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you ever think about how as writers and creators we put bits of all the people we've ever loved into our stories out of convenience and love and regret et cetera like this college dorm, my ex situationship who used to shut down for 2 weeks at a time at me specifically in between make out sessions lived in wharton which inspired it, or this character really likes soda because my girlfriend does too, or this place is one i went to with my mother when i was ten, or this dog is my friend's fat dog, to be loved by a writer is to live forever in their legend of zelda fanfic and i think that's beautiful. they shouldnt find out though it would be awkward
not every day is good but there is good in every day you stupid faggots!!!!!!!!
i fear i am becoming insane because i have 4 weeks to clean this dogshit apartment up so i get my deposit back, finish my degree, and leave the country but instead i am thinking about, Birthing more like, really, zelda and link and magical realism... maybe they live in an apartment together in some city (needs to decide city). how did they meet? how many elements of my childhood shall i introduce? at some point they have to go on a journey, even if just a small one... i fear it is happening. the Inevitable. the canon character study to au pipeline. maybe it is time to write something long again. it's been so many years since i told a whole story
ok friends i know i've been gone a good minute (considers that it has been too long to still be relevant) my dick is on fire (gets shy and goes back on topic) i am doing good rewriting the foundation of the zelink magical realism fic and i WILL finish it and it WILL see the light DO NOT BE AFRAID!!! (is afraid) IT WILL COME OUT!!!! (childbirth style) THE BEGINNING IS REWRITING... THE GROUND FIRMENS (new word that means to get firmer) THEY EMERGE.... MY CHILDREN......
had a couple of thoughts tonight like i should go on a date with a stranger before i leave this country and make it extremely funny and then more pertinently that i really miss fandom. particularly hanging out in one fandom and just making stuff and making friends and getting to you know. change lives and be changed. im afraid my loneliness in australia has reached its zenith. this is the end of solutitude but the end of solitude by nature has to be the most miserable leg of the journey. i think i miss love and community and holding someone's hand. the other night lying awake in bed before falling asleep i thought about what my old college was like deep in winter, of hearing laughter down the hallway until 2 am every night and seeing snow outside the window and waking up to a series of routines with people i loved. even writing about it now is a hurting activity. and the time won't come back and the world must move on but oh lord has this last year been a difficult one to live. i'm looking forward to going home and making art. i'm looking forward to making art tomorrow too. i think it's time to do the important worldly things like loving and knowing and learning. lets be brave togerher
people at work sometimes will refer to me with all 3 mainstream pronouns in the same conversation which is soooo funny but then i have to remember i look like this and its like nvm christina's doing her best
WAIT . you SHOULD KNOW!!! i am alived. just back in sh and finished my finals and NOW IN MALAYSIA for short trip but GOING BACK TOMORROW -and then the gf is LEAVING ME FOR JAPAN so thays right FIC TIME!!!! RAHHHHHHHH FIC TIME!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH it's not ver i haven't forgotten about her she lives in my brain LINKMLU AND ZELDAMOJ AND GANONMOU ARE ALWAYS WITH ME!!!! YOU WILL GEST TO SEE HER!!! BE NOT AFRIAD!!!! ok goodnight