, his voice a whisper.
“I want the Kyuubi.” The man shook Gaara. “The sand demon, as well.”
The sand demon meant Gaara. How… how could he protect Gaara? What could he do to make sure Gaara got out of here alive?
He looked around. He’d seen a lot of cloaked corpses spattered among his own. How may were there? That friend of his, the one the perverted sage had drawn away – was he there? Was he dead? Where was Jiraiya, anyway?
“Pay attention, Naruto. I don’t want you to miss this.” His gaze snapped back to the man. He lurched forward at the sign of those fingers digging deep into the pale skin of Gaara’s neck. Gaara’s teeth clenched against one another; his gaze sharpened for an instant. Gaara caught sight of him. His mouth opened, but nothing came out. Naruto didn’t think he could speak, either. His heart had lodged itself in his throat.
“Don’t.” The man raised his other hand. “Don’t!” He ran.
Naruto!
Light burst behind his eyes. Emotions shot like starlight. Fear. Worry. Anger. Frustration. They pounded thickly at the back of his mind, beating some sort of pulsing rhythm against the walls that made him who he was. As if something had speared into his head and was pounding at the edges of his brain. The desert rose to a storm. He choked on it. Stumbled.
“Pay attention, Naruto.”
Naruto, listen to me.
“Don’t hurt Gaara!”
He screamed, and finally, something answered. Something red and furious. The Kyuubi. He called for it, and it came.
It roared. He heard it, felt it in his bones. It rose like a demon, unfurled its chakra around him, and exploded. This time when he screamed, it was a guttural snarl. The man before him took a single step back. His first sign of fear. Naruto glared at him. There would be more.
The man squeezed Gaara’s neck until that mouth opened and closed. Gaara’s arms tried to raise to grab at the man’s fingers. Naruto ran forward.
All he could see was red.
Naruto simply stood there.
He didn’t move. He didn’t attack. He didn’t so much as blink.
The man stared at him. Simply stared, and didn’t try to avoid Naruto’s ninjutsu, which still remained trembling in his hand. Something Gaara hadn’t seen before, though he could feel the power of it. The man looked into Naruto’s eyes, and Naruto – Naruto had unwittingly looked back. The man had jumped in front of him. Naruto hadn’t stood a chance.
He would think Naruto paralyzed, only he could feel Naruto’s emotions, and they were intense. Horror. Terror. Anguish. Even as he watched, tears pooled and fell down Naruto’s cheeks.
Something was happening. This man was attacking Naruto, in a way that Gaara couldn’t see. A genjutsu? A vision? It didn’t matter. He needed to get Naruto free.
He attacked. His bubble of sand protected him, but it didn’t help Naruto. For once, he thought his instinct to protect himself was worthless. What was the point of being able to shield himself from harm if he couldn’t also shield those around him? If he couldn’t keep Naruto from falling victim to the same person he’d deemed dangerous enough to avoid himself? Now he was safe, and Naruto was hurting, and he could have used his sand to protect Naruto instead of himself, if only he’d thought to care.
The man didn’t move from in front of Naruto. He didn’t move his gaze. Gaara’s eyes narrowed. The man held off his sand with his kunai and a quick movement of his fingers, creating a bunshin that burst into crows when attacked.
He used the attack as a diversion and covered Naruto’s eyes with his sand, careful to close them lest they get sand in them and burn. With something like an explosion, the bubble Gaara had wrapped himself in burst forth, scattering sand in every direction. Finally, the man turned back to him. Gaara kept his own eyes closed and used the eye he’d created to watch the man’s actions instead. Then he ran.
The Uchiha turned to him, his bunshin forming to get in between Gaara and Naruto – why? How? – only to be met with Temari’s fan. “Go!” Temari said, and shoved the bunshin away. It scattered into pieces once more.
Gaara managed to get to Naruto’s side. He grabbed the wrist not still holding the ninjutsu. The chakra was beginning to break apart, no longer worked into a tight ball by Naruto’s clone, who had disappeared the moment his eyes had connected with the Uchiha’s. “Naruto!” he hissed.
Nothing. No response. Yet he could feel him, more strongly than ever, as their souls leaned toward one another, finally in contact once more. The urge to get even closer, to hold Naruto to him and not let go, was nearly overwhelming. He hissed in a breath and gripped Naruto’s shoulders. “Naruto, listen to me.”
No, that wasn’t right. It wasn’t about trying to reach Naruto physically. It was his mind that was being attacked. He took a deep breath. Thankfully, of all people in this world, he was the one who could reach that place.
He wrapped his sand around the two of them. “Can you handle him?” he asked, his voice rumbling out as he watched Naruto’s face.
In answer, Temari called for Kankuro.
His sand locked them inside its shell.
Naruto still didn’t move. His attack, whatever it was, still sat in his hand. Gaara eyed it for a moment before deciding it wasn’t going anywhere or about to explode. Slowly, he pulled his sand away from his hands, leaving them bare to the air for the first time since he’d returned from Konoha. Then he shifted his hands up from Naruto’s shoulders to his face.
He expected the wind to get louder, to beat against the edges of his mind as if trying to tear it down. Instead it – it calmed. The pervasive need to be nearer no longer pulled at him, and with that went the blasting rage of the desert. It sounded more… more like it did on quiet mornings, when the air was practically still and the sands sifted in a slow, inexorable slide down the dunes. It felt calm and steady and warm. He sighed into it, his eyes fluttering at the sensation. When before the feeling inside him had seemed restless, now it seemed content. As was he.
Then the feelings came. They shone bright and bold in his mind, a clear link to Naruto’s heart. It pounded thick with blood and fear and pain. They shifted, moved – his body may have been still, but his mind was not. Not paralyzed. Not frozen. Something was happening inside of him. Something that hurt him.
If he could feel Naruto’s agony, then Naruto could feel what he felt, as well. He frowned. At the moment, he felt tense, frustrated. Concerned, because Naruto was not coming back from wherever the Uchiha had placed him.
He dared step closer, until their clothing brushed. He needed to feel something else. Something stronger. He stared at Naruto’s face. He hadn’t realized how startlingly clear those blue eyes had been until he could no longer see them. They’d brought the blond’s face to life. Without them, there was far too much orange and yellow. He looked jaundiced.
What could he possibly send that would reach someone? He didn’t know anything about kindness, anything that might calm Naruto’s fears. He stared at the lines scored into Naruto’s cheeks, the proof of what he carried within him, and thought of his own demon. His own scars.
His own scar.
He didn’t know anything about love. What had such an emotion taught him but betrayal and hate? But he did know admiration. He’d learned of it, and of yearning, after meeting this impossible person. Could he somehow make Naruto feel the esteem Gaara held for him?
He tried to remember how he’d felt, watching Naruto cry for him. No one had ever done such a thing before. No one, not his father, nor his siblings, nor the villagers, nor even Yashamaru when he’d been pretending – no one had ever thought of his pain and cried. Yet this one person, after Gaara had threatened to kill those he loved, looked upon Gaara and wept for what he had suffered.
What he’d felt at the sight didn’t have words. He’d known Naruto was his soulmate, but he’d resigned himself to the idea that they’d been mated because they were both monsters. He’d thought the universe had been playing a cruel trick on him. Instead, he’d been given this gift. Someone who knew him, in ways no one else ever could. Someone who accepted him, even after everything he’d done. Everything he’d become.
He’d never thought someone would ever see him as anything other than a monster or a dangerous tool. He’d certainly never suspected that someone he’d tried to kill, someone he’d tried to take so much from, would ever be the one to see something more.
It left him humbled and shamed in equal measure. It left him feeling lost and empty. Unfulfilled. Who was he, that he could ever try to take something from someone like that? What had he become, to try to kill someone who managed to care about him after all he’d done? And what could he become, when someone who understood him so deeply could be so much more than him?
He wanted to reach for Naruto. He wanted to stand beside him as an equal. He wanted to share in that beauty, to be part of it, to have it shine down on him. He wanted to have what Naruto had. Be what Naruto was. He wanted to return the understanding Naruto had shown him. He wanted to be worthy of it.
He didn’t know what love was. All he knew was that he wanted Naruto to never cry again. He wanted to see Naruto smile, and to protect that smile. Forever.
Naruto’s body jerked against his. Not pulling away, just… reacting. That same reaction left the blond leaning close to him. With his hands occupied, Gaara had to use his head to help hold Naruto up as he struggled for balance. Emotions burst the moment this new contact rose between them. Confusion. Loss. Befuddlement. Contentment.
Gaara?
He almost thought he heard it. He opened his eyes to find that bright blue gaze slowly attempting to focus on him. Naruto nearly sagged against him. “You’re alive,” he breathed.
Gaara sucked in a long, steady breath. “I am,” he said. He looked Naruto up and down. Though he held no exterior wounds, he looked almost completely lost. His body trembled beneath Gaara’s fingers. Carefully, Gaara wrapped one hand around Naruto’s left wrist. “Do you remember what’s happening?”
Naruto blinked. Once. Twice. “He’s here,” he said. He stiffened. The trembling worsened. “He’s still here, isn’t he?”
Gaara’s sand eye still watched outside. Temari wasn’t faring well, but she had Kankuro at her back. They’d done nothing but keep the Uchiha from them, but it was better than being hit. The man had one hand to his eye now, and looked ready for a new strike. “He is.” He nodded to Naruto’s arm. “Can you reach him with that?”
Naruto shook his head. “Not without getting caught again.” The blond shivered beneath his grasp. Gaara wanted to rip something apart. His sand trembled with his rage.
“I can guide you,” Gaara said.
Naruto looked at him. In his eyes, Gaara saw trust.
“Close your eyes.” Without hesitation, Naruto did as told. The power of it thrilled him. The loyalty in it terrified him. “Wait here for my signal. Can you keep that thing going while you wait?”
Naruto nodded. “It’s fully formed, so it’s fine.”
With that answer, he checked once more on his siblings. His lips thinned. “He’s about to attack. It will be big.”
Naruto accepted his words. He shifted from foot to foot. Gaara could feel his trepidation, his desire to know what was going on. That fear he’d felt from Naruto’s mind before he’d awoken remained, just beneath the surface. It waited for its opportunity to return, preying on the corners of Naruto’s mind.
He lowered his sand from around them, though he left some by Naruto’s side, just in case. “Get out of the way,” he said. On instinct, his siblings obeyed. He pushed them further to the side with his sand as the Uchiha opened his eye. He pushed Naruto back with a wave of sand against his chest, as well, then jumped up. His sand churned around his feet, lifting him up just as black flames erupted around them.
His sand eye got burned to cinders, leaving him forced to open his real eyes. He focused on forming another eye, even as he searched for Naruto. At the edge of the building, though the walls and table and even windows were burning. Naruto hadn’t been touched by the fire, but Gaara’s sand – he could feel the fire eating his chakra-infused sand down to the very last grain. What little he had left struggled to transport him away in time.
Temari and Kankuro had to stumble back or else risk losing themselves to the flames. Kankuro sacrificed Karasu in order to buy himself and Temari time to escape through the front door. The Uchiha took down the puppet with a swift kick to its midsection. The kick, filled with chakra, tore apart the careful mechanism of Karasu’s torso, and with it, the puppet fell apart.
Gaara had very little sand left. What little remained rested just in front of Naruto, just below his feet, or against his skin itself. He carefully covered his hands again and stood facing the man before them.
With his sand eye once again floating by his shoulder, he could watch the Uchiha without risking falling into the man’s trap.
If Temari and Kankuro had hoped that their escape would garner some of the man’s attention, they were bound to disappointment; the Uchiha let them go without even looking in their direction. His gaze locked on Gaara. Did he no longer view Naruto as a threat, or was Gaara merely the larger one? Did he know Naruto was no longer trapped in his genjutsu?
He crossed his arms.
Without enough sand to protect Naruto, he was left going on the offensive. A quick lash of sand, swinging low and to the enemy’s right. The enemy dodged, even though his eye was bleeding profusely after his attack. Another sweep, and the man was… it was a sort of movement. Not unlike the substitution jutsu, the man could take a step and, with a sudden push of chakra, move quickly from one stable footing to another, sometimes meters away. This time the man chose to take a step into Gaara’s personal space. He’d been waiting for it.
The sand over his body flashed out. It pecked at the man’s eyes, and, with a surge of chakra, turned to needles and flew. He didn’t bother to dodge away; the Uchiha was forced to back away from the assault, flashing quickly to avoid his sand. With the remains of his home in the way, he was easily able to move the man where he wanted him to go. “Now,” he said, and sent a wave of conviction toward that warm sound deep within him.
Naruto stepped forward and thrust out his hand.
The Uchiha turned his head, and his body, in time to evade a direct hit. Gaara had prepared for that, as well. He’d been ready for Naruto to manage a glancing blow, after which he would use the sand he’d placed around Naruto to tear off one of the Uchiha’s arms.
What he hadn’t expected was the force of Naruto’s ‘glancing blow.’
It hit. Right along the Uchiha’s left side, just above the dip where the torso met his pelvis. It just barely kept from flipping the man end over end as he went flying back into Gaara’s last wall. The roof teetered. Gaara hurried forward, letting his sand eye collapse as he passed the continuing rubble and the broken edges of his table to reach Naruto. The blond still dutifully kept his eyes closed. “Naruto. We need to run.”
Naruto nodded and grabbed his hand. “Where?” he asked.
Still, his eyes did not open. Gaara touched the blond’s cheek. “Open your eyes.”
Naruto did as bade, his gaze seeking Gaara’s own like a magnet. His heart sped up. He raised his sand to cover the two of them as best he could as rubble broke down around them. It wouldn’t protect them when the larger beams fell, nor keep them from getting buried. “Come with me.” He grabbed Naruto’s wrist and turned. Naruto didn’t fight to get free from him. He simply followed.
The world shook. Something – the wall above the door – creaked, groaned, and bent. Gaara jumped lightly forward; Naruto stumbled for a moment, not ready for Gaara’s sudden movement, but he kept himself from falling. Gaara’s hold tightened. Temari and Kankuro were outside the building, likely engaging their injured attacker. He heard shouts. Temari. He opened his mouth to respond when the world cracked and ripped. He looked up. The ceiling feel to meet them.
“Gaara!”
Naruto pushed him. He nearly managed to keep his balance, only for the floor to suddenly shift and give beneath his feet. He fell, Naruto on top of him, and felt Naruto crawl over him slightly, until the blond had his chest over Gaara’s own and his hands and head protecting Gaara’s. He froze, twin emotions of wonder and mortal terror clawing at his insides. He squirmed, finally, using his sand to grab Naruto and roll him off, tucking the idiot underneath himself where he belonged.
That was when he realized they hadn’t bumped into anything. Nothing toppled down on top of them. He waited another beat, then slowly pulled himself up. Naruto squirmed and wriggled, finally turning enough to face Gaara. “Are you all right?!” he asked. Gaara felt Naruto’s arms writhe beneath him. He got up a bit more, only to have Naruto grab his face and turn it back and forth. Gaara gritted his teeth at the treatment. Concern and, worryingly, more of that panic strung between them, a fiber of feeling connected to the bright, boisterous sound of the wind.
His neck felt like it was going to be twisted off from his body. He grabbed Naruto’s hands to still them. “I’m fine.”
Naruto’s breath heaved. Gaara could feel every exhalation on his face. Those bright blue eyes were so wide, so dilated. Like a rabbit in flight. He wondered if it was possible to send surety over that link in the back of his mind. He tried. Slowly, Naruto’s grip loosened, and his breathing steadied. “You’re okay,” he said. His hands fell. He took a deep breath, then another. “You’re all right.”
“Yes.”
For some reason, his answer took a moment to sink in. When it finally did, Naruto started looking around. His brows drew low. “Where are we?”
Gaara finally pulled his own attention from Naruto’s face to look around. He’d already surmised that they’d likely been transported to somewhere else, but he hadn’t been expecting to find them standing on some sort of goopy substance that lined not just the floor but the walls and ceiling, as well. It traveled far in either direction, a hallway that spanned what could be miles. He took a deep breath and stepped in front of Naruto.
Who had placed this around them? The Uchiha? He hadn’t shown any ability resembling this, but he’d mostly stuck to genjutsu. His ninjutsu skills were still largely unknown. Then there was the Uchiha’s accomplice, who had been engaged by Naruto’s chaperon but may have come at the sound of his friend flying through a wall.
“You two!” They both jumped. Gaara scowled at the old man as he came into view. “Are you quite finished being all lovey-dovey?”
Gaara flushed.
“Ah!” Naruto pointed. “Perverted sage! Where the heck were you?!” Then, an instant later, “don’t go saying pervy stuff!”
The old man rolled his eyes. “That’s a nice thanks for getting you out of there in time.” Gaara stepped slightly out of the way, looking at the stuff around them again. It moved slightly. “Yeah, you’ve probably noticed, Gaara. You’re inside a frog’s throat at the moment.” Naruto made a retching sound and curled his hands into his body. “It protected you from the building that would have come down on your head otherwise.” The old man glared at Naruto. “Be grateful!”
Naruto, of course, was not one to be deterred. “You were fighting for forever! Where were you? That guy was attacking us! He said…” Naruto’s words dwindled. That panic rose up again, so thick it seemed to choke him for a moment. “He said he was looking for me. For Gaara, too. He…”
“He likely wants us for the demons inside of us,” Gaara said. Naruto flinched.
“That’s what I was afraid of,” the old man said. He stepped forward. “For now, the two of you will stay in here.” Naruto made immediate sounds of protest, only to turn to Gaara. He gulped, then nodded. “Good. Always nice to know you’ll listen to reason when it’s important.” Naruto glared at the man. Gaara did, as well. Naruto didn’t need to be needled when he was clearly swallowing his pride. The old man held up his hands. “It’s not an insult. The two of you are what those two are after, and they’ll stop at nothing to get to you. One of them has already used something that shouldn’t be available to anyone. One of the few things that could ever get through a frog’s throat.”
Naruto tensed. “So, what? You’re gonna have us stay here, only to be attacked again?”
“No. You’re going to stay here while I keep them away from you. The fact that one of them can reach you means it’s even more important that you stay here, together.” Jiraiya pointed to the moving floor at their feet. “Got that? Don’t. Try. To leave.”
Naruto flipped the man the bird. “What about Gaara’s family? They’re still out there!”
“I’m going out there now.” Jiraiya pointed at Naruto. “You stay here. I’ll make sure they’re all right.” He pointed at Gaara. “And you.” Gaara lifted his chin. “I get that you’re strong, but right now, you don’t have any of that special sand of yours, and you’re not the only one in danger.”
Gaara looked at Naruto. That panic still threaded along their new link. Whatever else Naruto was, adrenaline-fueled or simply stubborn, he was holding on by a thread. Whatever he’d seen, it had left tears in his mind. Gaara frowned. “I won’t leave.”
“Good.” Jiraiya made a quick succession of seals, starting with the boar. “Take a walk forward. Once this disappears, you’ll be back where you started. Since that’s rubble now, you should head forward about ten meters or so. And don’t worry.” The old man grinned. “I’ll be back for you shortly.”
A tongue wrapped around the old man and pulled him down into the mushy muscle beneath them. He was gone.
Naruto’s fear spiked.
Gaara placed a hand on Naruto’s back. The blond jumped. He tried some sort of fake chuckle. Gaara just waited it out until silence reigned between them. He placed pressure on Naruto’s back. Once again, with some sort of intrinsic trust, Naruto let Gaara lead him forward. A measured pace, careful steps, and Gaara had them both exactly ten meters out from where they’d begun. Then he turned to Naruto. “Tell me,” he said. Naruto met his gaze with wide eyes. “Tell me what he made you see.”
Chase the Wind, Ch. 06/?? (GaaNaruGaa)
Title: Chase the Wind Chapter: Six Fandom: Naruto Pairing: Gaara/Naruto Rating: T Words: ~5000
Summary: Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was.
Note: I own nothing. The title is derived from “Touch the Sky” by Julie Fowlis. I was torn between that and “if I gotta be damned, I wanna be damned with you” from Meatloaf’s “Bat Out Of Hell.”
Chase the Wind - Since before he could even remember, Gaara had heard the sound of the howling wind in his mind. He always wished he could find the person on the other end of that sound, that elusive being who might love him for who he was. (GaaNaru) One | Two | Three | Four | Five
It had been only a couple of weeks, and yet Gaara was starting to understand what he’d lost when he’d decided to love only himself.
It wasn’t something he could be upset with himself for. Even now, it seemed obvious to choose that route when he’d faced nothing but despair. But after only two weeks, his sister had accepted him as if he’d never threatened to kill her on a weekly basis. His brother stuck around without constantly edging toward the door.
Little else had changed. No one viewed him as someone to be trusted. Not yet. But the acceptance he’d gained from his sister, from Kankuro, and, to a small extent, from Baki, as well (though the man seemed to genuinely not care, so long as his work didn’t suffer), gave him hope that the path Naruto had showed him was not for the blond alone.
He stood on the edge of the desert’s more rocky shores, looking out above the sand as the sun crested its highest hills. He could hear, in his mind, an echo of the wind as it caressed his hair. He knew the scar on his forehead showed vividly against his pale skin as his bangs blew back.
“Gaara.”
He didn’t turn at his brother’s voice. He’d seen him coming, had heard each soft footstep as he’d neared. The sky burst into color, the gray turning red and gold and fire-orange. It reminded him of his soulmate’s hair and clothes. It reminded him of his own heart, locked cold and buried until that one loud, bright star had burst before him. “Good morning,” he said, and meant it.
“I heard you want to take the position of the next Kazekage.”
He still didn’t turn. Yes, it was true. He’d spoken with Temari and Baki over the logistics of it. Technically, the position was supposed to fall to the first son, but Kankuro had been reluctant. Baki insisted Kankuro would have little choice in the matter; Suna’s leader was chosen from the first’s male descendants, and their father had had no siblings. His mother’s sibling was dead. That left Kankuro… or Gaara. Temari had been the one to bring that up. And with it had come an idea so preposterous, it could only have spawned after meeting an impossible boy. “That’s right.”
A long silence. The sun gleamed, limned in liquid gold, the waves of heat rippling in the sky until the sunlight danced with the dunes. “Why?” the man finally asked.
He’d chosen new garb a few days ago. Even he wasn’t yet used to the feel of it. It stretched around his skin in odd places, hung loose in others. But it was no longer black and red. Instead it stood out in bright maroon and white. The colors felt better around him somehow. Less restricting. And it helped that it made him, as Temari said, ‘look good.’ He wanted to look less threatening. He also wanted, if he ever met Naruto again, to look… well, dashing. It was another strange concept he had yet to grasp. He liked it, though. An anticipation not unlike that of a battlefield.
“I want to work hard and become an existence acknowledged by other people,” he said, barely answering his brother’s question. “I… thought that, looking at Uzumaki Naruto. Looking at my soulmate.” The stiffening from behind him gave him a small sort of satisfaction. He’d never spoken of the idea of soulmates, let alone the fact that he had one. He’d only told one man, and that man had tried to kill him. There had been little point of speaking on it afterward; he’d had no intention of meeting anyone, or of letting them leave his acquaintance alive if he had. Uzumaki Naruto, however, defied every and all expectations.
“Soulmate?” Kankuro asked. His voice was low, almost a whisper, as if to speak louder would be to break some sort of spell.
“That’s right. Before now – before being defeated by him – I’d always seen ties with other people as little more than hate. A desire to kill. But, if only just a little, I’ve begun to understand those bonds the way he experiences them.” The sun nearly hurt his eyes. He stared for only a moment more before looking out over the wide expanse of the sky. The red and gold had taken over the full horizon, chased away the last vestiges of gray. No clouds marred its calm seas. The very sand seemed brighter, oranger, more golden in its presence. “Those ties…” He smiled. For some reason, he found himself thinking of Temari, of those marron glacé things she’d made. They’d tasted atrocious. “Suffering, sorrow. Happiness. They can all be shared with someone.”
He wanted to see Naruto again. But he wanted to do it right this time. He didn’t want to be remembered as the soulmate who tried to kill his other half. He didn’t want Naruto to remember him that way. He wanted to show that he could be something more. Something that Naruto needed, just as much as Naruto had been what he’d needed. That meant he would have to wait, and that memory of him trying to kill Naruto’s loved ones would have to endure, etching itself on Naruto’s soul as much as Gaara’s sand had worn him away. Hopefully, when they met again, Naruto would be willing to accept how he’d changed. If not… if not, he would simply have to earn back said trust, just as he would earn the trust and love of those in his village. If he could.
People could change. He would prove that.
There was a ruckus over by the front gates to the city. Gaara and Kankuro both stopped their descent to watch as several ninja moved to the gate as if to block it. Gaara frowned. His sand swirled beneath his feet with barely a thought. He waited, only to turn and nod toward his sand. Gaara hesitated for a long moment before stepping carefully onto it. Only then did Gaara lower them both to the gathering crowd, his sand louder than usual in his ears. “What’s going on?” he asked. Many had already turned to him, their faces blanching at the sight of his sand already out. They all took a step back. Kankuro, recovered from his trepidation, stepped easily off Gaara’s sand and stopped suddenly, as if frozen.
“Gaara!”
He stiffened. The sound of sand whipped up through his mind. It hadn’t been his physical sand that he had heard as he’d come down. He turned. Before him, standing in the entrance to Sunagakure as if he belonged there, arms crossed, was Uzumaki Naruto. An old man stood beside him, white hair falling nearly to his ankles. This older gentleman looked Gaara up and down, his lips pulled in a tight frown.
Kankuro shifted a bit closer to him. “Uh, did you tell your soulmate to come here?”
Minutely, Gaara shook his head. He stepped forward. He could feel the deep scowl on his face, the instinctive need to push back when someone got too close. The wind in his mind kicked up the sand of his soul, obvious now that he understood what he was hearing. Naruto was grinning from ear to ear despite the look on Gaara’s face. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to see you, stupid.” Gaara blinked, unused to being called stupid, and certainly unused to hearing the word spoken with a smile. Naruto put his hands behind his head. “You didn’t think I’d let you just run away, did you?”
Kankuro stepped in between them. Gaara felt a deep flash of annoyance as Kankuro blocked his gaze from those bright blue eyes. “If you think we’re gonna let you get revenge for–”
“We’ve already discussed things with your village,” one of the ninja interrupted. Kankuro glared at the man. Gaara was grateful; he didn’t know how to feel about the fact that his brother had moved, not to stop him, but to protect him. “Go home.”
Gaara stepped around Kankuro, ignoring his brother’s sound of protest. Naruto was busy glaring up at the ninja who had spoken. Gaara wasn’t pleased with his words, either. Yet he couldn’t find enough calm within him to speak. His mind whirled around itself. He hadn’t expected Naruto to chase after him. With Konoha is a state of upheaval after everything Sunagakure and Orochimaru had done, Naruto should have been busy putting the village back in order. Yet here he was. Gaara felt something like dread inside him. He wasn’t ready. He hadn’t changed. In the back of his mind, Shukaku roiled, still furious with being denied during their battle. Did Shukaku sense his previous quarry before him? Would he want to attack?
Would Naruto?
Naruto seemed unwilling to stand and listen any more; he stepped forward, toward Gaara. Two Suna nin moved to intercept him. Kankuro held out one hand, reaching back with his other for Karasu. Gaara stopped him with a wave of his hand, his sand grabbing Kankuro’s arms and stilling them. He pushed the two ninja out of the way and stood before his soulmate.
Naruto looked, if possible, even more beaten up than when he and Gaara had faced each other. Whatever he’d been doing in the past couple of weeks, it had involved more battles. He felt that same strange need to reach out, just as he had during their battle. His hand wanted to reach up and touch the edges of those wounds, to find how deep they went. He also wanted to find the person responsible and feed them to his mother.
He didn’t say anything, but it didn’t seem to faze his soulmate. As usual, this particular ninja needed no excuse to make noise. “The Third always said you’d have to be from Suna,” he said. It was almost as if he was continuing some conversation they’d had before, but Gaara couldn’t recall any that would make that non sequitur fit. Naruto, however, didn’t seem to have a problem with him not responding, instead continuing on to say, “you know, since it was sand.” Naruto tapped the side of his head and chuckled, closing his eyes and grinning even wider. “I’m really glad I found you!”
Gaara blinked. He could see no artifice. Was he serious? He looked happy. To see Gaara? He opened his mouth. Closed it.
“You are not welcome in Suna,” one of the ninja said. They blocked the gate, even though they were careful not to get in Gaara’s way. Gaara could sense the malice in them, however, and went stiff in response. He could see a few of them readying to attack.
“I get that you don’t have a kage at the moment,” the older man said, quickly grabbing Naruto’s shoulder when the blond made to open his mouth. “So if you don’t want us coming in, that’s fine. But I gotta tell you, this kid is insistent about this soulmate thing. And I don’t think it would hurt to have kindly relations between soulmates in our villages right now.”
The animosity didn’t desist, but there was hesitation that hadn’t existed before. The ninja turned to one another, sharing frowns for several moments before turning back to the duo. The one that had spoken before nodded. “We’ll speak with the council,” he said, teeth gritted horribly, fingers tight. Gaara knew very well that the only reason he’d agreed was because of the unspoken warning: that, while two soulmates from their villages getting together would look great, Suna refusing to allow Konoha’s half to meet their Suna other would look just as bad. “You will not be allowed past this point. Do you know the name of your mate?”
Without hesitation, the idiot pointed right at him. “It’s Gaara, duh! I’d known since I’d seen him. He even uses sand.”
The words made the ninja freeze; Kankuro sighed and slapped one hand over his face. Gaara felt little more than surprise; not only had Naruto thrown out his name as if it was an exciting fact rather than a horrifying one, he’d apparently known who Gaara was from the moment they’d first met on Konoha’s streets. While Gaara had been busy staring at Sasuke, Naruto had been looking at him. And Gaara had not given the best showing. He remembered trying to kill Naruto’s friend in the hospital and gritted his teeth.
He hadn’t changed. He hadn’t done anything. This was the wrong time for Naruto to be here.
He never would have thought the ninja would actually hunt him down.
The ninja – and Gaara supposed that, if he was going to change, he should probably start by learning their names – all seemed to reach for their kunai at the same time. Gaara glared at them.
So much for fostering goodwill.
Naruto was glaring at them too, he saw belatedly. He didn’t know whether to be happy they were in sync or upset that their combined attitudes were going to ruin…
Ruin this reunion.
He held his breath and stepped forward. None of the ninja around him dared oppose him. His brother made an aborted sound of concern, but stayed back. Naruto stopped huffing at the Suna nin and stared at him. Gaara waited. Amazingly, Naruto grinned. “That’s right! You can just come out here with us if you want! So there!” he said, and stuck his tongue out at the men.
It wasn’t actually what Gaara had planned – he had merely wished to see Naruto’s reaction at his nearness, to see if the man would try to attack him, or yell at him, or back carefully away. Considering Gaara’s efforts to kill him and those he cared for, the sudden shift in response…
But no. He remembered the tears that had mottled those baby blue irises as Naruto had struggled to crawl toward him in those last moments. Perhaps he’d been looking for anger because he’d have much preferred it to the hurt.
Slowly, Gaara stepped outside the gates of Sunagakure. Instantly Naruto was on him, clapping his shoulder and laughing. The blond flipped off the Suna nin. “See! Don’t need you! Shove off!”
Even through his new vestments, Gaara could feel the sandy wind sing across the back of his mind. Once more, he felt the yearning to get closer. It hummed between them, a vibrating cord pulled taut at their proximity. The fury he remembered feeling felt far away in this moment, seeing the blond turn back to him with a triumphant grin. This person carried a monster within him, too. The signs etched as deep birthmarks on either cheek, three long, straight lines branding him as different. His fingers tingled with the need to trace them. He scowled.
The older man lifted a disapproving brow at Naruto. “We’ll wait for your decision,” he said. “In the meantime, there’s no harm in these two hanging out, is there?”
Every single ninja seemed to want to disagree. It was Kankuro who spoke up, his gaze level on Gaara. Assessing. “It’s fine.” The spokesperson for the ninja turned on him, but Kankuro just snapped out, “enough, Jarpin. Unless you want to try to explain, right here and now, why you’re not allowing Gaara a visit from his soulmate?”
The man opened his mouth to retort. Gaara knew what the retort would be – a remark on how, if it was Gaara’s soulmate, then it was another abomination on this earth. The anger reached a clawing scream in the back of his mind. His sand hovered around him. The man’s mouth snapped closed, his gaze on the writhing mass. The look on Naruto’s face was one he couldn’t read; for a moment, he saw a darkness not unlike his own, almost vindictive as it searched out the stretch of distance between his sand and Jarpin. Then it was gone, and Naruto was squeezing his shoulder. “Don’t worry about him,” Naruto said. Gaara recognized the effort behind his dismissiveness when he turned his head away from the gate and the Suna now trying to hide therein. “He’s just jealous. I don’t think he’s found his yet.”
Jarpin actually sputtered.
Gaara tilted his head. That was right. As a monster himself, Naruto would recognize the looks on these peoples’ faces. He had gotten thin-lipped, but he’d dismissed it. How? Fury still frissoned under his skin. His sand still reacted to it, wrapping and seizing in semi-circles around his form, lines of sand floating and freezing in the air.
“Weren’t you going to deliver a message about our arrival?” the older man asked. Jarpin flinched. He looked around for a moment as if lost, then turned to the old man and nodded.
“And who are you?”
“I’m Jiraiya.” The old man pointed to himself, much in the same way that Naruto had done during the Chuunin exams. Unlike with Naruto, however, Jarpin seemed to recognize the name. His eyes went wide. “I’m escorting the kid. Feel free to inform your council about that.”
For some reason, something in the ninja around them changed. The aura altered into something a smidgen more respectful. Gaara sent another, longer look at the man. He, like Naruto, was more than he appeared.
Jarpin left, likely to report doom and gloom to the Council, who would be sick to their stomachs to learn that not only did Gaara have a soulmate, but that soulmate, possessed with a monster of their own, was here. He could guess how that would go. A banishment would be the best situation they could hope for. An attack would be more likely. Which meant Gaara only had so much time to speak with Naruto before he would be forced to leave – or forced to fight.
But when he opened his mouth, nothing came out.
Words meant nothing. His actions were what this boy before him would remember. How could anything he might say rival what he’d done? How could, after only a couple of weeks to his name, he manage to be anything other than what he’d been before? Even now, the anger in him rose at the thought of Suna’s leaders sending assassins out to kill Naruto – something he was certain would happen. They could barely contain the monster that was Gaara. How could they hope to stop a rampage between two monsters destined to be together?
The only solace he had was that, so far, no one in Sunagakure knew about Naruto’s beast. It may help the blond.
“You’ll be targeted,” he said finally, unable to spare a greeting beyond that. Unable to spare a thought beyond that.
Naruto, however, just shrugged that aside. “Eh, people have always had a problem with me. No big!”
Gaara wanted to strangle him. Just a little bit. “They’ll try to kill you.”
The old man perked up at that. Gaara was grateful the idiot had someone beside him who would at least acknowledge the danger present. He wondered if this man was one of the ones who had helped Naruto through. One of his bonds. The old man was worth watching.
Naruto, of course, looked as if he hadn’t even heard him. “I don’t care about that right now. I finally found you again!” As if it had been years. “And this time, I don’t have to worry about my friends. So I’m not fighting you.”
Gaara opened his mouth to remind Naruto he could always attack him, only to falter once again. When the blond had first arrived on the battlefield, all he’d been concerned with was getting his friends out of there safely. He hadn’t wished to fight. Gaara had needed to force him into the battle – by using the lives of his friends as a threat.
Now, Naruto was telling him that there would be no fighting between them. Would the man run, if Gaara chose to pursue? Would he stand his ground? But of course he would; Naruto had bested him once, and did not seem to fear him any longer. (Speaking of fear, how had Gaara seemed to Naruto, who had recognized them as soulmates from the start? No; he shouldn’t contemplate it.)
“I…” He eyed the people at the gate; they watched with narrowed gazes, studying the interaction between them. He felt his hackles raise all over again. When he turned back to Naruto, he lowered his voice until it was little more than a scratch against the air. The wind hissed around them; in his mind, it howled and screamed, begging for greater contact between them. Both tried to push them together. “I don’t want to fight.”
One might think he’d confessed his love. “Me, either.” Naruto’s grin pushed those whiskers nearly into alignment near his nose. Like arrows pointing at his face. You belong here. Gaara hissed in a breath at the thought; the sand and wind thrashed, so loud now it nearly drowned out the rumbling of Shukaku’s desires.
“What going on, here?”
As one, they all turned to a new jettison of wind; Temari swooped down from atop her fan, moving seamlessly from a crouch to a stand as she whipped her fan from beneath her own feet and tucked it against her back. She looked from the crowd of ninja out to Gaara. Her eyed popped comically wide. “Gaara?” Then, a moment later, as she spied who he was with, “Uzumaki Naruto?”
Naruto waved. Waved. “Hi!”
Gaara looked at Temari, trying to impart the very large amount of panic settling in along the line of his shoulders. He had no idea what to do with a soulmate. He’d spent the majority of his life thinking he didn’t have one. And after that, he’d thought that the best thing to do with a soulmate, if one did exist, was to murder them. What was he supposed to do now? Interact normally? What could he say? ‘Sorry I tried to kill your friends mere days ago’? ‘I swear I’ll be less of a murderous psychopath when next we meet’? Neither of those would go well, even if words could somehow smooth this transition.
Temari turned furrowed brows on the men around the gate. “What is going on?” she asked again, her voice marginally more trenchant than before.
“This boy,” one of the Suna nin spat, and Gaara snarled all over again, “seems to be Gaara’s soulmate.”
Temari took this in, waiting a few moments. “And? Why are they standing outside?”
One of the Suna nin cleared his throat, but none answered. It was Kankuro who finally spoke. “They’re not letting Konoha’s ninja into the city.”
Temari blinked. “What?” It was a tone Gaara hadn’t heard before. Kankuro, however, blanched. “If it weren’t for this boy, our unit would have done untold damage to Konohagakure. If we had, we may have destroyed any chance of this reconciliation we have going. And now you’re not allowing them into the village? Can you imagine how that’s going to look?”
The ninja didn’t seem to know what to be horrified about first – Temari giving them a dressing-down, the idea of Konoha getting angry and thinking Suna was reneging on its apology, or Naruto being able to somehow hold off Gaara’s squadron.
Gaara tried to think of some way to defuse this situation, only to have Temari bridge the gap between them all and hold out her hand to Naruto. Naruto stared at it. “Uzumaki Naruto. We didn’t meet under the best circumstances last time. I’m sorry for what we did. I hope we have the chance to start over.”
Naruto still just stared at the hand. It nearly got awkward before the boy just laughed and slapped her hand as if to start some secret handshake. “Wow, you’re way too formal! You guys were assholes before, yeah, but that was back then. Besides,” he said, waving away her words, even as everyone around stared at them with eyes about to pop out of their skulls, “if you hadn’t come to attack Konoha, I might never have found Gaara! So it worked out.”
How the hell did it work out?
Gaara didn’t understand, but Temari seemed to. She smiled widely at Naruto and gestured for him to enter. “The Council would be foolish to send you away, especially after what our village just did to yours. After everything that happened, your village was magnanimous to offer us such easy forgiveness.” She glared at the border patrol ninja as she escorted Naruto inside. “I’ll speak with the Council myself if I must.” She glared at Kankuro, too. The man gulped. “Why would you let these idiots strong-arm you? You should have let Naruto in immediately!” Kankuro gave a helpless shrug, and Temari rolled her eyes. She dismissed him and turned to Gaara. “Your place?”
Gaara nodded. He wasn’t entirely certain what had just happened. Like a whirlwind, Temari had blown away the tension in the air and resolved the issue, simply by putting her foot down. Gaara had been lost, unable to threaten the ninja without breaking his own decision to change, unable to think of another way to get people to do as he wanted. He stood for an instant, taking in this new information, and saw Kankuro taking deep breaths. The attitude Temari had shown was not one he’d ever been privy to before. Likely because standing up to him like that would have, just weeks ago, gotten her killed. He’d thought his sister rather touchy-feely. Perhaps she’d simply been doing all she could to defuse things. He could remember a number of times when she’d mollified him, turned his aggression around to something slightly more stable.
He owed her several apologies. And more.
He stalked back inside the city gates, the old man – Jiraiya – by his side. The ninja glared at him as he passed. Temari led Naruto forward; Gaara kept several paces back, ready to react if anything happened. He saw Temari strike up a conversation with the blond and fought against an irrational anger he couldn’t name. Temari leaned close to Naruto, likely trying to keep their conversation private. He wanted to push her away. The desert wind in his mind kicked up, angry at the increasing distance.
“Nice place,” Jiraiya said, his smile sardonic. Gaara watched him from the corner of his gaze. The old man looked around, studying the curved architecture, before turning to him with a suddenly serious expression. “What are the chances Naruto will be accepted here during his stay?”
“None,” he said, his voice short. The old man nodded. Gaara could see it in the old man’s eyes as he returned to looking around – he was memorizing the area. Preparing for the battle that would inevitably come.
“If they try to harm him,” Gaara said, his voice low, “they will regret it.”
The old man seemed surprised. He grinned down at Gaara. “I’ll admit, I was worried when the brat told me who his soulmate was. Your reputation precedes you… in some circles.”
Gaara could guess which ones.
“And then, of course, the fact that you nearly killed him.” Jiraiya held up a finger. Gaara didn’t flinch at the accusation, though the reminder of it left him tense. He thought again of Naruto’s despairing face as he’d crawled closer. He stared at the blond’s back, thinking of how far he would go for that elusive bond between people. He had even come here, chasing after Gaara. “Are you upset that he came?”
Gaara did flinch then. He glared murder at the old man, but he was busy looking around again, this time pretending guilelessness. Gaara hesitated. Huffed. “No.”
“Good.” He nearly jumped at the sudden seriousness in that voice. The old man’s face, however, remained seemingly innocent. “Naruto has a tendency to act first and think later. It’s likely you needed time to consider what happened in Konoha. Don’t let him steamroll you.”
Was… this man looking out for him? He tried to imagine what that would be like, to have a stranger worry over his feelings. He glared ahead, furious at the warm feeling inside him. It was likely that the man was thinking only of Naruto, of another rejection and what that would mean for his efforts to reach out to Gaara. He took a deep breath. That didn’t mean he couldn’t accept the kindness offered, he told himself. And if Naruto had someone looking over his efforts, then that could only be a good thing. Especially here.
He grimaced. “He is… something I did not expect to exist.”
The look Jiraiya gave him seemed to understand what he meant a bit too well.
Naruto turned to the two of them. “Hey! How long are you two gonna mope around? Get up here!”
Gaara nearly made to do as told. As he stepped forward, Jiraiya shouted, “don’t tell me what to do, brat! And we’re not moping!” Jiraiya held up a single finger. “We’re talking. Don’t interrupt!”
Naruto stuck out his tongue. His gaze flitted to Gaara, scanning for something, before he turned around and groaned. “Why is everything here so brown?!”
“Don’t insult another hidden village, brat!” The old man threw a kunai, deliberately hitting Naruto with the flat end – but not before Gaara nearly caught the thing with his sand, reacting on some instinct he didn’t even know he could have. Jiraiya blinked at him, only to laugh. “And I’d think you’d like brown, kid!”
“It’s boring!” Then, an instant later, he looked back, brows drawn. Gaara quickly let his sand drop. Jiraiya chuckled. “Why would I like it?”
“Oh? You don’t?” Jiraiya bent down to pick up his kunai as they continued moving through the city. “Guess I was wrong, then.”
Naruto just stared at the old man, face slowly morphing from confused to frustrated. “I don’t get you, pervy sage,” he said, and turned back around. The same kunai banged against the back of his head. “Ow! Stop that!”
“Don’t call me pervy sage!”
The one who didn’t understand, Gaara thought, was him. But for some reason, the spectacle before him made him smile.