“Nothing is written in the stars. Not these stars, nor any others. No one controls your destiny.” - Gregory Maguire
BAD HABITS
Gwen plays with her hair a lot. It’s her safety blanket since the incident with her mother.
Gwen also tends to lick her lips in situations where she’s feeling particularly flirty.
BOTTLED UP
No one really knows about Gwen’s horrific childhood. The only people who really know the truth are Micah and her brother, but she doesn’t talk about it with either of them.
Gwen doesn’t remember much about her childhood with her mother. Doesn’t remember all the details of her old home, but there are certain things that can trigger her memory. Like the rich smell of alcohol on a woman’s breath, the sound of shattered glass, there are certain things that bring her back to the apartment building that she used lived in. It’s even worse when she walks by it. All of a sudden, she’s taken back into the room, closed off from society, trying to keep herself afloat when her mother is letting her drown.
She was four years old when the worst of it happened. Gwen was just a little kid, but that didn’t stop Kendra from losing control around the tiny brunette. Her hair was long, reaching the middle of her back since her mother wouldn’t take her to the hairdresser’s and it had begun to tangle up into knots. So Guinevere decided to take it upon herself to make a change. She pulled out the scissors from her drawer of craft supplies that her mother kept tidy. It was the only thing in the house that was kept organized, and although Gwen wasn’t sure why it was, she didn’t complain very much, she wasn’t sure how to when her mother was more often than not too drunk to remember what she said the night before. She walked into the washroom, noting her mother was passed out on the couch in the living room (a telltale sign that she had too much to drink), before climbing up onto the counter. Slowly, carefully, she took the safety scissors to her long hair, letting herself cut off the pieces that were too long, chopping off nearly 5 inches of her hair as she let it fall to the sink. It was messy, uneven, but all of a sudden, Gwen felt lighter. Felt like finally her hair wasn’t a mess anymore. Less to control and content to boot, Gwen walked out of the bathroom, her petite little 3’3 frame striding down the hallway, boasting with confidence at her new, messy, shoulder length head of hair.
Gwen hadn’t expected her mother to stir so soon, but slowly, groggily, the little girl watched her mother slowly wake up, eyes still half closed before she saw the little girl, and all of a sudden, her eyes opened wide.
“Guinevere?” she bit. Immediately, Gwen could tell that her mother was getting angry. “What have you done?”
“I cut my hair,” she mumbled, half under her breath.
“You did WHAT?”
“I cut my hair,” Gwen repeated one more time, looking up at her mother through the curtain of hair that covered her eyes.
“Why would you do something like that? Didn’t you realize how beautiful you were with your long hair? You were gorgeous, now… now you’re just an average little girl… an average little girl with an average little attitude and that’s not good enough Gwen. That’s not good enough for me!” her mother shouted, clearly intoxicated. Gwen could feel her upper lip quivering as she listened to her mother’s hateful words.
“It’s not a big deal,” she muttered, trying to keep her resolve, running her small little hand through her head of hair. She felt the difference in length as her hand reached the uneven ends, and she felt her eyes begin to well up with tears. “I’m sorry, mommy… I’m really sorry!”
“Sorry doesn’t cut it!” Kendra shouted, picking up the liquor bottle that was on the floor and tossing it at Gwen’s head. Screaming, she ducked down, but that didn’t stop the glass from shattering on the wall behind her, pieces of the bottle flying everywhere, one landing deep in her calf. Gwen shouted in pain, but that piece of glass in her leg was the last thing she needed to worry about. Her mother was angry, and she wasn’t sure what she was going to do next. Angrily, Kendra marched up to Gwen and grabbed her by her hair, yanking her aggressively into the washroom. Her mother gasped as she saw the hair that was littered in the sink. Gwen didn’t even dare mention the glass in her leg. The little girl was thrown up onto the counter once again. “Do you see what you’ve done! You’ve ruined yourself, and now I have to fix it.” And so her mother picked up the scissors.
“Please… it’s fine, mommy. Really! I promise I’ll be good! I won’t do it agai-“ but it was too late. Her mother had already begun grabbing chunks of her hair, snipping it off until there was barely anything left. Gwen was sobbing, crying as her mother hacked off more and more of the little girl’s hair and before she knew it, most of the hair was in the sink.
“A fresh start, that’s what you needed,” her mother spat. Gwen was still crying, unsuccessfully holding back tears before her mother stormed out of the washroom. Gwen dared to look around, take a look at the mess that she was in the mirror. Her hair barely grazed her head, uneven and terrible all over the place. Carefully, cautiously, she hopped down from the sink, making her way to the closet in the washroom, pulling out a towel before she let herself take out the shard of glass in her leg. She wrapped it tight around her skin, felt blood seeping out, felt pain throb into the wound as she pressed against it with the fabric, trying to get the bleeding to stop, but all it did was run, slowly but surely, onto the white towel.
Gwen woke up the next morning to the sound of her mother crying. Stone cold sober, Gwen jumped up from her bed and ran into the washroom where she saw her mother staring at the sink. Nervous and cautious, Gwen kept her distance. “No… no I didn’t…” Kendra whispered, blinking back and forth from Gwen to her locks in the drain before seeing the makeshift tourniquet on her leg. “Guinevere please tell me I didn’t hurt you…” she whispered attempting to come close, but Gwen took a step back, and her mother lost it. All of a sudden her mother moved into her bedroom, throwing her clothes and her one stuffed animal into her small school bag before throwing it at the door and finding Gwen’s little brother, still sleeping soundly in his room.
“Mommy? What’s going on?” Gwen asked carefully.
“You and your little brother are going to take a vacation. It’ll be good for you, really good. You’ll get to stay with other little kids just like you,” Kendra whispered, tears pricking her eyes. Gwen could feel the same happening to her as she crawled in the back seat of the small car, her backpack tightly secured to her. Slowly, they drove up to a home. It wasn’t familiar to Gwen, and although she couldn’t read, the sign outside said New Orleans Children’s Home.
“How long?” Gwen asked, curious as her mother walked her to the door.
“Not too long. I’ll be back for you soon, Guinevere. I promise,” she whispered as she kissed Gwen’s cheek before ringing the doorbell and getting back in the car, driving away before the door could be answered.
Two weeks later, after numerous kids laughing and making fun of her messily cut hair, the woman who ran the home took a razor to her scalp, cleaning up what was left of her brunette hair. It made the bullying even worse. It took a year and a half to grow back to just past her shoulders, but the bullying didn’t stop. Kids taunted her, liked to remind her of her past. She finally escaped the tormenting of the meaner kids when she moved in with the Goodwins. Taking their last name, moving schools, growing up, it changed who she was. She’s vowed to herself she’ll never be like her mother. She’ll never break promises and she’ll never hurt them. She’s learned to stand up for herself, to push past the people who treated her poorly, she just wishes she didn’t have to get there in this way.
What is your real birth name? What name do you use? If you have a nickname, what is it and where did you get it?
Full birth-name: Guinevere Marie Gilbert. Most people call me Gwen since Guinevere is super formal. Don’t quite know where it originated from... probably my parents.
Describe what you look like: height, weight, body type, hair, eyes, skin, apparent age, distinguishing features, tattoos, scars.
I’m about 5 foot 7, and I probably weigh about 125. I’m lean, with dark brown hair and light brown eyes. I’m a pretty pale white when it comes to my skin tone. I look about 19 or 20, I’d say, but I’m 18. My distinguishing features? My dimples. I have no scars, but I do have the saying "Nous protégeons ceux qui ne peuvent pas se protéger eux-mêmes.” tattooed on my ribcage.
In your opinion, what is your best feature?
It’s either my mind/intelligence or my smile. People have also said they liked my eyes, so I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
How was your relationship with your parents like when you were young? How is your current relationship with them?
I’ve always loved both my parents with all my heart, and I always will. My mom and dad taught me how to be strong and then some. I really value them in my life, but I’m also a big girl now. I can hold my own.
What is your relationship with your siblings like? Have you done things to each other that is hard to forgive? Write your thoughts on each one.
Grayson and I were close before he skipped town. Ever since, we’ve kind of seemed to keep our distance, which sucks, because I love him. I’m also glad he’s not dead because when those rumours were swirling around, I couldn’t take it. I was so worried. [ @grayson--gilbert ]
Jake and I are the typical brother-sister relationship. We bicker, we fight, we love each other. I don’t know where I’d be without this goofball. I love him to death. [ @the-jakexgilbert ]
[ Relationships ]
When and with whom was your first kiss? Where did it happen? What was it like?
I think I was 13, and it was at my grade 8 graduation. My best guy friend, Jason, and I had been “flirting” with each other the past six months and then he finally worked up the courage to kiss me after we slow danced.
Are you a virgin? If yes, how do you feel about your virginity? If no, when and with whom did you lose your virginity? Where did it happen? What was it like?
I’ve come close to losing it a few times, but I still haven’t, so yeah, I am a virgin. I mean, it’s something I’ve thought about, but when the time comes, I’ll know when, I guess. I kind of want it to be with someone I care about. I’m not really up for a one night stand or something along those lines.
Have you ever been in love? How do you fall in and out of love? (Easily? Devotedly? Rarely?)
I don’t know if I really know what love is. I mean, I thought I loved Jason, but I was also 14 at the time and really naïve.
Do you have a spouse, partner, or significant other right now? If yes, describe this person. If no, are you looking? Why or why not?
Single as a pringle, currently happy. Doesn’t mean I’m not looking, but I’m not actively looking. If it happens, it happens.
Who was the last person you loved and why did it not work out?
Jason. We didn’t know what love was, and we thought we had it, but we didn’t.
What is more important to you: sex or intimacy? Why?
They’re both important.
How important is the institution of marriage to you?
Well, as long as I don’t end up divorced like my parents...
Do you have children? If not, do you want children? Under what circumstances, if any, do you see children happening?
I guess, someday, I’ll want a family. Doesn’t every girl?
What is the worst thing you have done to someone you loved?
Not believed them.
What is the worst thing that someone you’ve loved has done to you?
Not believed me.
[ People ]
Who in town would you think would do anything for you?
My family. [ @grayson--gilbert @the-jakexgilbert ]
Which person do you consider to be your best friend? How do you feel about them?
I’m kind of an independent. I don’t think I have a best friend.
Who is someone you’ve always admired from afar and would like to get to know more?
Lily Lockwood seems like a badass. [ @lockwoodfire ]
Which person has the opposite affect and makes you never want to get to know them any better.
Klaus Mikaelson. [ @longlivethehybrid ]
Who would you prefer to be your roommate if you had to live with someone?