#gwcountdown

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 5: 7 Laughingly Awful Guild Wars Armors

4. Vabbian

Vabbian Armor is one of the most expensive armors in game, made even more costly by the fact you get whole entire point for owning it in your Hall of Monuments. Crafted in The Kodash Bazaar in Vabbi, Vabbian armor takes an average of 15 rubies and 15 sapphires (plus other materials and gold) to create.

Seeing as it takes so many gems to make a set of armor, I thought Vabbian armor would look like this:

Instead, it looks like this:

Are you kidding me?

15 rubies and 15 sapphires and I look like a heap of basic bitch leather?

I am not a fan of Vabbian armor at all. There's only a couple that look decent and unique- the rest look incredibly boring and dull. There is no sign of sparkle or riches. Coming from the richest area in Nightfall, I definitely expected more out of Vabbian armor. I would expect worn brown leathers from Kourna...but from Vabbi, I imagined there would be more vibrant colors and blingee'd accessories. I feel like Mateneh is a con-artist who takes our gems, makes us some flop armor with cheap materials, and then spends the gems in a drunken haze later that night at the Vabbian strip club and casino*

*(A-Net plz add in the Vabbian strip club and casino!!!)

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 5: 7 Laughingly Awful Guild Wars Armors

7. Ranger Female Elite Druid

I'll just say up front that this armor is pretty cute. I dig it when it's dyed pink for some reason. I see little cute Rangers running around in pink Druid armor and I get a little jealous that I can't stuff my fat Ritualist boobs or Mesmer hips in that outfit

What makes this armor laughingly awful, however, is it's practicality. You have all these sharp ass sticks jutting out from your body. There is no way you could fight in battle without these sticks slicing up your body. A ranger wearing IRL Druid Armor would look like this:

What bothers me the most about this armor is the belt. How in the world is a belt of branches supposed to not only stay on your body but also hold up your crotchal cloth? Wouldn't the twigs snap in half any time you get knocked down or sit or do your ranger booty roll dance? Would they not chafe the fuck out of your stomach and lower back? How could you run or climb mountains with a chaged middle section? (I know I couldn't) (I'm not gonna say how I know this lol)

Also, all that leaf and wood would make you incredibly flammable. Those sticks look mighty crispy. One hit of Flare and your teammates could be roasting marshmallows instantly.

Don't get me wrong, I realize that not all armor is going to be 100% practical. But I will still LOL when I see a belt of twigs run by my screen.

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown: Week 4 Recap!

Week 4 was all about the best songs in Guild Wars. If you missed any posts, here they are linked for your pleasure!

7. Sands of Kryta

6. Ascension

5. Gwen's Themes

4. Kournan Caravan

3. Over The Shiverpeaks

2. Festival of Lyss

1. Crystal Oasis

Coming up this week: 7 Laughingly Awful Guild Wars Armors!

Do not be offended if the armor you wear pops up on this list: I love lulzy looking armor and outfit my character in many of them. I was going to do a 'best/prettiest looking armor' countdown, but really there are too many great armors out there and they would all end up being Mesmer armors since it is known that Mesmers have the best armor of all time. So instead, I will focus on the funny! First post will be up later today!

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 4: 7 Amazing Songs

1. Crystal Oasis

Crystal Oasis is my favorite song in Prophecies as well as being my favorite song to ever come out of Guild Wars. And there are plenty of great songs to choose from! It pained me to only feature 7 in my countdown, and it further pained me to organize songs 2-7 since the number one song was always clear to me.

Crystal Oasis plays in the Crystal Desert (derp) and it's such a majestic, uplifting song. This song personifies the act of Ascension more than the song Ascension does. Everything about this song screams reaching for something higher in life and achieving the impossible. I love chilling in the Crystal Desert outposts just so I can stare out at the sand and hear this song come on. When it does, I am like this: 

Here's a Citri tip: make a copy of this song on a CD and put it in your car and play it while you are running errands. It makes the most mundane thing seem like an epic journey. Like...

...driving through McDonald's to get a frozen lemonade

...ascending through the car wash tunnel

Or put it on your MP3 player of choice so you can listen to Crystal Oasis while doing dishes:

Or you can listen to it while you are Ascending in-game:

It's an astonishing song for such an astonishing moment in the Prophecies storyline

This song better be played somewhere special in Guild Wars 2 or else I will riot

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 4: 7 Amazing Songs

4. Kournan Caravan

On first listen, Kournan Caravan may not sound so special or exciting. However, once you spend a bit of time in Kourna and read the description of the area, the song takes on a new meaning.

The province of Kourna is eternally ready for war. For centuries, Kourna has had a military government, and its leaders have been direct descendents of Warmarshal Turai Ossa. Inspired by his example, Kournans revere loyalty, patriotism, a strong sense of duty, and dedication to military service. Not every Kournan is a soldier, but farmers laboring in the fields and crafters slaving in workshops know the value of a safe and secure province. The strength of the state depends on loyalty to its leaders. Pacified Centaur laborers add to the province’s muscle. Typical Kournan dedication drives citizens to work hard for prosperity—in fact, the entire nation relies on the province’s agriculture and handiwork. Kournan adventurers go to war secure in the knowledge that their swords are well-tempered and their armor well-made, forged as surely as the soldiers who wield them.

In short, Kourna is a very disciplined place whose military seems to be a backbone of the area. In Kournan Caravan, the backbone of the song is a driving drum beat. One can easily imagine soldiers marching to the next garrison, golden dust stirring beneath their footsteps. This is very much a war march- less frantic than Invasion of Vabbi (which is a great song btw). Kournan Caravan is more of a slow burn under the hot, Kournan sun. You get a strong sense of the military way of living, but also a dose of sacrifice and determination from everyone else who lives there. It's a haunting tune that sets the stage for all of your Kournan adventures, which is mostly killing every single Kournan military person you come across

lol is this Taskmasker wearing Uggs???? wtf ya'll

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 4: 7 Amazing Songs

5. Gwen's Themes

I actually had a different song planned for number 5 on my list, but after needing to re-install Guild Wars and being stuck on the loading screen for ages, I got to listen to Gwen's Theme about 3 times and decided to feature it instead. (Sorry, Kaineng Center theme!)

Gwen actually has 2 themes in-game. The first is the iconic piece that plays in Pre-Searing. I don't know how anyone could listen to this song and not think of the flowery hills, the blue sky, the cascading waterfall. Presearing is such a beautiful place and this theme fits perfectly. It's such a calm tune, just as Ascalon is such a calm place. There is no hint of the horrible things to come, no hint of chaos in the music. Just warm, soothing tones with a child-like flute medley mixed in: that flute presumably representing Gwen. 

The Searing happens and years later we see that Gwen is alive and well...and here we hear her new theme. The flute in this is more pointed and sharp, just as Gwen herself has grown into a sharper person. Gone is any sense of soothing: her theme, just like Ascalon's, is forever changed. Having music to reflect this just adds that extra layer of awesomeness to the game.

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 4: 7 Amazing Songs

6. Ascension

What I really love about this song is that it plays in two very different and contrasting areas: the Crystal Desert and the Shiverpeaks. Not too many songs would be fitting in different environments. You wouldn't hear the Norn horns in Vabbi or the soothing Ritualist's Theme in Old Ascalon. The fact that Ascension fits perfectly in two different settings is just something I really enjoy. 

The first part of the song always reminds me of a setting sun. It makes me think of the night hours coming, of walking by a fire in the Tomb of Primeval Kings. It makes me think of the Forgotten slithering about across the pale sand. The song conveys a sort of sad yet majestic tone which are two words that can describe the Crystal Desert. It's a place where many came to find better things and instead found death and despair. It's a place where you can see nothing but sand for miles...so how would this music also fit into the Shiverpeaks? 

The second half of this song always takes me back to the Shiverpeaks, Deldrimor Bowl in particular. I see the bark on the empty trees and white snow everywhere. I see Alesia dying 32498 times. I see Ascalonian Refugees scattered about trying to walk to a better life, in a sense going through their own ascension. While there may be no Bleached Bones about, you can still get a sense of sadness and desperation in the Shiverpeaks. I think using the Ascension song in these two places was a good call. When you get to the desert, you can be reminded of your time in the Northern Shiverpeaks and how cold and alone you felt up there. And as you walk around the sands at night, you once again feel cold and alone in the desert. It's really a great song that adds a lot to the environment. 

[citriplays]

Guild Wars Countdown, Week 4: 7 Amazing Songs

7. Sands of Kryta

My Guild Wars Countdown is back this week, this time featuring 7 of my favorite songs in Guild Wars. I wish you could see all the notes on my desk right now and rough drafts of pieces I've written on various songs that didn't make the cut. I'm having a nerd crisis because there are honestly too many amazing songs in the Guild Wars soundtracks that picking 7 to feature is very difficult for me. Jeremy Soule is such an amazing composer and I think everyone can agree that the soundtrack to Guild Wars is fantastic.

For song 7 however, I've decided to talk about Sands of Kryta. I remember hearing this song for the first time when arriving in Kryta and it fit perfectly with the golden sands and crashing waves under a clear blue sky, which was such a welcome sight after trekking through Browny McBrown Brown Ascalon and the stark Shiverpeaks

I wrote a bunch of stuff about my feelings about what this song represents to our characters but then read this YouTube comment that summed it up far more elegantly

Perfect :')