Welcome to Grimwood, Artemis! Please send your account in within 48 hours and take a peek at our checklist. We look forward to writing with you!
[ Joe Alwyn, cis man, he/him ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ ANDREW ‘DREW’ PRESCOTT ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 2 ] days?. Let the record show you’re [ 34 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ FREELANCE (WRITING AGENT) ]. It’s been told you’re [ CHARMING and MYSTERIOUS ] but rumor has it you can also be [ FROSTY and WHOREISH ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ CHEESY HALLMARK CHRISTMAS MOVIES and LIPSTICK STAINS ON COLLARS] or when they hear [ I Think I Like You by The Band CAMINO ].
[ Chandler Kinney, cis woman, she/her ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ HEATHER SOLAR ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 12 ] years?. Let the record show you’re [ 25 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ SOMETHING WICKED METAPHYSICAL SHOP (TAROT CARD READER) ]. It’s been told you’re [ OTHERWORLDLY and EXPERIMENTAL ] but rumor has it you can also be [ DITZY and FRIVOLOUS ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ COLORFUL SCARVES DRAPED OVER LAMPS and ALWAYS BURNING INCENSE ] or when they hear [ I Bet On Losing Dogs by Mitski ].
[ Owen Painter, nonbinary, he/they ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ JEDIDIAH ‘JET’ THOMPSON ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 8 ] years?. Let the record show you’re [ 27 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ REDACTED ]. It’s been told you’re [ DARING and PURSUASIVE ] but rumor has it you can also be [ NEEDY and UNTHINKING ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ REVVING YOUR ENGINE AT A STOP LIGHT and STILL HAVING TO SNEAK BEERS BECAUSE YOUR SIBLINGS SEE YOU AS A CHILD ] or when they hear [ Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus ].
[ Elle Fanning, cis woman, she/her ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ JINX JENNINGS ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 27 ] years?. Let the record show you’re [ 27 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ BLACK INK REVENGE (PIERCER) ]. It’s been told you’re [ FLIRTY and HONEST ] but rumor has it you can also be [ CRITICAL and EXPLOSIVE ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ BEING THE MOST FUCKABLE PERSON AT THE GROCERY STORE and AGGRESSIVE DAILY AFFIRMATIONS ] or when they hear [ Experiment On Me by Halsey ].
[ Kyle Gallner, cis man, he/him ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ JULIAN ‘JULES’ THOMPSON ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 8 ] years?. Let the record show you’re [ 35 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ REDACTED ]. It’s been told you’re [ PROTECTIVE and METICULIOUS ] but rumor has it you can also be [ ARGUMENTATIVE and CRUDE ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ SKULKING AROUND A DARK ALLWEY WAY and DOING WHAT YOU CAN TO KEEP YOUR FAMILY TOGETHER ] or when they hear [ Bad Blood by Silence The City ]
[ Austin Butler, cis man, he/him ] — Seems like you’ve made your way to Grimwood, [ VALO PEDERSON ] - welcome home You’ve been here for [ 4 ] years?. Let the record show you’re [ 34 ] years old, and are currently employed at [ GET UP AND GLOW DAY SPA (MASSAGE THERAPIST) ]. It’s been told you’re [ OPEN-MINDED and WELCOMING ] but rumor has it you can also be [ PLEADING and UNSENTIMENTAL ]. Don’t be surprised if people think of you when they think of [ A JOINT TUCKED BEHIND YOUR EAR and SAYING MORE WITH YOUR HANDS THAN YOUR WORDS ] or when they hear [ Skeleton by The Front Bottoms ].