#greye talks

[grey-sides]

Between the harringrove awards and the zine- I have to ask why people are in fandom.

I mean, yes, I had hoped I would be nominated for something or that someone would send a treat via the café, but also- that's not why I write or interact with people. This is about making friends, even temporarily, and sharing my unique perspective on the subject!

It's not about getting recognition, really, or being the most popular. If that's why you're doing this- just start a TikTok account or YouTube channel or something. Stop pressuring yourself and the fandom to, like, get something more out of this. It's okay, it's not about clout.

[grey-sides]

Gang, I'm gonna be real. I'm like halfway worried if I decided to write a steddie story I would get hate since I stopped writing harringrove. And it's not because I don't believe in harringrove or Billy anymore and ugh!!! I'm tired of being afraid of being in fandom!!!!

[grey-sides]

The thing about Billy is, yes, he's angry, but I don't think he wants to be angry. I think it's the easiest emotion to access but it's also not helpful nor as releasing as he wants it to be. Hence, his tears in like every scene he's in.

He clings to anger because it's what he knows which is a major side effect of emotional neglect! But if you can't see how people would hold onto rage like their lives depend on it, then I don't know what to tell you.

[grey-sides]

Never gonna top this tbh

[grey-sides]

Hey I don't know who needs to hear this, but you don't have to enter the confession booth before interacting with art and media that brings you joy.

We're not Catholic here, but you can still pay me if you want.

[grey-sides]

I'm not deleting my post and I'm not arguing with anyone about it. I'm done. If you were hoping I would write more harringrove, I'm sorry. I can't do it anymore, not in a fanfiction format.

People are so ready to be angry at each other. I'm not saying that this is unique to this fandom, it's not, but I don't want to see it anymore.

I don't know where to go from here. I don't know how to interact in a fandom without feeling like I'm walking a line of getting canceled.

I wish we could be nicer to each other. I wish people would be able to read each other's posts with good intentions. I've never intended to be nasty, to point fingers, to create divides.

So. My final work will be in the harringrove zine. When I'm allowed, I will post it on my AO3. I will still be here, I'll still write fic, but I am tired and I am worn out. Maybe our future fandoms will align.

We treat each other like the antis treat us. Bad intentions, worse interactions.

[grey-sides]

Billy: Alright, well, I gotta go buy some cigarettes. I'll be back.

Dustin, *patting Steve's hand*: I'm so sorry, Steve, buddy, that's what my dad said before he left.

Steve:

[grey-sides]

Sorry for the delay, we are equal opportunity on this blog ❤