Mistakes and Decisions (Part 1)
Title: Mistakes and Decisions
Chapter: 1
Fandom: Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda/ Love, Simon
Pairing: Leah Burke x fem!reader
Description: After a series of realizations, you break out of certain sticky situations in search of a new start… and definitely some new friends
Warnings: toxic friendships, cursing, Martin Addison (evil fucker is a warning on his own. Fuck you Martin Addison, go die Martin Addison), heartbreak, further evidence that Simon Spier deserves to be loved
A/N: As promised, my Love, Simon fic series. This is how we’re wrapping up 20gayteen folks. This is pretty much as much anti-M*rtin *ddison propaganda as it is a Leah fanfic (I’m angry and self-projecting, sorry). Also, this has some Suraj appreciation stuff because we know next to nothing about him but he seems like a chill dude who unfortunately got stuck being friends with M*rtin of all people. Anyway, I’m thinking of breaking this into five parts (one for each of the remaining months of the year), let me know what you think
You knew being friends with Martin Addison was a mistake.
Of course, it wasn’t all terrible; being friends with him almost guaranteed you a role in the school play, and you were introduced to Suraj, who was kind, funny, and actually a pretty good friend.
However, despite being friends since elementary school, the bad vastly outweighed the good. After years upon years of “friendship”, judgement became clouded, shadowing the fact that he was often manipulative and somewhat controlling, and just a douchebag in general. This unfortunately meant that it took you forever to realize these truths. When you did find out, it was because of the little things: his “brutally honest critiques” that became much more frequent, little comments and suggestions that seemed more about keeping you a certain way than being honest or helpful, the way he blatantly cast you aside with a hint of a holier-than-thou attitude whenever Abby Suso was around, and the sketchy way he acted around Simon Spier that made you all kinds of uncomfortable. However, there were some not-so-little things that helped you realize the truth too.
For example, Bram’s Halloween party...
You had lunch to yourself that day, since Suraj was working with Ms. Albright on instrumentals for the play, and While looking for a place to sit, you saw Simon, Abby, Bram Greenfeld, Leah Burke, Nick Eisner and Garrett Laughlin sitting at a table talking. They were all clearly very engaged in the conversation, and you were contemplating joining them, when you saw Garrett stand up.
“All right, hey, guys, Halloween party Friday night!” he hollered at passers-by, “Friday night, Halloween party, okay? Bram’s house!”
You giggled as you watched him point out a random freshman who you were pretty sure had never met Garrett before in his life, “Hey, little guy!”
“Me?”
“Halloween party. Friday night. Bram’s house. Be there.”
You laughed some more at the look on the freshman’s face, prompting Garrett to turn around when he heard you, “(Y/n)! Party at Bram’s house, Friday night, you in?”
“Sure, I’m in.” You chuckled, “If I can come sit with you guys.”
An instant chorus of “of course” and “hell yeah, come sit down” flooded your ears as Garrett led you to a seat across from Leah and Simon. The rest of lunch was fun, filled with joking and laughter, and plans for the coming party.
A couple days later, you got a call after school. You answered reluctantly, seeing as hardly anyone called you, but you weren’t sure why you were surprised when the first thing you heard was a butchered German accent on the other end of the line.
“Why hello there, Fraulien.”
You sighed immediately, pinching the bridge of your nose, “Hi, Martin.”
“What’s with the sigh?”
“Well, for starters, your German accent needs serious work.”
You heard Martin scoff, and then the faint sound of shuffling, like he was digging around for something, “My German accent is fantastic, grumpy pants, and that’s not why I’m calling.”
“Then why are you calling, exactly?”
“I have been invited to a party this Friday-”
“Bram’s Halloween party?”
There was a pause, and a noticeable change in Martin’s voice at his next sentence, “You already know about the party?”
“Yeah.” You said slowly, “Garrett invited me right after Bram told him about it. I was thinking about asking Suraj if he can drive me.”
There was another pause, and for a moment you thought the line had gone dead, “Martin? You still there?”
“I have to go. I’ll see you later.”
His voice was strained as he ended the call, as though he was talking through gritted teeth. You were confused but ignored it, choosing instead to focus on picking a costume.
When the day arrived, Suraj picked you up at 8:30, decked out in a clearly home-made Waldo outfit.
“Nice costume.” He commented, gesturing to the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent outfit you’d thrown together.
“Thanks! And thanks again for driving me.”
“Of course. What are besties for?” Smiling, Suraj pulled out of your driveway and headed for Bram’s house.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to pay you? Not even for gas money?”
“(Y/N), the only reason I’d ever let you pay me is if you’re going to pay me in memes.”
You shook your head at that, laughing, “Of course. How ridiculous of me.”
You spoke the last part in a German accent when you turned to see an unholy amount of props for the play in the back seat.
“Yeah, please don’t tell Ms. Albright I left those back there.” Your friend laughed, “Your accent is great though! Way better than Martin’s if I’m being honest.”
“Yeah, his needs work. What he doesn’t need is to know that I got that good from watching and re-watching the X-Men animated series over and over and over again until my accent was on par with Nightcrawler’s.”
“Nice!”
The two of you continued to laugh and joke until you made it to Bram’s street, parking a few houses away since you were certain there’d be no space any closer to the house. When you walked in, Garrett was wrapping up a karaoke performance of Megan Trainor’s No- jumping around to the beat in his Michael Phelps costume- and Simon was waving you into the kitchen with him. You bid farewell to Suraj and ran over to compliment Simon on his John Lennon outfit.
“Thank you, agent.” he smiled, “Bram was just about to pour us some drinks, do you want anything?”
“Not right now, thanks, I’m okay.” you turned to Bram, “Nice costume though! Tourist?”
“Um, excuse you, I’m post-presidency Barak Obama.” Bram corrected you, chuckling,
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Obama. I mean nothing but respect for my president.”
The boys laughed as you turned to Nick, “You didn’t dress up?”
Nick shook his head, turning around to show you the nametag taped across his shoulder blades, “I’m Cristiano Ronaldo, man.”
You cringed slightly, “Loving the effort you put in, Nick.”
“Shut up.” He grumbled, chuckling as Bram nudged him and handed the boys their drinks.
A large portion of the party went by in a blur. You spent some time chatting with the boys in the kitchen, then went to the backyard to find Leah and Abby (dressed as Yoko Ono and Wonder Woman, respectively) and dance with them for a while. Abby mostly just swayed, hiding from Martin who came up behind her, but Leah joked around with you as best she could.
“I can’t dance for the life of me, I’m warning you now.” She laughed.
“Come on.” You giggled, “I’m sure you’re fantastic.”
You gently took her hand, twirling her around and relishing in the small smile that etched across her face. You’d always liked Leah; she was kind and polite and undoubtedly pretty. She looked even prettier twirling, hand in hand with you, in the neon lights of the party and the glow of the illuminated swimming pool behind her-
Your moment was cut short as Abby was dragged away to play Beirut, and your stomach growling sent you inside for snacks. As you turned into the kitchen, you found Garrett there, poking his head into the fridge.
“Hey Garrett!” you greeted him cheerfully, but the second he heard your voice, he bolted.
“Garrett?” you called after him, confused as to why he was blatantly ignoring you, “Garrett! Stop!”
You grabbed his wrist, forcing him to turn and look at you, “What is going on? Why did you just run from me?”
He took a shaky breath, looking very reluctant to tell you anything, “Look, I’m sorry, (Y/N), I didn’t want to, but I had to.”
“You had to?”
“Look, Martin- he told me off. Yelled at me about inviting you here and gave some speech about how you’re off-limits to, like, everyone. I’m pretty sure he threatened me, and that’s not a big deal because there’s no way in hell I’m afraid of Martin, but I listened because I didn’t want anything to happen to you. You’re really nice and you’re super chill and we all love hanging out with you; I’d hate myself if something happened because of me-”
You saw Nick standing a little ways behind Garrett, looking between the two of you and nodding, as though confirming that Martin had told him the same thing.
“Wait, wait, wait.” You cut off Garrett’s rambling, practically seething with rage, “Martin did what?”
Garrett gulped, but before he could say anything, the devil himself turned the corner.
“Hey guys!” Martin greeted casually, throwing his arm across your shoulders and shooting daggers at Garrett in a not-so-subtle manner, “Garrett, what are you doin’, buddy?”
“Martin.” You began calmly, gripping his arm and quite literally throwing it back at him in anger and disgust, “Did you threaten Garrett to keep him away from me?”
The boy glared between you and Michael Phelps repeatedly, before feigning innocence with a scoff, “What? No, that’s ridiculous. Why would I do that?”
“Oh.” you turned to face him, “So you didn’t tell him off for inviting me to this party? And you didn’t tell everyone that I’m off limits?”
You saw his face change, but he slipped back into an innocent smile quickly, “No, no, of course not.”
Garrett looked between you and Martin with an expression that mixed both fear and curiosity, as you shook your head angrily.
“You lying son of a bitch!” You lunged at Martin, straining as Nick and Garrett held you back. Your anger grew as Martin’s face turned guilty and he ran for his life. You broke free from the boys’ grasp and chased after him, more than ready to give him a piece of your mind, when you saw him run into Simon. The poor kid looked annoyed too, but it got worse when Martin threw up all over him.
“Really?” You heard him cry, gesturing angrily to his shirt, “Really?”
Martin ran off again, and you went to follow him when a gentle hand held you back by your shoulder. You looked up to see Suraj gazing down at you, an almost regretful expression on his face, “Leave it. I’ll take him home.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” He nodded, “You just take care of yourself, okay?”
“Thank you, Suraj.” You hugged him one last time before he slipped out into the crowd. As he left, you turned your attention as far away from Martin as you could.
“Simon!” you called, racing up to him, “I’m so sorry, are you okay?”
He went to answer you, but froze momentarily, “Why are you sorry?”
“What?”
“Why are you sorry? (Y/N), you did nothing wrong.”
“Yeah, but Martin just threw up all over you and-”
“So?” Simon asked, a small look of concern evident in his eyes, “That was Martin, not you. (Y/N)…. how long have you been apologizing for Martin? I don’t think I’ve noticed before, but every time Martin screws up, you’re always right behind him with an apology. (Y/N), I’m sure you mean well, but how long can you keep doing that before it messes you up inside? How long before you realize that no matter how badly it messes you up, Martin probably isn’t going to apologize for that?”
You sighed, realizing that he had a very good point, but you still didn’t say anything. Simon opened his mouth to say something else, but a small voice behind you cut him off.
“(Y/N)?”
You turned to see Leah behind you, holding her hat in her hands. She fidgeted with the brim a little before speaking up again, “I heard what happened, with Martin and Garrett.”
Your face fell at that. You hated that this drama had flared up and that it happened at such a public place. Leah sighed and cleared her throat.
“Look, after the party, I’m going to sleepover at Simon’s.” She paused, looking over your head at Simon for consent before continuing, “Do you wanna come with us, (Y/N)?”
You sniffled, picking your head back up and smiling at her weakly, “I’d love to.”
After getting Simon a change of clothes from Bram (on old t-shirt and his mom’s white cardigan), the three of you marched back to Simon’s. Spier, being very drunk, was draped between you and Leah, stumbling and slurring and making you both laugh at his antics. He even started murmuring songs from the play, trying to do the choreography as he walked and almost knocking you and Leah over in the process. As you got closer, Simon suddenly yelled.
“Oh my god!”
“What? What?”
“My parents are still up.” He cried, running a stressed hand through his hair.
“Okay, okay, um.” Leah racked her brain for a quick solution, while you focused on keeping Simon upright, “Okay, you know what? Here, come on. I need you to think of something really sad like the documentary about how all the whales hate living at SeaWorld.”
“Too sad!” You and Simon protested in unison.
“God, okay.” Leah chuckled, exasperated, “Then just don’t say anything at all, and we’ll ditch the barf shirt until tomorrow.”
“Okay.” Simon nodded and you watched as Leah chucked the bag with Simon’s trashed clothes straight over the roof of his car.
When Simon started to topple over, both you and Leah grabbed him, “Si?”
“Yeah.”
“Just, as little as possible.” Leah reiterated, “Say as little as possible.”
You tried to all sneak in, but Mrs. Spier called out before you all made it upstairs, “Hey, guys!”
Leah cringed before leaning into the den, “Hey!”
“Come talk to us! How was the party?”
“Oh, it was really fun! Yeah!”
“Aces!” Simon added, trying really hard to not look as drunk as he was, “Hey, uh, you guys remember (Y/N), right?”
You waved to them both and watched as Mr. Spier squinted at you, clearly trying to remember you. Mrs. Spier recognized you instantly.
“Oh, yeah, (Y/N)! I remember you from the fifth grade science field trip! You told me I was pretty.”
You giggled, “You remember that?”
“Of course! Are you sleeping over too?”
“Oh yeah, my ride backed out on me last minute and your house is a much closer walk than mine, so Simon invited me. I hope that’s okay.”
“Oh, no, of course, sweetie! Of course, you’re always welcome here.”
“Are you saying that because she’s Simon’s friend or are you saying that because she called you pretty?” Mr. Spier joked, resulting in a playful slap to the shoulder from his wife.
Leah chuckled awkwardly, grabbing Simon, “Well, thanks for letting us stay over!”
“Oh, Leah, of course!” Mrs. Spier cried, oblivious to Leah shoving you and Simon up the stairs as discreetly as possible, “You’ve been staying over for 10 years, you don’t have to thank us.”
“Oh.” Leah laughed, inching her way towards the stairs, “Yeah, thanks.”
You all made your way up the stairs, very cautious of Simon’s stumbling and the fact that his sister was still asleep. After Simon sobered up a little, you all got comfortable in his room, figuring out sleeping arrangements and such. Simon was on his bed, Leah was on a bonus pull-out mattress, and you were on a blow-up camping mattress on the floor.
“Do you ever feel weird?” Leah asked suddenly.
Her and Simon launched into a conversation as you zoned out. The night’s events played out in your head, and the more they played, the more they made you sick. It seemed like the only good thing that came out of tonight was this, Simon and Leah, taking care of you as only Leah and (drunk) Simon can- with kind words and a soft distraction.
“Hey.” Leah spoke gently, placing her hand over yours and drawing you back to reality, “You okay?”
“Yeah.” You reassured her, shaking your head, “Yeah, it’s just this whole Martin thing has been exhausting. I think I’m gonna go to sleep.”
They both looked at you sadly, nodding in understanding and watching you slip further under the blankets- not once letting go of Leah’s hand.
“Goodnight guys.” You offered them a small smile.
Simon returned it, “Goodnight, (Y/N).”
“Goodnight.” Leah whispered as she squeezed your hand before letting it go.
You smiled again, brighter this time, and fell asleep gazing in the direction of the two kind souls ahead of you. No matter what the future held for you in terms of friends, you knew these two seemed like a pretty good start.
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