I think it would be really funny if Toritsuka and Chiyo, who both have problems with dating because they idolize the opposite sex instead of seeing them as fellow humans, were adult roommates after college because neither of them have enough money to live alone, and end up dating through the most ass backwards way possible.
the proposed sequence of events...
Inciting Incident 1:
One of them is watching porn loudly
> hey turn that down
> I pay rent I should get to do what I want
> but it's distracting and makes me want to watch porn too
> watch it at the same time then
Inciting Incident 2:
> hey turn down your porn I can barely hear my porn
> the volume is up because YOUR porn is too loud
> well it's distracting
> why don't we watch the same porn so the sound syncs up
> ok but then we have to choose porn together
> ok guess we'll have to see which of our favorites overlap
> check out this new thing
> nice
Inciting Incident 3:
> hey stop jerking it on the couch this is the living room!!
> I paid for half this TV why can't I use it to watch porn
> well then I want to use it too if we're watching the same porn anyways
> wait so we're both just going to jerk it here
> who cares it's just you
> ok true. carry on.
Inciting Incident 4:
> is it weird to give your roommate a hand while making out?
> nah who cares. wanna make out?
> yeah actually okay that's hot
Inciting Incident 5:
> man I feel like a college student just eating cup ramen and jerking it on the couch, and not in a good way
> what if we cooked a nice dinner together so we at least somewhat feel like adults
> great idea let's do it
Conclusion:
> wouldn't it be kinda hot if we dressed sexy before dinner & a show?
hsfjdlshfks @gioscott I think OP deleted your last reblog from the post (FAIR...), but thank you so much for the link!!
When I saw your post and tags, my kneejerk (and perhaps unfair) reaction to finding out that there is a Nensai doujin out there was to IMMEDIATELY assume that they made that poor little twink take that third leg.
Which made me think "how would I do Nensai porn without obliterating Saiki's butthole in the process?"
And so I wrote about 9k words of Nensai porn where they both have fun without risking lethal injury lmao.
Before posting it though, I wanted to check whether my assumption was right or not lol. And not only was I right, they also somehow added a wormhole portal to Saiki's throat so he could fit in a cock bigger than his head hsfjdlshfks
Really sweet premise and great art, but I think I was able to come up with less brutal ways for them to fuck each other silly lmao
I'll probably post that sometime this weekend, thanks for the inspo and I hope you like it!
Looking through my notes and found a Torisai psuedofic <-That's a word I made up to describe the long play-by-play summaries I usually write that then gets turned into the kind of "proper" fic that actually gets posted. It's very steam-of-consciousness and unpolished but has pretty much everything there.
This particular pseudofic is a lemon and will probably never get written "properly" since I decided to go with a frog boil for my Torisai intro fic instead. So I decided to post it here, unedited!
This is part of my post-canon AU, btw, where Saiki usually sleeps over with one of his friends or boyfriend/girlfriend each night. It helps Saiki feel safe and rest more easily since he can wear the germanium ring without being as anxious about ninjas and stuff. Also Saiki tends to unintentionally broadcast his thoughts and feelings at a very low level of telepathy. Most people can't tell, but the Psychickers can feel it and often figure out Saiki's mood from it.
Ok I think that's all the context 👍 Mild lemon under the cut...
Torisai Sleepover
Saiki ends up in Toritsuka's bed for a night when Aiura is out late dancing and Akechi is out camping with the lads (and Mera).
Toritsuka tries to pretend like he's not thrilled to get to sleep next to Saiki, and Saiki makes a little bit of a fuss but he sees how excited Toritsuka is about it and can't help but be a little fond. When they go bed, Saiki offers to spoon, but Toritsuka refuses, trying to pretend he's not fascinated by the thought. Saiki shrugs and settles in to sleep, dropping off pretty quickly, lulled by the silence of his germanium ring.
Toritsuka fidgets and the ghosts shake their heads at him for passing up the opportunity to cuddle. One of them points out that Saiki will automatically spoon anyone who gets close enough while he's sleeping like this (they get kicked out of Aiura and Akechi's room most of the time but they can enter the other rooms as they please), and Toritsuka is consumed by the thought of Saiki grabbing him and pulling him close.
He can't help but try it, slowly scootching back towards Saiki, facing away from him just in case for plausible deniability (as if Saiki can't just take off his ring and hear his guilt loud and clear). He bumps into Saiki's knee first with one of his legs and freezes with surprise, then Saiki moves his knee away and Toritsuka can't help but groan in disappointment. Then a warm hand settles on his side and gropes down his chest towards his other side, and Saiki gently drags him close, curling around him and nuzzling between Toritsuka's shoulder blades, clearly still asleep.
Toritsuka freezes as he's manhandled, then melts into Saiki's warm hold, the buzz of his touch starvation abating with the solid pressure of Saiki's body against his. He feels very very good, and safe, and cared for, and loved, and he's drunk on the feeling, shivering with pleasure and sighing when Saiki carefully squeezes him a little closer.
Then he wonders why he had been thinking "Careful. Careful. Careful." to himself, and realizes that he's been picking up Saiki's unintentional psychic broadcast. He remembers Aiura and Akechi talking about it, though he hadn't noticed it until today.
It does feel a little bit like Saiki's purr as a cat, and Toritsuka remembered all the little bits of physical affection Saiki had treated him to lately, and he starts to wonder if maybe Saiki likes him back a little too.
Toritsuka pets Saiki's arm affectionately and Saiki really purrs for him, always enjoying gentle touches. Toritsuka's heart catches in his throat and he can't help but snuggle back into Saiki's hold and caress his arm, and Saiki sighs and sleepily presses soothing strokes of his palm down Toritsuka's chest and tummy.
Or at least it seems like it's meant to be soothing, but Saiki's widespread fingers catch and rub against Toritsuka's stiff nipples each way and Toritsuka groans as Saiki's hand comes to a stop at his lower belly, just above his half-hard cock.
He can't help but notice the extra heat of Saiki's slack but toasty cock against his ass now, and Toritsuka can't help but daydream about Saiki fucking him doggy style, their bodies pressed close together just like this and Saiki commanding him to fuck his own fist even as he pounds Toritsuka's ass and fills him with hot cum.
Toritsuka shudders in pleasure at the thought, his cock rapidly stiffening, and he wants to jerk off so bad. Then he imagines Saiki's warm hand jerking him off instead, with Saiki's voice in his head telling him not to cum until he's told.
Now he's fully aroused, his cock hard and twitchy and needing to be touched, and Saiki is warm and holding him close and still broadcasting happy sleepy feelings that make Toritsuka feel shivery and loved.
With trembling hands, Toritsuka carefully reaches for his well-used bottle of lotion, cursing when it's just out of reach. He struggles against Saiki's hold a little, and after a bit, Saiki loosens his grip with a sleepy mental chant of "Gently. Gently."
Toritsuka is full of affection in that moment, limbs weak at the thought of how much his local god loved and cared for them, controlling his insane strength even while deeply asleep. He grabs the lube and snuggles back against Saiki's chest, and Saiki's arms both curl around him now with a happy sigh from Saiki against his back.
Toritsuka shivers and shudders with his own pleasure and Saiki's happy broadcast, wondering if he should really fuck himself like this, while Saiki was asleep and trusting him to take care of them.
Then he notices several of his ghosts leaving the room or looking away, except for the known perverts, and he realizes that if only the pervert ghosts agree with what he's doing, then it's almost certainly wrong and Saiki won't like it. He pictures Saiki recoiling in disgust and flinches, yeeting the lube away.
Saiki nuzzles sleepily at Toritsuka's shoulder, and Toritsuka shivers helplessly with pleasure, still overwhelmed by the strength of the broadcast and the warm grip on his body.
Still, he's determined to behave, and for the first time in his life, grips his prayer beads with real intention, trying to focus on the feel of the beads and the feel of Saiki's sweet affection and ignore the tenting of his pants. He eventually manages to fall asleep this way.
When Saiki wakes, he finds it unusual that he's both holding Toritsuka and that Toritsuka is holding his beads. Still, Toritsuka is quite nice to cuddle with, so he stays curled up close, ignoring his case of morning wood. Toritsuka wakes up slowly, half lulled by Saiki's warm broadcast and making soft begging noises. Saiki finds it kind of cute and kisses his shoulder, and Toritsuka shudders with pleasure. He wakes up all of a sudden then, melts back into Saiki's arms, then stiffens with fear as he remembers what he almost did last night.
Saiki frowns against Toritsuka's shoulder and Toritsuka immediately starts apologizing and begging for forgiveness, but he can't bring himself to pull away from Saiki's warm body.
Saiki sighs and pets Toritsuka kindly, slightly impressed that he actually used his monk training for something useful and that Toritsuka managed to resist jerking off even though he was drowning in the most pleasure he'd ever experienced.
Saiki tells Toritsuka that he didn't realize his psychic broadcast was that strong, but Toritsuka shakes his head, saying that the others didn't seem to feel it quite as strongly, so maybe he was just more sensitive.
Saiki remembers how Kusuke had managed to hypnotize him pretty thoroughly and ruffles Toritsuka's hair, telling him he was dumb and troublesome, but loyal when it counted. Toritsuka shudders at the praise and the affection, helplessly starting to get aroused again. He grabs his prayer beads nervously and Saiki takes pity on him.
Saiki cradles Toritsuka close and tells him he won't mind if Toritsuka touches himself now. He generally enjoys cuddling lovers through orgasm, and he's feeling fond enough that he wants to see Toritsuka glowing with bliss.
Toritsuka pinches himself, unable to believe it at first, but Saiki chuckles at him and starts kissing his neck and shoulder, enjoying Toritsuka's immediate moans of pleasure.
Toritsuka doesn't last very long after Saiki hands him his heated lube, shuddering apart in the strongest orgasm of his life. He lays almost completely limp afterwards, blissed out, and Saiki laughs affectionately at him and cleans him up.
Once he's clean, Saiki runs his fingers sweetly through Toritsuka's hair and Toritsuka visibly tries to stay awake to enjoy it, but he's exhausted and Saiki's broadcast is warm and comforting and he feels safe, so he drifts off to sleep. Saiki chuckles and sleeps in with him a while longer, spooning him affectionately again.
Sometimes it's fun to indulge in a little mischief, and Akechi finds it endlessly entertaining to put Kusuke in silly little scenarios. Can renowned university professor Dr. Kusuke Saiki deliver a basic physics lesson to a student who's being a little bit distracting?
Significantly less insane than my first Tousuke oneshot, just a fun little PWP <3
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Kubometo lemon concept: Kuboyasu insisting that he'd never cum for a machine because he's a man, and Saiko attempting to prove him wrong with his wildly expensive collection of sex toys
