#genderqueer joy

[our-queer-experience]

It took me so long to realize I didn't just have to be a "boy" or "girl". It's not either-or!! It was so confusing for me because I'm not just "nonbinary" either, because I thought that was all there was at the time! I'm a bit of all of those, plus some other random crap as well. I use the label Genderqueer Boygirl! It was a pain to figure out lmao

congrats on figuring it out!

[joshuadunshua]

In preparation of this pride month… I got top surgery! (Mar. 24!)

So far:

Sleep is a nightmare. I am not a back sleeper in any sense of the word.

I passed out night one trying to get to the bathroom and shoulder-checked the doorframe, banging up my right side pretty bad (hiii big ol hematomas and bruising). Boyfriend caught me on the way down, saving me from any serious damage, but I spent that night in the Emergency Department cause he was worried it was a small seizure when I apparently convulsed for a moment or two. (It was a vasovagal syncope).

Now my right side is seeping some stuff, probably hematoma stuff.

I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I love my chest. I keep remembering I never have to have breasts again and I get so so happy. My experience with my surgeon & my hospital was excellent. Even the ER visit was excellent. My surgeon has been phenomenal, my boyfriend is taking very good care of me, and I have had very minimal pain throughout this whole ordeal so far.

Happy Pride! 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

This genderqueer is finally experiencing some serious trans fucking joy. 🥰

Can’t wait to show it off!!!

[pipfinn4]

being queer scares me. not because i dislike being queer, or that my queerness is a problem to me, but because i am scared of the way other people perceive my queerness. i am scared that other people will use my identity against me, to actively attack me based around my identity, or to exclude me from their life because of my identity.

being open about being genderqueer in college also scares me. some people will accept me, and use my correct name and pronouns. even though only a few people know my birthname, it still scares me that they may tell people that my preferred name isn't my legal name. some people use my correct name but do not use the correct pronouns for me. i don't know if it is they choose to ignore my pronouns, if they simply haven't heard when i have corrected them, or if they just refuse to accept me. some people just don't want to call me by my correct pronouns, because they don't believe in my gender identity, even though my identity is nothing to believe in, it just simply exists.

me being genderqueer also scares me because of my position in society. i'm a white, AFAB genderqueer person, meaning that i am often seen as "just another white girl trying to join in with the trends" or that i am "just another confused teenager". i understand i have more privilege than other genderqueer people, and i do not take that for granted, but i also do not want people to say i am faking my identity for attention just because i fit their idea of who i should be.

everybody should be respected in their identity. nobody's identity should scare them. we should all be respectful of other people's identities.

[pipfinn4]

i purchased some new tshirts and hoodies/jumpers about a week ago and they arrived today. they were all from the mens section and they arrived today. ive just tried them on and i have never felt so comfortable in clothes before, not because of the material, but because i feel like they actually show who i am without feminising me and i feel like i have finally found clothes that make me feel like myself. this is what being genderqueer is to me- finding myself and how i can feel comfortable in my own body without feeling like i have to change myself for anyone else. this is my very own version of genderqueer joy, and nobody, NOBODY, can take this away from me, especially people who do not know me and have no say on my existence (and the government because fuck rishi sunak).