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Gabija: Hello! Please, come in. It is cold outside.
Jude: Yeah, the weather's turned.
Gabija: I'm making spaghetti.
Jude: Oh, you cooked? I actually just wanted to talk really quickly. I don't have time for-
Gabija: No, come. You'll have a plate.
Jude: Um...
Gabija: This way. It smells good, yes?
...
Gabija: This is my housemate, Lizzie. She is from the UK, like you.
Jude: Okay, well, I'm not from you UK at all. I actually haven't been there either, so-
Lizzie: Alright?
Jude: Yeah. Hi. Look, Gabija, can we just-
Gabija: Do you want to taste the sauce?
Jude: No, not really.
Gabija: No, come. You can tell me if it has too much salt or too little.
Jude: [tastes it] Yeah, it tastes like tomato sauce.
Gabija: [laughs uproariously] You're so funny! I tell Lizzie all the time of how funny you are.
Lizzie: She really does. Funny, talented, handsome... among other things. You've really got the full package, haven't you?
Gabija: Come, sit. The paste is finished.
...
Gabija: Do you know Jude has his birthday on Saturday?
Lizzie: Yes! I heard this. Gabby mentioned it to me once or twice.
Jude: Did she.
Lizzie: Have you plans together?
Jude: No.
Gabija: He is going to a party with friends.
Lizzie: Aw! You didn't want to go, Gabs?
Jude: It's close friends only. She doesn't know the guy hosting.
Lizzie: Well, at least you can both go to B-
Gabija: Lizzie! Shh!
Jude: What's going on?
Gabija: I have bought you something. A gift.
Jude: Oh, God. No, you really... I don't want anything, Gabija, seriously.
Gabija: You talked about how you like Bon Iver...
Jude: Oh, no...
Gabija: And I read they are coming to Berlin in some weeks...
Jude: Jesus...
Gabija: So I got tickets! One for you, one for me!
Jude: Fuck sake, Gabija.
Lizzie: [chortles] Is that how you say you love something in Ireland?
Gabija: You don't want them.
Jude: You made me a card, too?
Gabija: Yes. I painted it.
Jude: Why?
Gabija: For your birthday. I wanted for you to smile.
Jude: But we aren't even together. This is just casual. Why would you do all of this?
Lizzie: Excuse me. I have to go off and... do something.
Gabija: Have I misunderstood?
Jude: I'm just not interested in getting serious to the point that we're like, going to events together, if I'm honest.
Gabija: Oh.
Jude: ...sorry.
Gabija: You don't like me.
Jude: Look, if you got the wrong idea... [breaks off] It's me, right? It's me. I'm not ready for anything serious. I'm not looking for a relationship, and like I said, it's me, not you. I'm the issue.
Gabija: I don't think it's the truth.
Jude: It is.
Gabija: No. There is something about me you do not like.
Jude: Why would you say that?
Gabija: Because you were not happy with me when we had coffee with your Irish friend.
Jude: Okay, well, in fairness, on that day, you weren't actually supposed to come. You invited yourself.
Gabija: You said I could come.
Jude: I heavily implied that you couldn't, actually.
Gabija: you implied?
Jude: Yes, I implied.
Gabija: And do you want me to read your thoughts? You did not say no.
Jude: Well, you're supposed to pick up the signals.
Gabija: The signals are, 'I will not tell you, but please do not come because then I will be very upset'? I don't know what to say. You are a confusing man.
Jude: I'm not.
Gabija: You say one thing but mean another, and say you are not confusing?
Jude: Sorry if I'm confusing, then. Should I go, then?
Gabija: I don't care. if you like, you can finish your spaghetti.
Jude: [incredulous whisper] Why would I want that?
Gabija: It will otherwise go to waste.
Jude: I think in this case it's okay to waste it.
Gabija: Leave it on the table. Maybe I will eat it tomorrow.
Jude: Whatever you want. Hey, we're not going to be awkward in college now, are we?
Gabija: I think yes.
Jude: Ah, well. Obviously you can keep the tickets.
Gabija: I do not know who Bon Iver are. I got them just for you.
Jude: That makes me a bit sad, to be honest.
Gabija: Take them with you.
Jude: Thanks.
Gabija: Bye, Jude.
Jude: Yeah, bye.
